hey

hey

hey

im  not

a failure

a drunk

but not

a failure

a dope smoker

but certainly not

a lost failure

i know where

i might be

and where is that

huh say that again

nope ain't gonna repeat

you should have listened

i do not understand you

you appear out of nowhere

am i pestering you huh

go and sit down

im ready to tell

i'm ready to listen

tell me the story

like you did earlier

a good-hearted story

hey guys come listen

this guy can weave

a story not told

of yesterday and tomorrow

the shakes the tremors

the memories haunt me

we were baby killers

i hate you

i hate me

so so wrong

no excuse none

we did it

baby killers

mother killers

brothers dads

im sorry

so sorry

very sorry

help me

please

Author's Note

many returned without visible scars
but war has a way of working its way into your conscience with memories forever
war kills body and soul
ironically it often takes war to achieve peace

Reviews

[Lydia Shutter]

I had friends who came back from Vietnam seemingly unscathed....till I spent time with them and realized they would never be the same again. Killing another human being....even it means you will survive...is never easy to live with. Your staccato lines are so powerful. Lydi**

[keith]

appreciate that
as much i would like to say i am not affected would be a lie. most of us, all vets, all wars keep much inside ... war is ugly and best keep close
we appear to be doing ok ... we have become hardened and are better than good actors
i vent here and there but some things are best left alone
don't kick the dead dog

[Temperance]

Visible and invisible scars. The visible ones can heal but, it is difficult to heal the invisible scars. I grew up around the military and saw the scarred bodies return to start their healing process. No one can imagine the pain of your actions except your brothers in arms. Your poem is an awareness that those scars still exists. Thank you for sharing soul and pain with us. Very moving.

[keith]

thank you and you are right
all of us have hidden scars we never heal
life is not a bowl of cherries ,,, unless you live in a cherry orchard and then everything is coming up cherries
thanks for the visit

[Cherrie Palmer]

For the dead, war stops, for those who remain: We must offer peace of mind. For the very last battle is self hate.
It is okay to live your life and receive forgiveness.

[keith]

it's easy to forgive, living with the realities is another matter
i know what i did, i accept it
war is a game of fight or die no other choice
only the witness knows the depth of guilts
thanks for your visit and wise comment

[Einstein Noodle]

yes ... war leaves scars on everyone .. it is sad and tragic .. too many warriors can't express what goes on inside them ... so hard to unplug the adrenaline rush ... for some the grief of killing, as your poem states ..and for some the guilt of surviving ... i think our vets would all appreciate the acknowledgement that they do not talk about it much ... it's put to rest for a lot no matter the scars .. scars can mean healing too .. for some reopening them is somewhere they do not want to go... me Da never said a word about it .. those i know from our Viet Nam "War" .. never said much either .. one .. did show me his scar ... God bless us all eh!? :(
E.

[keith]

i came back ... twice
you do not want to meet my scars
no god would allow us to do what we do to others

[Einstein Noodle]

glad you made it sir! we do it to ourselves don't we?! i think God's sorrow is so much that we don't need to .. and have His wondrous help .. not to .. sadly we are a fallen lot .. no doubt .. i wish you well today sir! my rose bushes are starting to come into full bloom and today .. it was my saving joy ;) peace love and flowers .. and fine good dog says i!

[Chris Shaw]

My father in law refused to speak about the war keith. His younger brother died in combat. He wouldn't speak about him either. He buried all the pain and hurt inside, of his time in the forces. Too painful to let it surface. This write of yours will be relatable to many. To veterans and their families alike. So many veterans end up with mental health problems and many end up homeless too. Our government in the UK needs to do more for their welfare. They gave so much.

War has no winners only losers.

Chris

[keith]

we are the forgotten generation the baby killers!
every time i hear someone say "thank you for your service" i reply, save it for those that didn't come back ... the memories never cease
killing others never leaves your thoughts, never
this country is so damn pretentious, we don't really give a damn about anybody or anything unless there is something in it for us
we are a sorry lot we are

thanks for stopping in chris, it is greatly appreciated

[keith]

i remember every one of them! theirs and ours

[Chris Shaw]

The memories of that time must be a permanent nightmare. No one could possibly imagine what it was like unless they were there. I sincerely hope you can find some kind of peace of mind. It was a long time ago. You don't deserve to be tormented for the rest of your life by the past.

[keith]

it's called war for a reason

[keith]

on a lighter note ... no one has mentioned the pattern of my write
one word, two words, three words, four words, five words per line
then four words, three words, two words, one word per line
even in death there can be art in expression
my art is how i deal with my world
i paint, i sculpt, i sit at the potter's wheel, i make furniture, i garden, i raise my meat products

all this is my world that keeps my memories in check ... i will be 72 in a few weeks or so and i know myself better than anyone and i say i will continue on

[Chris Shaw]

It's good you have so many creative interests to keep those memories in check. As to the layout of your words, I can see it now, but to be honest that was lost to me by the power of what you said. You are gonna need a big birthday cake to hold all those candles!

[Chris Shaw]

I will also add that your posted artwork is striking. Standing tall amid the shadow that tries to blot out the sun.

[keith]

i cannot take credit for the image ... it came from my favorite image source PIXABAY
all images are public domain and free to download
their catalogue to larger than one could imagine
i only pair my poem to their resource
glad you liked it ... means i did a good job selecting
thanks chris

[keith]

no cake no candles ... firing up my smoker for some rabbit, quail and guinea hen!
a feast fit for this here king! HA!