One, Two, Three

Just a fun poem :)

One, two, three, 

I knelt behind the tree.

Blind folded eyes,

crispy vanilla skies.

Hid she in the winds

and I waited with wings.

Four, five, six, 

I broke the jinx.

I held her in trance,

and she fretted in glance.

She met me in the eye

and I felt so high.

I bet, as the moons met,

all we could, was wet and sweat.

Seven, eight, nine

I fell for her in pine.

Strawberry red blush,

Fresh lime gush.

Her rose lined lips

enticed me in trips.

The moment seized

as the passions eased.

She smelled wine

and I slept fine.

And, the count Ten.

Ah, ouch,

Fell out of my slumber Den...

- AH, 03/14/2007 

Author's Note

One of those old writes in those pretty times :D

Reviews

[Marie]

A very romantic play with words in this very lovely fun write, Abhi. Love the rhyming couplet form which the poem takes and the unusual additions of numbers to record each event. Great idea well utilised. The little twist at the end of the poem was not something I foresaw until I cam to ten and discovered you were dreaming and fell out of bed! A very humourous write also! I like this poem very much and enjoyed reading it. Thank you for sharing...

[Abhilash Hegde]

Thank you Marie for this wonderful review. I'm glad you stopped by to read this poem and share your thoughts on it. Appreciate it! Best, Abhi

[Marie]

Most welcome always, Abhi. Very best wishes to you too, Abhi. Bless you always...

[Insight "MH"]

The rhythmic feel was so exquisite and the usage of numbers added a fun feeling to it as well. Well done!

[Abhilash Hegde]

Thank you so much for visiting and reviewing. I'm glad you had fun reading it :)

[Insight "MH"]

You are welcome.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Indeed a fun write mirroring the children's rhyme but with adult content. Tis good to experiment with styles and to use word play and rhyme.

[Abhilash Hegde]

I'm glad you liked it, John. Thank you for reading and reviewing :)

[horizon]

With a touch of romance...

[Abhilash Hegde]

yeah, I wrote this one as a fantasy with all the mush and a bit of romance. More so, I just thought of why not learn counting in a better way .. :P Glad to know you found this cheerful and fun. Thanks much, Horizon! :)

[horizon]

Hee here my pleasure it cheers me up...

[horizon]

That's sooo cheerful...I feel like I am going to learn a poem in which we have to clap our hands and sing it. .so fun and great...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

stop at nine, stop at nine...

hate when we have to wake up from the fantasy...but you surely gave us a good one here...i was with you all the way...

j.

[Abhilash Hegde]

hehe, I wish I could stop at nine :P
Yep, fantasy it is and as you say I too hate, to wake up from it. Nevertheless, it was fun imagining it :) Thanks Jacob for paying a visit. Glad to hear your thoughts on this write!

[Manu]

Reading this piece was really a fun. It was more like a song for me. Flow of this poem is very smooth and rhyming is also good.
Nice work, Abhilash !!
Keep up the good work.

[Abhilash Hegde]

yeah, I too had fun writing it :) Nice to know, you liked this one! Thanks Gorthi.