a dame, a dude, his posse, a sleeping dog, a mission of honor not dinero ...

yagottareadtofindout!

dusting the dust

a dame, a dude, his posse, a sleeping dog, a mission of honor not dinero ...

page 99

"i got a way to make you do as i say little one." so said the dame in navy blue.

"there is no hope for you and your, wayward ways! you will find i can be very persuasive when i choose to be. trust me little one, you are mine, alllllll mine! 

HA,HA,HA! Hee, Hee, HA!"  the villanette spoke in a rather poor imitation of cruella deville. yeah, kinda, sorta, but not really. 

business had been slow since puppy pelts had been outlawed and the full length coat just wasn't what it used to be. flossy, as her friends called her, had changed vocations and was one of the most feared debt collectors for miles around. 

she hated her job but it paid good. she needed the money it provided to help fund her aunt and uncle, who were ex side show barkers for the traveling carnival that came to these parts every once in a while. they wanted to open a chinchilla farm.

she found her way in effort to collect a debt owed by the little one.

now the little one was little, very little. well not really. 5 feet at max, 80 lbs soaking wet, girlish face, quite demeanor and shifty blue eyes that betrayed her. she lived for the shadow, coming out only after dark, not because she was evil. she was an albino, pale as johnny winters ever thought about being, white as the driven snow, white as bread.

but her eyes. they were the true blue of life unbound. a blue so blue, the depth of which was endless like the horizon across the desert plains. a blue truer than the deepest of seas. a blue so intense, many got helplessly lost when looking into them. they were the bluest of blues and held court over those that fell too deep into their depth.

other than that, little one was the local card shark. taking no prisoners at the table. she had  shot a man for making suggestion her dealing was from the bottom. and that she didn't take kindly to.

shot him right between the eyes, dead on center, before many, many witnesses that swore she did so in self defense. she had seen urgent need to call for an open bar and in the end, 

the tab was more than she had and so found herself in need. like now. like right now!

she did as all did when times were tight and the purse strings had no reason to draw. she went to the payday cash loan. signed on the dotted line without reading the fine print and as murphy has done many times past, found yet another target, a victim, more fodder for the cannon.

little one couldn't make repayment. the money man saw fit to call the dame in blue.

little one found herself bound, gagged, humiliated, scared, alone.

she squirmed fearfully expecting the worst of the worst to be felled upon her.

"not so fast dame in blue, there is a change in plans unknown till this very moment" so sayeth the striking dude in calico.

"things are gonna change roun here senorita azul. it is you who will find the lack of hospitality. things are gonnnnnnnaaa change roun here!" 

he said turning so all could see well his striking profile.

"this, this is my better side don't you agree? never mind, it makes no sense to ask of you an honest reply". 

"perhaps this will help persuade your bloated ego". 

he drew forth his trusty side arm and commenced to shoot off her dangling earrings one after the other. 

they were but cheap imitation mother of pearl imports from a third world nation somewhere else, perhaps half way around the world. or maybe south philly? it mattered not.

the dame in navy blue blushed hard as she felt her fear let loose her kidneys and she commenced to pee, literally pee, upon herself. she had lost control. how humiliating! 

spinning quickly she lost footing and fell full frontal into the white picket fence of the all american dream home.

cute it was with 3 beds, 2 1/2 bath, two cars in the garage, a sleeping mongrel dog escaping the heat of the day in the cool of the front porch. and yes, there was a chicken in the pot! 2.5 kids, the oldest in school while the 3rd had yet to make an appearance, it was still in the oven so to speak. 

all this for less than one could imagine, especially since it was the local school marm's and her foolish, most often drunken husband's house. they were quite the story, at least locally, but that is another story in itself. it was quite an accomplishment on $400 a month salary as teachers had yet to unionize. 

it wouldn't happen for who knows how long, if ever?

reeling from her embarrassment, the dame in navy blue desperately attempted composure but failed miserably having let what little pride remained fly right out the door. she pointed off towards the distance and when all heads turned to see, 

she made a silent exit stage left.

the striking dude in calico said 

"my work here is done. mount up my merry men, the world awaits". 

he was after all a rhodes  scholar grad from a highly regarded, ok, not so respected jr college the next county over and had opted for hero rather than teaching drama at the local community college. 

he and his posse that had miraculously appeared, steadied their steeds and clamored their way upon them in preparation of another adventure. 

sitting off kilter because one stirrup was shorter than the other, the striking dude in calico looks to his men and says, 

"Il est temps pour nous de quitter ce village merveilleux et d'être sur notre chemin pour sauver les autres. Nous le faisons pour la fierté pas la récompense. Venez mes amis, allons-y!"

ok, i already said the striking dude in calico was a rhodes scholar and he had studied french. two semesters worth. 

he only spoke in his adopted tongue when it suited his purpose like now.

alright he kinda said, it's time to bust a move and go forth to find others in need so we can use our powers and suave looks to save them. we do it cause we can and not for the profit!

as they sashayed off into the sunset, the glorious sunset, the yellow changed to orange and then a brilliant crimson that caused all to melt in it's undeniable splendor.

oh, that dog sleeping?

the director shouted "CUT! PRINT! see ya bright and early, six maybe sixish or so. get some rest, tomorrow is gonna be one of those days. THANK YOU MY BAND OF THIEVES!"

he had recently received a letter from human resources. 

a complaint was made that he, the director, very seldom if ever thanked his crew for doing the job they were so generously paid. 

oh the thought he had in silence, if only ... if only.

"and don't stay out all night b*****s! GET SOME REST YOU DILBERTS!"

"goddamn, these serial episodes are a pain in the a*s!" he said under his vodka soaked breath.

yeah, he had a drinking problem. problem was, there wasn't enough vodka! and he had tried many a time to drink his way under the table and back again. like so many others before, he resigned himself to be but the second best drunk only after the likes of the school marm's drunken husband who was the calico dude's half, step brother, by marriage. 

his sister had married their neighbor that was the adopted step son of one of the calico dude's compadres that just so happened to have tickets to yesterday's bus. 

it only ran once a week, but it was driven by little one's nephew. 

that is how the school marm's drunken husband was really little one's cousin, by marriage twice removed and was related to the calico dude somewhere down root on the family tree, which was the real reason he showed up to help her.

and yes, he did unbind her but kept the gag in place. 

little one liked to talk and talk up a storm she could. 

one time she actually talked up a storm. 

took out the chicken coop down the road. she thinks it might belong to flossy's aunt and uncle, the one's wanting to start a chinchilla farm.

did ya know that chinchillas don't have an odor? i kid you not, no odor, which is the main reason for wanting to have a chinchilla farm in the first place. other than that, they, flossy's aunt and uncle needed money since the puppy pelt biz has gone by the way.

remember that sleeping dog on the cool front porch of the all american dream home? 

well, it kept sleeping right through all this without once waking. why would it? 

the porch was cool, it was hotter than asphalt on a sunny day out there, he was all alone on this wonderful haven. other than that, he didn't really give a s**t. 

he was but a dog. only cared about licking himself, scratching behind his ears, crapping in the neighbor's lawn and chasing the occasional stray cat. 

he was a dog, nothing more and nothing less ... life was grand!

the crew, this motley crew, made their way out the vast expanse of studio 9, 

and as on cue, broke out in chorus singing their favorite song, 

"i got spurs that jingle, jangle, jingle ... ". 

once again, all was well in movieville, kansas.

chapter 7

the wintry sky was wintry. all was not forgiven. it was the best of times, it was ...