Day is Night

A nightmare about being alone

What I am none seems to know

my friends leave me by the many

I am the consumption of my dreams

till I find I haven't realized any

____________________________

Into the nothing of the noise

surrounding us all the where

A life of waking dreams abides

a living breathing nightmare

___________________________

My days are raging shipwrecks

on the tumultuous waves of life

Scattered as to the four winds

upon the rocks that are my strife

___________________________

I long for the days of childhood

when friends were like my brothers

Strength of virtue crowned my head

loved and untouched by any others

___________________________

Certain purpose was my goal

no question on the morrow

I woke to conscience that was clear

courage and faith I didn't borrow

___________________________

Now the dawn speaks of the dark

closing in upon my soul

With every day I linger on

my life rages out of control

Reviews

[emmajoy]

What a wonderful picture! Like your poem it has a dark, brooding atmosphere, the gradual extinguishing of the human spirit. I so want to light a candle and have it flicker your thoughts into something lighter.

Grand meter and use of words, sad, sad, sad thoughts and wishes.

[AlieahRose]

YOUR WRITTING IS SO RAW...
THIS POEM IS A PERFECT EXAMPLE...
I REALLY LIKE THIS ONE...

[The Analog Kid]

Sorry Charles, these are called colloquialisms. I can translate for you. I liked the picture for its relation to the poem. "Sweet" = "nice job on the third stanza, Tate." Damn, there are some pretentious people on here doing "reviews."

[Charles]

There's nothing that I'd call 'nice' or 'sweet' about this poem (as other reviewers have) - it is simply great. Masterful. The meter, rhyming, sentence structure, flow and theme are perfect. Good work... it'll go in my library. :-)

[Norma M Sutton]

This is a excellent way of putting it too. Well said.

[Geralyn Miller]

Dark, thoughtful and compelling; so many are unable to soar to reach their dreams because they are earthbound by their broken childhood. Others are caged by their own fear of failure, if they never try, they never fail. They never understand that not trying is failure. Stil more are condemned by the deeds they have down, and so condemned to never suceed. The rest of us need to ralize, you don't fail until you quit trying.
Thank you for a thought provoking piece.

[The Analog Kid]

The third stanza is really sweet. This is dark for you. Nice pic.

[Ellen Hammond]

Deep, dark, and very thought provoking poem to which everyone can relate a few times in their lives. One good thing, besides great poetry, that comes from such times in our lives is that we discover who our true friends really are. Many will be around in the sunshine but flee when we need them most. I was going to mention my favorite stanza but each time I read it, a different one pops out at me. Very nicely penned and presented. The pic and music add a finishing touch.

[Lilly]

An incredible and very relatable piece. We all know of the dark times, (In some form) that you write of. The vivid imagery really helps convey the emotions into this poem...

[Kes]

My days are raging shipwrecks
on the tumultuous waves of life
Scattered as to the four winds
upon the rocks that are my strife

Ouch. Very nice. I love that stanza. The imagery is so vivid. It helps that I've seen many a shipwreck and have been grounded while sailing before - grounded as in: hit a sandbank and got stuck. Storms at sea are really nasty too. Been there, done that!
But, back to your fantastic poem! I loved it. I could really feel the malevolence and the despair, and I could see everything you described. Great stuff, truly great.