Silently Existing

An older poem I wrote back in 2007.

I see your face
Cast with expressions of black on white
Roughly carven from stone
Existing, but only just slight

Today was Autumn
And I lingered there
In the drifting sea of color
But even then, I watched you stare
As you smiled to another…

And I sat upon a throne of marble
Braiding the strands of time
As the snow kissed your lips
Silently knowing, that you cannot be mine..

Reviews

[The Realist]

wow. i was hooked from the start, until i got near the end, i didn't want it to end.
'And I sat upon a throne of marble, Braiding the strands of time'- this, this is wonderful, great imaginary Caddy.

[Caddy]

Thank you very much for the kind words. Sadly all things must come to an end lol

[The Realist]

Indeed they do, but its usually the best things that end quickly.

[An owl on the moon]

This is one of the reasons I love poetry; it is timeless and always so powerfully relevant. The seasons come alive again in your words, and every hue and color is vividly moving.

[Caddy]

Thank you so much for your words. I truly appreciate it

[Patricia Stephmore]

Your poetry bowls me over every time I read it......another poem that hits the feels....."silently knowing you cannot be mine."
What beautiful words you use.....

[Caddy]

Thank you my dear! I am glad you enjoyed it :)

[Andrew Nelson Stewart]

Reminds me of that one line from the Song Desperado by The Eagles, saying

"Now it seems to me, some fine things
Have been laid upon your table
But you only want the ones that you can't get

Desperado, oh, you ain't gettin' no younger
Your pain and your hunger, they're drivin' you home
And freedom, oh freedom well, that's just some people talkin'
Your prison is walking through this world all alone."

To pull out your poem , things are as they are. Looking out into the universe at night, we make no comparisons between right and wrong stars, nor between well and badly arranged constellations. Just the freedom and gratitude of seeing such a view. I enjoyed your poem and very relatable of pain, lust and desires we can get sometimes in our pathway to the shore with life and love along the way.

And I sat upon a throne of marble
Braiding the strands of time
As the snow kissed your lips
Silently knowing, that you cannot be mine..

This last stanza displayed to me that you discovered the beauty of ''his image'' that he fell in love with to love himself more within the image of being a COWBOY feeling high on his high horse, like sitting on the fence that borders FREEDOM, either to find time to jump or get off his horse and take a chance to commit himself to the love that was offered to him truely on a silver platter as by the Queen of Hearts sort of speaking that loves him and wants to love him on her side of the border or fence.

But to chase the wild Queen of Diamonds to catch that ''lovely image'' of life also sees to love and to feel like you've worked hard to earn it like some kind of a CONQUISTODOR to chase down your love dream. To which, usually in the long run he doesn't love you back and you get hurt, only to be reminded again to come to your senses by coming down from your tired horse, to go back for your ''best bet'' which is ''the Queen of Hearts'' to surrender to love before it's to late to draw him out of his prison where he has been waiting for his angel in shinning life that he has been in the rain and chasing rainbows for to long to finally see the one above him as a sign of triumph and glory to let her love him before it's to late.

In general, Life and love combines together with present time fleeting. You write beautifully and keep writing poetry on hearts around and especially yours. Sincerely your friend in poetry and life.

[Caddy]

I love when people tell me how they interpret my works. Not only do they get something from it, I do as well. I get different views of the words, different stories, different meanings. And I find myself wondering what the words were really about, even though I wrote it. (If i am making any sense lol)

Thank you for your kind words and telling me how you read the words and related them. I truly appreciate it. :)

[Andrew Nelson Stewart]

I'm the same way, when writing we find ambiguous meanings with our own soul, some writes we know its intention and while others we go along the lines of the waves, hoping it will bring you to shore or the ocean either way its meaningful to be part of the journey taking hold. Thank you for sharing. Keep being awesome Caddy:). Sincerely your friend in poetry and life.

[LapseOfMind]

Nicely done! A good, easy flow with a lot going on in the few words you wrote. Definitely sad yet wonderful, considering most people can relate. Good job!

[Caddy]

Thank you very much! Love your work btw.

[LapseOfMind]

Thanks! I enjoy yours as well!

[Ben Barton]

Love unrequited can paralyse us, and it's only too easy to fall into the trap it presents. I love the way you've explored this! Considering it was written 9 years ago (2007 was 9 years ago!?!?!), this is very good. Keep on writing! :)

[Caddy]

Now I feel old lol, thanks :P

Thank you for the kind words :)

[Relic]

Life does seem to drain of all its color when we are unable to capture the love of someone we want badly. "Braiding the strands of time" is a great line.

The cold creeps in every autumn and the coldness of being overlooked and cast aside is a good metaphor within this beautiful poem.

[Caddy]

Many thanks for the kind words. I very much appreciate it.

[Coyote Poetry]

A story told in the short poem. I liked how you used the description. Create place and emotion. Good flow of thoughts led to strong ending. Thank you Caddy for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Caddy]

Thank you very much for the kind words. Very much appreciated.
I look forward to perusing your works!

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome and good to have met you.