Beyond

You tell me to seek liberation

I tell you that's not what I'll find.

You tell me I need salvation

I tell you that's not on my mind.

I ask you for an exegesis

You say I'm the one with a prejudice

You promise there's more to become

I guarantee I'll never succumb.  

Author's Note

I would love any feedback!

Reviews

[barleygirl]

I had to look up exegesis, too . . . I like it when a writer teaches me new words. I also like that your rhymes are sophisticated not simple. I don't agree with your message, but I get the feeling the narrator is not slamming the door all the way shut . . . I believe he/she just wants to be CONVINCED, rather than following blindly out of obedience. The structure of: "you tell me" . . . "I tell/ask you" . . . this works very well as a creatively stated argument.

[Re-Pete]

This is great. I like this a lot. Sounds like you're saying you'll never be a believer. I like the word exegesis. Never saw that word before - just learned something new. Not sure if you are talking to God directly or a friend trying to convince you to become a believer. You packed a whole lot in. Nice job.