The Endless East

Progress is illusion. Move forward long enough and you wind up where you were.

and the trees, man...
i used to think they'd go on forever.

remember the moon in the rearview?
orange as a washed-out bloodstain, it was.
and that smile at the corners of your mouth...
the one that seemed like it was sparring with your eyes
for want of a moment that might outlast the view.

the carolinas couldn't hold us.
ya can't live on sunsets alone,
and every one of these words is a sad excuse for trying.

i never wanted to believe
that the best love we'd ever know
was the one we settled for--

or at least, it never felt that way to me.

Reviews

[Tommy]

“i never wanted to believe
that the best love we’d ever know
was the one we settled for—“

Wow, the perception of love, sitting out west, I wonder what I’ve overlooked by leaving the east…

Great Write Blake!
RLG,
Tommy

[Daniel Atkinson]

You had me hooked from the first two lines. You're able to create such vivid imagery within your poems, especially in the second stanza. No criticism here. Wonderful work.

[arbitrary jane]

i've read and come back to this one a few times now.
sometimes your voice is fierce- almost a snarl, and that sits fine with me. and sometimes it's wry and closed - which is equally true, and lets us grin at our stupidity.
and sometimes it's like this - sighing. and searching for context. for a way to look at the things that happen. which is another hill in the mountain range of you.
it's kind of a marvelous thing to walk through.

[Miss Coral]

This is excellent. However, I do think that the structure could create a stronger tone; right now this almost feels hesitant at times. Don't pull back your words in repetitive structure-- don't get caught up in pronouns and articles either.

You have some excellent phrasing and wonderful tones, nice and simplistic and strong behind this. Despite my recent inactivity, I might be logging on a bit to watch your stuff. Thanks for the read.

-Coral

[Emily B]

are you sure you're only 23? this reads like you've seen a whole lifetime

[SpokenWord]

I think everything will go on forever but it always ends at some point. If people work hard enough at a relationship they can make it work but I don't know if they be all that happy. Interesting write one with principals in it.

[ju]

great opening line. like the feel of this- and the sunsets. the smile "sparring with your eyes" really works- as an image, and a trigger for feeling.

[roarke]

very nice.
that's exactly the way it is. Nice capture.

[Lilly Negoi]

ohhhh, this is so beautiful!!
"ya can't live on sunsets alone,
and every one of these words is a sad excuse for trying"
i think this is just a perfect text for my day!