Death of a Mouse

A bloody children story.....

Death of a Mouse

Baby Kitty swipes with his meaty paw and impales a baby mouse on the ends of his claws. Very carefully, he takes his other paw and gently pushes the mouse off his claws, letting the poor thing fall to the ground in a non moving, crumpled heap. Then he lies down, watching carefully as the baby mouse recovers enough to make an escape. Lying still, knowing the cat is somewhere near, the mouse tries to breathe through punctured lungs, wondering if this really is the end.

Just a few moments ago, the baby mouse was playing with his brothers and sisters under the gigantic redwood trees, everything fine in their mousey world. Thinking idly about raiding the dog food bag again in the garage, the baby mouse notices a large shadow loom slowly over him. Then the black paw with needlepoint razor claws descends and brings the mouse toward the leering face of Baby Kitty. This is the start of a half hour Game of Death; Baby Kitty consciously doing his best to not mortally wound the baby mouse, so he can torture it properly and give the mouse family watching from the bushes a proper introduction to the neighborhood. The little mouse cries in silent fear as he tastes freedom, only to be pulled back into the grips of the black giant. His siblings watch in horror at what they are witnessing but they are helpless to do anything. They also know that they will be next, that there is no stopping this gigantic black cat that seems to catch every movement of their brother, who was the fastest mouse in the family. He constantly beat the others in races to the dog food bowl, easily dodging the lumbering brown Chesapeake, who wails in frustration at these evil little mice who are stealing his food. That was their mistake, to assume that the Chesapeake did not have any friends. Although they have differences sometimes, Baby Kitty and Maxwell the Chesapeake are good buddies, so Maxwell let Baby know about the mouse family that had taken up residence underneath the deck. Besides the food stealing, he hated the family because the parental unit of the family had a major addiction to dandelions, which made poor Max sneeze wickedly often.

“No problem, my big stupid dog friend, I will gladly take of the problem that beseeches you but one day I will call upon you for a favor, which I’m sure you will be able to do easily,” said Baby Kitty to Maxwell the Chesapeake.

The Chesapeake laughed like this was the funniest thing that he had heard all year. He shook his head slowly and said,

“Dumb cat, if you don’t do as I ask, I will alligator you.”

Baby Kitty knew what alligatoring was and although he knew he was much faster than this idiot of a dog, he also knew that the malicious Chesapeake was a sly beast and not to be underestimated. So he smiled at the dog and told him:

“Don’t worry, my friend, I will take care of this for free, since we are such good pals.”

With his tail upright, the black cat made for the redwood trees, where the mouse family was. He had known about these mice the minute they had entered his domain but he had hoped for a little fun before slowly killing every single one of them. Now he had to make an example out of one of them, scaring the others so badly that they would flee in terror to the banks of the Calaveras River.

Baby Kitty understood his purpose in life; the person he knows as Kazinsky taught him as a kitten that mice were to be hunted and killed with extreme prejudice. So his bantering with the Chesapeake was more for show than anything but with the dog’s threat, he must move quickly. That was when he found the baby mouse and began his favorite past time, The Game of Death.

The baby mouse makes a sudden movement, zigging and zagging as he makes a dash for the relative safety of the ivy but the black cat zigs and zags with him. As the mouse reaches the threshold of the ivy, inches away from his mousey mother, the cat flattens him with his paw. No claws this time; Baby Kitty tosses the mouse almost five feet in the air and there is a sickening thud as the baby mouse lands face first into hardpan dirt. He does this over and over. On the final toss, the cat again impales the baby mouse with his wickedly sharp claws and brings the head to his mouth. Grinning an evil smile at the still alive terrified eyes of the mouse, Baby Kitty opens wide and decapitates his victim with a solid crunch.

The entire mouse family gasps in terror and runs for the river but not all them are lucky. What happens next is a mice massacre. A group of fifteen or so mice run for safety but Baby Kitty leaps into the air and lands in the middle of the group. With one swipe of his mighty paws, a mouse is disemboweled and the momentum of the attack knocks down half the group. Another flash of black and three mice are crushed to the ground as a bloody mess. What mice are not killed instantly by the sharp claws face the teeth of this wicked demon, which gleam with blood in the late morning sun.

Some mice escape but the majority our wiped out in the attack and Baby Kitty gathers the bodies of the mice for the ceremonial showing of the mousey victims to the people of the house. He struts to Meow Meow’s grave and drops a corpse on it, giving respect to his mentor and friend. Maxwell the Chesapeake nods his approval, for Meow Meow was a great friend of his and he misses that orange ball of fur deeply. In Kitty Heaven, Meow Meow smiles down at the scene below him, glad that his teachings are still in full effect. He knows he will again see his friends, including his favorite person, the red headed Kazinsky………….

 

Andrew N. Farrens

Stockton, California

September 14, 2010////2:22am

 

Reviews

[Mark]

Ah, the question asked of bullies is 'why?' and the answer is always 'Because I can'.

Good story Andrew, makes me wonder about the setting though.... Redwoods and the Calaveras River; somewhere up by Big Trees? Never visited up there, but that country is beautiful.

[Andrew N. Farrens]

actually, no, this is set in my back-yard in Stockton. The Calaveras runs from Stockton's Deep water channel into the area you are talking about. However, if you know anything about Stockton, it ain't pretty here.....

[Mark]

I lived in Lodi for 25 years and worked on the east side of Stockton, over on Shaw Rd off hwy 99. Know a little bit of your area. :)

[Andrew N. Farrens]

I pity you for possessing such knowledge......lol

[Mark]

heh ya. The downtown area around the water is pretty nice though. Used to love going walking there.

[Dayran]

A bit of the wilds in backyard Stockton. There's always a bit of the wilds ...

[Hester Vane]

Great story. Very unusual but thought provoking.

[gombeggar]

very nice bit here, entertaining to read...some verb tense errors...give it a re-write

[MoriartyMesa]

I found this to be of the nature of the stronger, that and it reminds me of kitten i know.

[s y e]

Hmmmm, for a kids story it is quite disturbing but I guess kids read anything these days, it is a good story line, and I agree with what Mark says about the bullies.

You do have a good story line but another thing I would suggest is maybe splitting it into smaller chapters so kids will actually read it... Up to you, you're the writer.

[quinfinn]

interesting take on the state of things in the human jungle....you had me at Chesapeake, as i used to live in Chesapeake, Va.....well told and unique.

[Gerald Parker]

An interesting story which might be intended to be allegorical? I personally had a small problem with the choice of tenses.

The second paragraph is a flashback which begins in the past tense. I think it would be logical for the whole of this section to continue in the past. This sentence halfway though the overlong second paragraph: ' He constantly beat the others in races to the dog food bowl, easily dodging the lumbering brown Chesapeake, who wails in frustration at these evil little mice who are stealing his food' contains one verb in the past tense and one the present. After that the story continues in the past until the flashback is over.

I wonder if the author should remain impartial and no offer judgements such as 'the poor thing' in the first paragraph. Your tendency to anthropomorphise stretches credibility, in my opinion.

[David Scott]

You wrote well here. Not sure how many children will read this one though...Ha
Alot to read into here. I like how you personify this with your identity of Kazinsky... Still not sure that I believe everything I read on your profile. ;)
Be well.

[Mia]

This is very disturbing, I agree, but also a little bit funny.

[mandy]

i know that cats do this...never looked at it from the mouse's perspective though,,,,i hate cruelty and bullying both. it was a good write.