River of Life

A poem I wrote about 6 months ago, this is my highest rated poem on other sites, I want any and all critique to help me be a better writer

The River of Life’s Trials

We embark on the river of life
And the current of time that flows
To paddle through all that we know
Ignoring the reflections of strife

Shadowed by the bridges of hope
And flooded by the tears of the rain
Struggling through the rapids of pain
We tie our friendship much like rope

Weaving through the rocks of self doubt
And gazing at the majestic deer
Enjoying the chirps that we hear
Forgetful of the previous year’s drought

Till we arrive at the solemn lake
Where journeys come to an end
And we drift away from our friends
At the bottom we slumber never to wake

Author's Note

A well thought criticism goes further than simple flattery, Please be honest.

Reviews

[Joel Alvarado]

This is a well thought out piece, I love your use of metaphors. Honestly, this is a solid piece that is both thought provoking and real. Nicely done!