It's compact and concise, which is good. You deal with some primal symbols, like darkness, silence, sorrow, angst...but maybe you can make the poem more implicit and not explicit? For instance, the first stanza is probably the strongest because you use specific imagery in order to convey the implied feeling - more pathos that way.
The last stanza is the opposite, which is why I think it needs to be reworked - maybe return to the picture/silence/darkness motif?
I see things a little different. When a writer feel disconnected, or lost...it will reflect in their writing, which makes it real. I liked it. I could tell it was from the heart of someone suffering. Rain..
once a fella told me,"time never goes waste, even time wasted is not a waste of a time".
so what will finally be will be something very constructive and worth the pain n watch!!!
ur poem captures the very essence that underlies the human emotions..kudos
It's compact and concise, which is good. You deal with some primal symbols, like darkness, silence, sorrow, angst...but maybe you can make the poem more implicit and not explicit? For instance, the first stanza is probably the strongest because you use specific imagery in order to convey the implied feeling - more pathos that way.
The last stanza is the opposite, which is why I think it needs to be reworked - maybe return to the picture/silence/darkness motif?
Wow! This is greatAnd let me tell you, it is not just "nothing much" because it doesn't seems like random at allYour words are saying a lot and conveying such a powerful message!
A poet first writes from his heart and then from his hands.If there's only pain and sorrow present in the heart then how can anyone write about happiness? The same happens with me
The last line left me numb though! I have no answer for it
this poem is dark & beautiful. the flow is smooth. i especially like "words and emotions are all that remain they soak page after another to keep me from going insane" there are many who feel that way. very good work.
Writing is easy. You only need to stare at a piece of blank paper until your forehead bleeds - Douglas Adams.
I am a woman in my 20's.
I love writing...sometimes it doesn't.. more..