Messenger

poem by KC writer Joni Wilson aka Amenimity

I broke his heart pretty badly

But everything he says to me

Is forgotten or disregarded

I hate having to do this to someone

And rejection is so hard

Sometimes it cannot be handled

I got very sick of being put down

My things being destroyed

Wondering why I was put into a situation like this

Maybe I was suppose to help him see

That true love does exist

But to be good to it

For it can disappear as easy as it appeared

Some people often forget this

What I remember

His touch

His eyes

His smile

Turned to hate

His soft, smooth back

His neck

His lovely chest

And I’ve turned the other way

The way that’s facing toward success

And all the things I wish for myself

To become

My heart has turned sour

But in a few months

This will probably hurt really badly

I’ve been accused of being a w***e

A b***h

A retard

A c**t

All the things your mother would never want anyone to say to you

I’ve not only listened to the hateful words he’s said

But I’ve absorbed them

I remember good times

But bad usually out ways good

He doesn’t want to let go

I was very good to him

Better then anyone

I have moved on now

I wish the absolute best for him

Each day that I am breathing

He is my soul mate

I just don’t think that I’m his

And as much as he’s says I am

I can sense and feel that I am not

When someone can give up a bad habit

A habit they love

For you

To make you happy

Then they really love you

I’ve given up bad habits for my soul mate

Yet the bad habits still eat his soul

I was brought here to be a messenger

That’s my mission in life

To make other’s see

What they haven’t seen before

I was trying to make him see

Something that he never will understand

How sad this is to me

Happiness is such an emotion worth dying for

At least to me

As I’m walking away

He still stands strong and sad

I always stop to try to get him to go a different way

But he just stands there as if stuck in time

Stuck where I left him

All the beauty I’ve seen in this life

Means nothing without a face

Means nothing without love

Love is a strong and hurtful sting

He was right about one thing

F**k Love

People forget love until love has walked out the door

It hurt’s to know that he hurts so

But life will never be easy

I’ve learned a lot from this experience

Not to get too personal

Not to be too desirable

And not to be me

Because people love me in a harmful way