My Immortal Soul

I watch my son embark on life

and I wish him all the best

His way will be no easier

than it's been for all the rest

 

The first child's life is the hardest

as they blaze their new found trails

Upon their shoulders rides the weight

of siblings, hopes and travails

 

An old woman once asked of me

as she touched upon my fears

"What do you want your son to be

when he reaches adult years"

 

I thought a while then with a smile

said that"happy" was my goal

"There might be hope for mankind yet

and for your immortal soul"

We might just ask too much of each

newly born generation

 Expecting them to build upon

the previous foundation

 

It's pride that tweaks our vanity

in damned pride our soul believes

Why is it only through this pain

that by love, our soul relieves

  I'll have that old woman to thank

when I swim the great expanse

There I'll make for the distant bank

where fate may grant me that chance

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Author's Note

The weight we place upon the shoulders of our children is also a heavy burden we carry upon our own souls. Knowing they will try to reach those expectations, whose fault is it really but ours if they cannot? We give them the gift of life. Then try to lead by example. However we can only hope we have done well by them and headed them in the right direction. Let happiness be your guide!

Reviews

[zainul]

I dedicate my reverence to Tate Morgan who presented this masterpiece for the community of humans engaging their talent and time in WritersCafe.
This poem has envisaged a popular discussion which has already earned about 80 reviews ans 800 views.
I feel proud that Tate has become in his right a great preacher for the good of family,children,tradition and heritage.
Reading all the amazing reviews,I am convinced to say that the world still belongs to pure human beings,not to the fictional characters like vampires,wolves,ghosts and aliens.
Family bondage,love among parents and children,social norms and values and responsibility of parents to their children and vice versa still make the world moving like an entity.
Tate created this poem instilling all good characters of good poem with rhymes which he specifically mentioned in his note.This is a lesson for all of us who choose perfection.
He tried to add other elements to amuse his readers too.The portrait of a happy child in a field of cereal makes me so happy that I feel myself in the paradise.
The addition of wonderful music video to entertain the readers reflects his taste of classical heart.
I agree with all reviewers what have been noted here for the benefit of our children.I strongly feel
that this poem along with its precious reviews is a great symbol of benevolent poetry.

[Tate Morgan]

What could I say to that fine review that wasn't felt in the reading of it? Truly a genuine and benevolent gift .I I feel honored and humbly thank you
Tate

[zainul]

I feel honored that you have accepted this humble review.
Thank you very much.

[Muse]

You touched upon a sensitive subject matter. I think I"m correct to say that you and I share in the fact, that we are the oldest siblings in our family? The expectations at times...are just obscene and unfair. If we make a mistake...it's a travesty. Yet when the other siblings fall short of make some sort of error...it gets brushed off...overlooked and sometimes even justified. I understand your inspirations here in this writing...I could not have penned it better myself.

I thought a while then with a smile
said that"happy" was my goal
"There might be hope for mankind yet
and for your immortal soul"

Brilliant!

[Tate Morgan]

thank you That actually happened i use to take a woman who was 93 at the time to our thanksgiving dinner.i cant remember how i met her.But i liked her and she upon seeing my year old son asked me .What do you want your son to be when he grows up happy said .I still stand by that

[The Analog Kid]

Very well stated Muse. I am the eldest child and grandchild out of 9 and my son is the the oldest grandchild out of 9....it's hard to blaze the trail!

[Tate Morgan]

I agree and it will be mo easier for your son .Funny how others always seem to dismiss the second third and forth kids as if the first was the benchmark the rest didnt matter

[Distant horizons]

The expectations of the future us may well be daunting for both the adult and child, but there will always be the adventure of life to keep us all entertained. Superbly written as always Tate.Happy is all we can hope for.

[Tate Morgan]

I agree may we all let go the hopes of our own lives for the sake of theirs

[Coyote Poetry]

"I thought a while then with a smile
said that"happy" was my goal"
This is my goal too. To have your children happy and content with their life. I like the journey and the positive ending. Thank you my friend for your outstanding poetry.
Coyote

[cynthiabuhainbaello]

This poem is excellently written in form and flow, theme and impact. As a parent, I have allowed my children freedom to make their own choices and trails, but have always been there when they fail (that rhymes). My Dad was a strict father, a university professor of Economics and a contributing Editor of a major Newspaper in the 50's-60's in our country. As such, he made demands on us his children and imposed his own perceptions of what could give us success in life. Of course, that created conflict specially in our teenage years. Your poem somehow touched on that and there is truth to it in some cases, but that was precisely why I let my children be free to be what they want to be.

[Cristina Moldoveanu]

Perfect life conclusions. This poem is wise and beautiful. I think that wishing for the happiness of our children is the best choice for a parent. It is harder to understand than it may seem.

[Tate Morgan]

Oh yes and here it is a real quest to let go of the child and let them grow and go their own way

[Cristina Moldoveanu]

I agree. Man has to learn about this from natural examples around him. Too much protection can lead to inhibitions in child's life.

[Seashell]

Such a beautiful heartfelt confession
Yes I agree that sometimes we expect too much from them... but we learn as the years roll by, and in doing so, rearrange our priorities when our children's children come along.
I personally never set out with an unachievable goal for them and in fact my wish and desire was that they were healthy and happy with what God gave them. I was one of the lucky ones I guess.
Thank you for special share xx

[Manpreet]

No day was better than me reading this piece today, it was as if someone answering to all my questions through the lines " It's pride that tweaks our vanity

in damned pride our soul believes

Why is it only through this pain


that by love, our soul relieves


Thanks for sharing yet another masterpiece from your collection!

[Lena M. P.]

So very true Tate. Beautiful poem. Hope all is well with you. (PS - one of my favorite crooners :) )

[Tate Morgan]

I like him too I guess that says Im old lol

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

A deliberate attempt one might wonder on teh lines of the course of the piece. Worded perfectly as per usual my darling! Well done, good read.

[Tate Morgan]

Thomas there is just something majestic about you Thank you Quality I suppose ,Quality

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

Stop it! You know as well as I do, that I enjoy reading great poetry which you provide in droves, be well!

[Tate Morgan]

And you too Hope your family is well

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

Indeed they are and thank you for asking, I do hope you and yours are well!

[Tate Morgan]

All is well the sun shines on our world again.