Inseparable Worlds

 

 

            It is exciting to know that going to college and entering a university will bring you from a monotonous world to a dynamic one. This perception stuck in my mind long before I graduated in high school. I later realized that aside from literally being expensive, getting a tertiary education and leaving your home equates to bundles of adjustments.

            Transition period easily walked into the scene. In no time, I found myself already between dimensions which are barely separable. It is not merely because of the fact that I am doing my best to strike the balance, but it seems to me that I am a boat sailing on two parallel rivers – home and school.

            I was struck by what I call “overwhelming independence” that I experienced when my first day in college started. This may sound like an exaggeration, but I was so amazed that I almost forgot I had a house in the province.

            It felt like having the control over almost everything. I can pick up anything to read and let my eyes indulge. I have the freedom to talk to anybody, even befriend a stranger in minutes without the hassle of figuring out who that person really is or where that person came from. It is a prerogative whether or not to do things in advance. I can be as outspoken as I can be, yet in some instances I prefer to, silence can be my option. I can even wake up 30 minutes before my first class in the morning. I am away from home – away from what I used to be.

            Parents rule at home, and that is a law. It is so unbreakable that you would only end up feeling bad when you persisted in breaking it.

            As a child, the eldest at that, I am a follower of my parents, and being such does not only limit to genetics. It is more on aspects of orders, in-house rules and regulations, discipline, and motivation. They lead, I follow. It is not military-like, though. The household is managed simply.

            The beds must be neatly fixed right after waking up in the morning. Taking a bath should only be 15 minutes. Apply volunteerism in terms of doing the chores – no need for unnecessary commands. Out-of-home whereabouts, especially the late-night and the out-of-town ones should be subject to parents’ approval.

            Following the rules is a must. Otherwise, mild to moderate clamor will be heard everywhere. Expressions of what should and should not have been done are enumerated. Sometimes, inevitably, overanalysis and false assumptions would arise, leading to disputes.

            Well, I guess, all for our own good. But as a teen-aged person, this was the situation that I wanted to get rid of, even just for 10 hours in a day.

            These situations, plus my uncontrolled impulses, led me to being internally rebellious to the point that I considered the university, literally, as my second home. In school, I don’t notice limitations, though I am acting within, just within, their range. I go to my classes regularly. I do my extra curricular activities and other stuffs – whether smoothly or abruptly, it doesn’t matter. I’m free.

            When I am at home, I have to make and do things as orderly as possible. I have to make an extra effort to maintain the balance inside the house that would last until we breathe our last breaths. I feel obliged. I feel... responsible.

            Later, I realized I was just on the right track. School is school, home is home. I belong in both, and I should be, must be, accountable to that status.

            In my view, the culture of our home coincides with our university’s core values: service, harmony, and excellence.

            At home, you have to be at your best service to your family. You have to take the initiative of finding ways to help them in all aspects of life. You have to do your responsibility, be sensitive enough and most of all, love them with all your heart, to have a harmonious relationship with them. You have to be good as a person to become somebody they could be proud of.

            All the same goes with the university I am in. All the same goes with our family.

            These worlds are not totally different. There are certain points where they unite and function as one. Most of the time, it is on the aspect of preparing you for your unfathomable battle in the arena of the real world – most especially when the arena itself becomes your competitor.

            These worlds, yet, are not totally the same. They work independently in ways that will make you flexible, and later on, apparently invincible. These make living dynamic. This dynamics gives spice to life.

            It feels good to realize all these things.

            One thing that remained in my mind is, no matter how different or similar these worlds - my home and my school - are, the important thing is to maintain the connection intact, guard it against all evil, and rely on it for the meantime until I am ready for my next step.

            That connection, after all, is me.

 

 

 

 

Daryl Z. Lasafin