IF ONLY

A Poem by Shweta Sunil

IF ONLY By Shweta Sunil

If only I could see her again

If only I could hear that laughter

If only my eyes fed me

With something other than that crippled body

That lay in front of me, suffering

Yes, I missed her..

Sometimes..I would yearn for that love

Sometimes I would hope to see that spark

She was too young to go

Too young to see life as it was

Every day, every night

My feelings.. They are consumed by regret

Used to remind her of those unfortunate people.. Just like everyone does

Used to tell her to finish her lunch

Used to tell her to make her bed

Used to tell her to switch off the lights

Used to tell her to stop shouting when we fought

But now.. The empty plates

The made-up bed

The lights.. They never are on..

The voice... It now has no soul to enter

I miss those flaws

I miss that love

I miss those times she used to yell

Trying to tell me how she felt

Everything.. It had ended

She had lost the battle

She was away..Far far away

Her soul in a place from where it finds no return

I hope she isn't watching me from up there

I wish she doesn't see those tears

I hope she doesn't see my torn-up soul

I hope she doesn't feel my pain

I hope she doesn't see me suffer, see how I wake up everyday

Hoping to see her beside me

My sister, oh my sister