Too Much Liquor

He kept drinking his pain away

While ignoring my own

She was popping her pills

Passed out on the coach stoned

He'd hit her and hit me

Too drunk to remember

She was sleeping around

Cheating on him with the neighbor

He was pissing on everything

And screaming those words

She was screaming back

But both their words were slurred

The house was a disaster

We have roaches and fleas

But they didn't care 

They never cared about me

I'd wake up to my name

And it's her crying

She'd say she had enough

That she feels like she's dying

He leaves for six months

But he never talks to me

It was "too painful"

But he'd talk to the other three

The neighbor moved in

She got a new place

We kept moving around

The past she tried to erase

It's nothing to forget

But it's nothing to remember

I lost my childhood 

Because of too much liquor

Author's Note

What do you think about this one?

Reviews

[James William Dyer]

I like it. This is exactly how my childhood went, as well. Fun times, fun times (sarcasm, of course). The only gripe I would have is that in a couple places it is too blunt, you seem to be telling us what happened instead of diaplaying it for us, as in the last two lines: "I lost my childhood, because too much liquor". That is all implied in the poem, and in fact I would replace those lines with something more subtle, something from your later life that shows us the effects of this, or something that makes you think of that time in your life. I liked the poem a lot, though. Oh, n maybe describe what the roaches and fleas do, and you could compare the way your household was run and the lives of your caregivers to the swarms of roaches, etc etc. Nice work, there is so much here to work with.

[Apatheia]

I'm glad you liked it and I kind of wanted those last two lines to be blunt. Thank you for the advice. :)

[Alex]

Great, sad but really good :)

[Apatheia]

Thanks :)

[Belinda]

WOW. I love this! its great, its sad of course, but its honest, it happens. its real. Its about how much your parents can screw up everything that is supposed to be special to a child with their own addictions and problems. I was raised in a house similar to that, but my grandparents got me out of that situation, Thank God. The read was amazing. I was drawn in instantly. Good work.

[Apatheia]

Thank you. I'm glad you liked it but I'm sorry you can relate.

[MachinaWriter]

Powerful. As always, you shed an honest light upon a dark subject. In this case, the light is a spotlight, with the power of a thousand torches. I know too much about how things like this can ruin the lives of those around the person drinking, as well as the drinker. You show courage when you put your life out there for people to see, and I commend you for that. You're very brave. Very strong. As always, I enjoyed reading it and I thank you for sharing this.

[Apatheia]

Thank you so much. It's always nice to hear what you think. Thank you for reading and I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[de_maruf]

nice one

[Apatheia]

Thanks :)

[Ice]

It's sad, yet beutifully written! Keep it up! >.

[Apatheia]

Thank you!

[Ice]

welcome~ :)

[Ees]

It is an interestingly sad piece. It sounds like a suburban tale/movie. It had an almost retro feel to me. I think it told a story and completed it very nicely. Good job!

[Apatheia]

Thanks!

[Steven Cash]

I think its amazing

Sad tho

[Apatheia]

Thank you very much

[Steven Cash]

Np

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Hi Apatheia, It is a good poem depicting the pain and isolation of a child entrapped and isolated in a dysfunctional alcoholic upbringing. I only hope it did not really happen to you.

[Apatheia]

I'm glad you liked it.

[Claire Twinn]

So sad and real, I feel angry for the people who throw away the wonderful gift of a family.
The only part I wonder about is 'he'd talk to the other three', I feel this needs more explaining.

[Apatheia]

Siblings and mother. I didn't really think it much mattered to add them in. I was going to but I decided against it because I didn't know how to.