Friendly Lass

 

 

 

 

 

 ______________________

I strolled aside the storming sea.

Waves cascading by the shore.

Dreamed a dream that could not be.

Said they to me dream no more.

_______________________________ 

I screamed at heaven "I'll sail the sea".

"To the lands from where you came".

"Ocean breezes shall blow from me".

"The memory of your name".

 _______________________________

But stubborn was my imagination.

Tried to quell my aching heart.

Instead it brought you from creation.

And then my life it would start.

________________________________ 

You would love the whole of me.

With all I am you're seeing.

Love who I am before thee.

Care for me in all my being.

 ________________________________

I want to die while you love me.

When yet you’d hold me fair.

While laughter is within thee.

Lights twinkling in the night air.

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Tate 

 

 

Reviews

[Charles]

I like this style of writing from your hand... easy to read and on a subject that I focus on quite a bit. At the very beginning, I wonder whether beside is a better word than aside - just a question. The first stanza (which I like a lot, by the way) illustrates something I mentioned in another review: the last line of the stanza has a contrivance (inversion of usual subject-verb sequence): said they to me. Here it is very effective and flows nicely... the masculine sound helps the meter. I wouldn't think the quotation mark and period after me in the second stanza is necessary, but can magine why they're there. The rhyming sequence is good - it depends a lot on a couple of words, but that is hardly noticable. Good work.

[harman kour]

lovely poem!!! your poems always have the same rhyming scheme and a melancholy tinge... Its beautiful But I would like to read something thats different in its style and is inspiring from you! You are a brilliant writer!

[Holly-Marie]

What a beautiful, peaceful poem. Loved it. You have a wonderful way of painting a picture with our poetry.

[Coyote Poetry]

Your poem is beautiful. I enjoyed reading the poem. The flow of words and a grand story.. Anything to do with love and the ocean are my favorite to read. Thank you.
Coyote

[Faelyn ó Cuilinn]

Grand words and such a peaceful heart you have. THe words are magic to an Irish lass' ears. I love the way you described it...and keep it in mind that nothing is too far out of reach. All you have to do is believe. Let the sidhe be your lead. My dearest Midir helps me constantly. :) .....such a lovely poem. SO graceful and light. :)

[J]

Ahhhh a Celtic lilt I breathe into these lines I fell, the heart of a lad so taken . . . by a lass, she is never forsaken. A dream, ye be, Tate, with these lines before me now, may the lights twinkle ever around ye. ;-)
j

[LisetteCanWrite!]

So much feeling rolled into this.. with a feeling of releasing a dream to find something perhaps deeper or it can also be releaseing love to find a dream (depending on if the younger dream was love or work related).. this could be related to on more than one level especially in such changing times.. I feel many are reevaluating what is important to them today.. the rhythm, rhyme and flow never disappoint.. this was beautiful and creative from the heart!

[Ebb and Flow]

Breathtaking and I am at a loss for words!


Krys

[Helen Crutchett]

How do you do it? How do you manage to come up
with such wonderful poems everytime. Brillliantly
written Tate. Endearing and heartfelt, definately
one of your best. ~ Helena

[Jennifer Marie Theresa ..]

Amazing and heart gripping...vie for someone you love is remarkable.

[Georgia Gypsy]

So lovely and romantic! It truely pains a picture of your hear, soul and being!
I always know with your poetry that i will not be dissapointed. The love you pour into the words is evident.
Wonderful!
Keep it up tate, you are a great poet!