growup? maybe ...

thatsright imold

growup?  maybe ...

it's the little things

making difference

tripping falling

forgetting

i am supposed to be

in my golden years

or so they say

most often 

it has become

what i cannot explain

i find uneasy confusion

where confidence

and attitudes once reigned

my body has gone beyond 

it's intended warranty

the failures of design 

are plenty

my vision is faltering

my decision making 

is no longer sharp

at times i cannot find

my glasses

until i feel them in place

how fuked up is that

like looking for the grocery list 

still in my hand

i don't need

no stinkin list

stumbling bumping into 

that and this

in a back asswards

moment

i miss what i do not have

clarity

confidence

ability to just do

most days suk

some shine

i find greater moment 

enjoyed

cup of coffee

4 am

sleeping one eyed kat

dozing purring feeling 

safe curled in lap

i don't have it so bad

now do i

i just don't wanna grow up