A Lesson Learned

How kind her teared eyes that hid the truth; from the lips that would never confess.

 

Rode the train with my girl today

across the barn swept hollows

Past lush fields of emerald green

with the life and love that follows

 

The train car tapped out a lullaby beat

which spent our time lost in leisure

The smiles past came by with the peace

life's sweet gifts we couldn’t measure

 

A man had set across the aisle of us

he seemed so different from me

Clothes tattered, torn and weathered

homeless and likely worn hard was he

 

I couldn’t help but to take the notice

his features hewn and deeply lined

Drawing a map of where he'd been

red eyed he looked half blind

 

Something alone in his vacant stare

said It was me that he resembled

The thought had taken me a-fright

I looked hard, long and trembled

 

I saw my lover look over him too

noticed the hair might be the same

Except for straggling beard and decay

I had felt a deep sense of shame

 

Could that be what would happen to me

what fallen angel had led him astray

A nightmare vision of life’s full truth

eyes of pain in the heart they betray

 

Then my lover looked back upon me

her thoughts she sought hard to repress

How kind those teared eyes that hid the truth

from her lips that would never confess

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Author's Note

An introspective mirror of myself.

Reviews

[Shelly Braen]

This piece holds unmaginable beauty! The seasoned timelessness of such a beautiful, yet solomn journey through the eyes of such a man, yet the thought that they might be yor own looking back at you from the differences of eras. How could a person be more beautiful than the man sat in front of you. Wonderful! Simply wonderful!

[Samuel Dickens]

But for the life-choices we make, there is surely a worn, weary and less desireable version of ourselves out there somewhere. By the same token, there may be the opposite as well. Your attention to rhyme and meter is excellent.

[Domenic Luciani]

Haha, you were right! I have to say the second and fourth stanzas were my favorite, but it told a really cool story..

[DBURKE]

Wow great poem and story! I love the imagery and the way the poem ended. She wanted to comfirm your fears but wouldnt dare- Good write

[VioletRose]

This poem was great! good write.

[heido]

I like the homage paid to String Theory.
The possibilites of several universes occuring at once, with seperate outcomes of ourselves, based on minute differences.
Lovely.

[The Analog Kid]

I feel like I am on that train. Maybe, I am that young man. This is great, because I felt myself looking inward, just like the narrator. We will all get old, and life isn't always a bed of roses. Also, maybe his lover was just feeling sorry for the old weathered man---but the young man knows something in HIS heart could lead him down that same path.

[Scarlet Pulse]

I really enjoyed reading this poem. It has great rhythm and you did a great job with end rhymes (every other line). This poem was very interesting to me and you used really good language and good imagery to help me feel and be on the train. Great job.

[Mai Aliza]

I think what I really love about your writing is that it rhymes, and makes sense! Most writers fail to do that; I love it.

[Natase J. Hopkins]

Tate. I really like this piece. It is pretty damn remarkable. I like the way it treats the reader as a traveler by paving a winding road for us too walk. Listening to this beautiful story of perception and image. I love the twist at the end and the way it reminder us that no matter how certain we are, are we truly certain -- that things are as they seem? Great work!