Why am I like this?

This poem is about a teenager getting asked out for the first time. But instead of being excited, she is terrified.

Why am I like this?

He finally asked me out

After a year of anticipation and waiting

He finally asked

It should be an exciting time 

A time that should feel like a high that only teenage love can bring

A time that should be filled with shrieks of joy and exhilaration

And yet

When I see his text I freeze with fear

No thoughts in my mind

No smile on my face

It shouldn't be a terrifying time

A time that shouldn't feel like a low that only your worst nightmare can bring

A time that shouldn’t be filled with dread and panic 

Why am I petrified of the possibilities to come

Why can I not experience that same euphoric feeling my friends do

Why am I like this

Author's Note

Please be nice