Adrenaline

This is a short poem that I wrote during a slow day at work. Feedback and advice is welcome! I hope you enjoy. :)

Heart racing

Blood pounding

This is all oh so astounding 

I feel like I could cry

Or maybe even fly

I feel as though I could never die

I am unstoppable 

I am unsinkable 

I can do the unthinkable 

Author's Note

If you have any advice for me please feel free to comment!

Reviews

[Einstein Noodle]

first verse got me going .. i fullfilled a bucket list item by jumping out of an airplane and throwing my chute myself .. caught on camera ;) and the aforementioned verse put me instantly at the open door of that plane .. what a rush!! what a ride!! i understand the rhyming .. just to be aware of a line that one can cross, making the poem a bit trite .. i think the second verse is close to that line :} but of course only one man's opinion .. the last line surprised me!! it has a bit of darkness attached to it somehow .. doing the unthinkable??? hmmmm
i love the minimalist! so nice one from that perspective .. first verse is the strongest in my opinion!
E.

[anonymous]

I see what you mean. Thank you for the advice!

[....................]

This is actually perfect as you capture adrenaline in its purest form. Perhaps you relied on a memory of surfing or of an adventure you had where adrenaline was necessary for you to carry out the task. Whatever your muse you nailed it. Good job!

[anonymous]

Thank you for the feedback! :)