Everytime I think of you

Everytime I think of you

A Poem by Imperfection
"

Acrostic

"

 

  

Remorse envelops my entire being

Every time I think of you

Pictures from the past emerge

Each of your wounds has a sad story to tell

No amount of repentance can undo my loss

The promises that you believed in

Are the ones I’ve broken ruthlessly

Not once did you blame me for your pain

Conscience hurts for your silent tears

Every time I think of you

 

© 2008 Imperfection


Author's Note

Imperfection
Reminds of one of my favorite songs.
"She's always a woman to me"


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Featured Review

This is a gripping piece, but I agree with Valentine...the picture does not do it the justice that another might...Could you try a picture representing sadness? It might be more fitting.

Acrostics are not easy to do, so I applaud you for hammering this out..

So much mixed emotion in this one. There seems to be remorse for this dear ones woundedness, and at the same time an utter disdain towards this person for the loss incurred...an almost murderous revenge towards them. At least, that is what the picture portrays. Sends a strong message. Your choice in font color...BLOOD red! Perfect for what I believe you are trying to portray in this piece.

Appreciate the raw emotion and candidness here...

Well done! Carole



Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

A well written acrostic. Thank you so much for entering it into my contest. Debileah

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is powerful.. truly exceptional. And I like the picture.. its the end result of the pain suffered..

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

A fine poem and well written. I had a problem with the picture did not go with the poem but hey we are talking about the poem. Good job and keep writing. Tony

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I loved this...
"Not once did you blame me for your pain".
Very strong words, the entire poem was awesome.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is a gripping piece, but I agree with Valentine...the picture does not do it the justice that another might...Could you try a picture representing sadness? It might be more fitting.

Acrostics are not easy to do, so I applaud you for hammering this out..

So much mixed emotion in this one. There seems to be remorse for this dear ones woundedness, and at the same time an utter disdain towards this person for the loss incurred...an almost murderous revenge towards them. At least, that is what the picture portrays. Sends a strong message. Your choice in font color...BLOOD red! Perfect for what I believe you are trying to portray in this piece.

Appreciate the raw emotion and candidness here...

Well done! Carole



Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I love the poem but for some reason..the picture just does not set the correct mood one gets from reading this work..and to think....Christ also did this for us and took all of our pain..I wonder how many of us really feel remorseful for each hit or bruise..Nice write..God bless..Valentine

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Nice acrostic.

This piece shows nice emotion and has a nice underlying flow, but it lacks a bit in the rhythm category. I would suggest using punctuation.

This is a piece that I can relate to, but at the same time, it is completely alien to me.

The conclusion was also a bit weak; it left me hanging, wondering "...what more is there to this?"

This is a nice piece, but I think there could be more to it.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I agree - billy Joel works well here. Also one of my favorite songs

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is a very clever, and nicely woven acrostic. ONce can make out the intended word from the phrases alone. A wonderful write. Thank you for sharing

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

The use of the word REPENTANCE... as you put - an acrostic.. is clever. But not only that, the piece results in such a sincere expression of remorse... '... conscience hurts for your silent tears', a sensitive phrase that almost brought tears to my eyes.

You have a very gentle touch with phrases, using simplicity as your tool.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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16 Reviews
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Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on April 18, 2008
Last Updated on April 18, 2008

Author

Imperfection
Imperfection

India



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�Writing is easy. You only need to stare at a piece of blank paper until your forehead bleeds� - Douglas Adams. I am a woman in my 20's. I love writing...sometimes it doesn't.. more..

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