It is almost comical to me just how naive we men are about our own weakness. So I wrote this for the women to understand what it is that drives men. For the men this is no surprise it is what men are taught from cradle to the grave.
My Review
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Most enjoyable. Simple but great wisdom. I confess I am full of P. I agree it can be a flaw, but it is also perhaps what makes us exciting, what drives us on. Cruel Life demands that we win, win, win. Maybe pride is a sort of oil in our cogs. What are we without it? As ever balance is all though. Too little and we are inert, too much and we are insufferable.
I like you poem very much, but my criticism remains as I've mentioned before: your punctuation wrongly placed detracts from the poem. You might try writing some poems without any punctuation and let me look at it. Some poets think punctuation doesn't matter and errors are fine, but I am not one of those poets. Please don't think I am being unnecessarily harsh, but punctuation marks mean something. A period closes a thought, a comma pauses, a semicolon connects ideas, etc. You can't put a period in the middle of a sentence!
First let me say this is a wonderfully executed poem. Great meter. Great rhyme. Wonderfully written. On that, highest marks. We may quibble with content, but technically the poem is excellent. There is even teasing humor pouring through the piece. So that said, let's move to the poem's content.
Ah, men's pride. First, why do men have pride, why do they fight and try to outdo the other guy? Well the roots are probably biological. If we don't beat the other guy, he gets the food, he gets the girl, he gets whatever he can take from you. So it has historically been important to be competitive, and that is how fathers raised sons. Hence pride.
Now are men all the way you depict? Well as has been said by other reviewers, everyone is a bit different. And, of course, any single individual cannot speak for all others. They simply haven't lived in their shoes and seen the world through their eyes. So let me speak for myself as a man. Am I prideful? Well I'm proud of what I have accomplished and I am certainly very competitive. But I think I can say that I am not boastful. I find that in poor taste. I also do not need people to remind me of what I have done and to tell me how wonderful I am. In fact too much of that starts to annoy me. I am myself my most important critic. If I am happy with some particular accomplishment that is generally good enough for me. Indeed, if others disagree and say instead that this particular accomplishment is minor or of no worth, I am quite likely to form the opinion that this person simply doesn't know what they are talking about. I guess that's self-confidence. So would a woman that feeds my pride be especially attractive to me? I'd have to say the answer to this is no. Her personality, honesty, and other qualities are really what's important, at least to me. And if I cheated on my wife, it would have nothing to do with pride. Lust, maybe, but not pride. In fact my opinion of myself would go down and negatively affect my pride.
So finally, from one proud man to another, this is a wonderful poem and it is certainly one of which you can be proud!
Whoaa! This is stunning. The first stanza really grabbed me in, it was lovely. Pride is something men and women should always have. This was constructed very nicely.
This is amazing, no doubt about it.
The last two stanzas were the icing for this, they made the poem feel so true and real.
Great job on this one Tate.
~Domo~
Pride be it male or female is only Ego in control. when we can release hat and live by our concious(souls) then we are truly living.
this is a well written poem and you definitely made some very valid points.
written so nicely as all of your pieces are written. thank you for sharing this, Tate.
Men are such strange creatures. Bless the bluster and bravado though. What would life be without the muscle and sinew. The pride that puffs a man up when he looks with love on that one of the fairer sex who melts his heart.
The reason men are unfaithful;
why they only behave by her side.
Has little to do with temper;
and everything to do with pride.
If you wish for a happy home;
a man who's strait forward and true.
Then play host to his foolish pride;
and he will stay true to you.
These are some amazing lines here, I like this.
But I wouldn't call it pride. I would just call it
something that he can't speak.
I like this alot. You have expressed such wonderful
emotion in this write. Very wonderful write here.
You speak from the heart.
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I am a product of the Midwest. Raised on the plain states of North America. I was nurtured on a .. more..