NEWS RELEASE: Almost All of World Evil Wants My Leadership!?!?!?!

See below...

NEWS RELEASE: Almost All of World Evil Wants My Leadership!?!?!?!

So, you want me to lead you to greater good or evil?  Who wants to play, "That could be the big evil?"

Think about it: with all the people wanting my time, who the F-RUCK are you?  

You need to prove your loyalty to me.

I want:

1) More parks for people,

2) Better medicine,

3) Homes for the poor,

4) Personal fortunes lost, and

5) Something for everybody if you can find something everybody wants.  If not, come close.

That is my bidding!  Do not fail me, future minions!

EDITOR'S LATER NOTE:

"But, our leadership is not with this."  That's how you know they are morons and a******s!  If they can't be more popular than me, they should probably die miserably!

They can go and be less popular.  I was less popular once, too!