Not Forgotten

 

I thought I had forgotten

what with spring came back to me

Words un-uttered thoughts we stirred

of the way things use to be

 

I remember the dark door

where we hid from all the rain

A dry respite from the storm

safe in arms I'd felt no pain

 

I went back to the small doorway

where happily our loves had played

My heart ached for what could have been

if behind that door we had stayed

 

With wild, spring, rain and thunder

something wondrous comes this way

Your eyes had said more that night

than your lips could ever say

 

Author's Note

Sometimes the thoughts of the mind take me back to times that seem like yesterday. However the day has set on those times and the new day risen on better ones.
This is a poem set to a 7 syllable count in the meter. It has a simple A.B.C.B. rhyme scheme. The 2nd line of each quatrain rhymes with the 4th.

Reviews

[Robbie~xoxo~]

WOW Tater Tot... This has left me breathless!
I am truly surprised by the passion in your words! OH MY! :D
Now this is worth reading over and over again, it makes the heart race...such palpable yearning etched between the lines...Lovely write!~xoxo~:)

[Tate Morgan]

Truly this is as good as my romantic heart can get

[Barbz]

Why is someone else using my pic? Barbz......not my review

[Tate Morgan]

Your humor is showing today barbz

[Barbz]

Sorry about this Tate, I wasn't trying to be humorous, merely curious. I went to this site to read this work last nite and tried to review it , but wasn't able. I scrolled down and saw my pic and a review.....however their was a different name under my pic with a review that I didn't write. I see that it's gone this morn....some sort of a snag, I assume........Barbz

[Barbz]

Just noticed, it was LadyAnn68....her pic is on it now. Glitch! Not a problem...

[Tate Morgan]

we do have gliches here like that

[NM Sarah]

I liked the end on this one. I thought the lines "Of the way things used to be" and "my heart ached for what could have been" were a little "precious"... that's just me. I prefer the stronger statements like "with wild, spring, rain and thunder;/ Something wondrous comes this way."

Thanks.
Sarah

[there is no more from m..]

Grate Poem :)

[gimpy]

your eyes had said more that nigh then your lips could ever say dis line particulary attracted my interest becuse of the truth of it love can not be spoken through words but is known by the loved

[Aradie Rain]

I love this! The rhyming works with this one, (doesnt sound childish at all!), I love the last lines

Your eyes had said more that night;
Than your lips could ever say.

Amazing, somtimes words are not needed. :) love it

[Coyote Poetry]

Photo made your words come alive. A beautiful poem. I love the eyes of woman. They can tell you a thousand stories. Make you wish to stay or want to escape.
Coyote

[R J Askew]

Very tender I especially like the last two lines.

[Magdelena]

You have brough forth a pssion write. And one that has stolen my heart, not a easy thing to do either let me tell ya! This was perfection, all YOUR wrods were. I would not change a thing. Always go with what you feel deep within. That's who is your worst critic is, you!
And it is the perfect length too! lol

Loved it!!!!

Mags xx

[Katie]

Amazing imagery, and such lovely passion.. I really like this piece!

[Helen Crutchett]

Awww...so deliciously romantic, endearing beyond words and
another excellent write. Amazing and beautiful. Lovely photo too.

Helena

[Melanie Jane Boicourt S..]

I like it but this line bothered me.

"Words unuttered thoughts we stirred;
Of the way things use to be."

I am sorry but I am not going to blow smoke. I have to be honest. I wish that I could suggest something to help you but I am not sure why it doesn't read right to me.

Maybe it needs a comma or maybe it needs a possesive apostrophe on "Words". I am not sure.
Anyway, good luck with all.

Melanie