I have often thought that a fathers job lay not only in his ability to provide.It is to enlighten your children with love of life. With that in mind I feel it important that we pass old wisdom's to the new. Time has a way of wearing us down. The old recriminations seem to ring out hollow as we ourselves become polished by the winds of time. In that end we see that enlightenment shows bright upon the simple truths that society masks and hides. We are here to succeed in life. Not monetarily but by producing a better version of us each time. Darwin would be proud. However to me Humanity has transcended the boundary of sentient thought. Leaving us a greater purpose that of carrying our brother along with us on life's journey.
Yesterday was the 20th running of the memorial race for my grandfather Eddie.may he rest in peace.
They don't make those men anymore!
My Review
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Now what do you think I am going to say about this, huh? First let me say.. Oh my that pic!!!!!! Fab darlin!
Now to the piece.. WOW.. This flipped me out. Your words, images, all brought such memories to my mind. Of my children, all four that are my heart, my soul, my very existence. I live through them, just as your beautiful piece says, it holds such truth my friend. That is what all of us love about you. Your work has meaning, faith, worth. And all is not lost on anyone that takes the time to look upon these words. For in the end, when that last word has been sent into our thoughts, we then look back and remember, to a time of our lives when we too felt such an emotion.
"My duty in this life is clear
pass love from the child within me
Along with prayers from those that died
for all the hopes of things to be"
My favorite passage.:) However, the ending was what made this piece for me. I also believe we live on forever in our children. Loving them, teaching them, guiding them, standing beside them. Embedding our faith and joy, our wishes and dreams, sometimes without even knowing we are doing so. What we share, especially if it is done through selflessness and kindness lives on. I work with children, I see in their eyes everyday the amount of influence their parents, myself and the world has on them. I see in their faces all the things we could do, the places we could go, if we all but shared what we know.
This is profound and well written. Very solid, hard-hitting rhyme scheme which gives the poem a chunky, satisfying feel. I notice that in each verse, a particular sound dominates throughout... Verse 1, for example, uses the "f" sound prominently, in Verse 2, it's the soft "i" sound, in Verse 3, the soft "e", and so on. These are all soft sounds, and they give each verse a sort of dreaminess which contrasts with the chunky rhyme scheme, as well as tying each verse together, each verse reading like a single sentence (at least, to me). Very coherent. I'm not sure if your use of sounds in this way is intentional, in which case, it is very sophisticated writing, or subconscious, in which case, you have a very highly developed feel for language. Either way, it's excellent. Just a thought, but I think you could lose the first verse without hurting the poem at all. First verse is OK but not as strong as the rest of the poem and I think it would be neater and stronger if it started at "Each day...", but that is a totally personal thing. This poem is overall very classic in style, quite old-school, and the subject matter is intense which gives the poem depth, but very nicely expressed, light enough to be a contemplation, a consideration of serious matters, but without being overly intense or self-indulgent. I hope this makes sense!! lol. I really like this poem.
Very strong and powerful poem! I love every word of it, This one here I can say really stands out and is very strong. It brings tears to my eyes. I love it and think this is a great piece, you written this very well thank you for sharing
~Bridget~
wow this one could make me cry! i have a son who is 3 months without a mom or anything to support him.
maybe one of the first poems that really could bring tears. i love it.
We are the gifts our parents give to us .. sometimes wonderful and precious, sometimes sad and wretched; whatever those gifts are, we surely have to 'enlighten' children with a love of life .. and of course, love.
An emotional write .. 'Faith is a fine invention ~ that plays within us safe and warm ~ I hope that it will make death wait ~ till I have weathered through life's storm '
lol at the picture!! it stood out at me! but the sentiments are powerful - the idea of living on through successors - carrying on the legacy - true immortality perhaps - in spirit and name!!! nice!
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I am a product of the Midwest. Raised on the plain states of North America. I was nurtured on a .. more..