Recently, I was
accused, on this website, of being both prejudiced and racist. In the first
instance, I made a comment to another writer with regard to my own personal
experience with Schizophrenia. In the other instance, I wrote a sexy love poem
to a former lover, who happened to be Spanish, and who happened to have
introduced me to his mother's delicious homemade gazpacho. I have never tasted
anything quite the same since.
Apparently, we have,
as human beings, have reached a point where we are no longer able to
describefacts or observations that
involve specifics about a particular group of people, without offending
someone.
Really? I have
anxiety, depression, and mild OCD tendencies, I have lived with emotional
abuse, and with people suffering from Schizophrenia and Bi-polar disorders.
Yet, if I try to talk about it, I may inadvertently offend all mental illness
sufferers with my opinion of my own experience.
I had a boyfriend
from Kenya once. Oh no, I guess I shouldn't talk about that either. And
lord knows (oops, Catholic girl, shouldn't
have said that either) I better pull down the dozen or more poems I have
written to my current love, who happens to be Irish. I better root out that old
poem I wrote about my Kiwi love too …
When we, as human
beings, are asked to scrub clean our every thought, our every emotion, our
every experience, we lose our souls.
There is a
difference between being politically aware, not using racial slurs in a hurtful
context rather than a conversation about a racist person, and taking the bite
out of everything you write for the sake of not wanting to offend others …
And on that note,
please, if I genuinely offend YOU, as a person, as a human being, and there is
a real reason behind it, have the courtesy to please private message me, we
will discuss it, and I either will remove or edit my post to reflect that feeling.
I will not, however,
be bullied into restraining my thought. Besides, my international list of loves
is too delicious to censor, and one of the many reasons I find the particular
accusation of racism most offensive and untrue.
An honest write. You can be the juiciest peach in the basket and there's still gonna be someone who doesn't like peaches :) I'm intrigued as to where your current Irish man hails from. We're just back from Saskatchewan - loved Canada and am already pining for the people and pumpkin spiced lattes!
Posted 6 Years Ago
6 Years Ago
As far as Ireland I'd have to ask. We're from Ontario. South and North
Very well-expressed & well-deserved rant. I love your use of examples & sarcasm which doesn't detract from your overall point of view. It just conveys how impossible this all felt to you at the time. In our country (USA) we have become so full of angst & accusation, it's similarly difficult to express oneself without offense. I completely follow the distinction you're making here. I just wrote a LGBTQ poem that was kinda tongue-in-cheek, but I got a review suggesting I'm insensitive to the LGBTQ community. I guess we must just blaze on, telling our own truths, without giving any emotional energy to the ones who perceive ill in our good intentions.
Posted 7 Years Ago
7 Years Ago
Thanks, I really appreciate the understanding. :)
Advertise Here
Want to advertise here? Get started for as little as $5
Like fire, the internet can facilitate either great or horrible things. There are too many examples to count, but the really horrible happening is how it allows people to be really, really mean and disrespectful. I want to say that they'd never act like that in person, but it looks like, for some, at least, their terrible internet behavior is carrying over. And now, there's the Trump effect. (Don't get me started!) I say it's no one's business who you or anyone else decides to court.
I am reading this on just the right day, KL. I posted a cartoon on Facebook the other day with a pharmacist telling a female customer, "your prescription for knowitall has expired, you have to shut up." or something like that. I thought it was cute. I posted it having no one in particular in mind, but certainly we all know people this cartoon could easily apply to. Many people commented that they thought it was cute. However, my nephew commented, "Each post starts with a mirror. You shut up." I replied, "Would you like to elaborate?" When he did not reply, I deleted the entire comment and reply. I private messaged him and asked him what was up. He said I insulted him with that cartoon. I told him it had nothing to do with him and that actually the customer in the pharmacy was a woman. I asked him why he could possibly think it was about him. I did not hear from him and now he has unfriended me and so has his wife. We have reached the boiling point with political correctness and the political divide has made enemies out of family members. I don't get it and I will not sugar coat my humor or plain and simple things I happen to say. So, KL, write what you want...you have never insulted me and I know you never intentionally would. I liked this...empowering. Lydi**
Posted 7 Years Ago
7 Years Ago
So glad you stopped by this piece, Lydia, and so sorry to hear that a family member would somehow th.. read moreSo glad you stopped by this piece, Lydia, and so sorry to hear that a family member would somehow think something as simple as that was about him. I lost a friend whom I held dear at the time to just such a similar incident, by her reading a poem and causing a shitstorm over something that had NOTHING whatsoever to do with her. In this particular instance, I was blindsided twice in succession by a total stranger whom I don't remember ever having even commented on my work. It still makes my blood boil that "My Spanish" could somehow be taken as racist in the love poem I wrote. When asked why it was he/she simply said it was "an interpretation" -- what a load of b.s. If you are going to level such a charge, you should have some logic to back it up.
7 Years Ago
You are right....small minded people. There is an expression in Dutch....if you want to hit a dog, .. read moreYou are right....small minded people. There is an expression in Dutch....if you want to hit a dog, you will find a stick. Some people are looking for problems with anything we post. Stand your ground. Lydi**
Small censorious minds cannot be artists my friend. Small minds cannot reach beyond their own 'correct' opinions. Small minds say oh I've now got a voice and no-one needs to know how small I am because I can remain hidden. So small minds are wrong and you the artist are compassionate and right. Because you wonder about being right.I don't think you could ever be an evangelist for dogma or small behaviour.
Oh and by the way the black dog you suffer from means you could never have a small mind that is always 'right' in a small minded world. And there I talk from my own experience.
A real champion of the soul KL. You will always be loved here!
Regards,
Al
Posted 7 Years Ago
7 Years Ago
No worries, no intention of fleeing the place or anything -- just want people to realise that what t.. read moreNo worries, no intention of fleeing the place or anything -- just want people to realise that what they say matters, and how they say it, and why they say it -- and you can't call a person out as racist or prejudiced without a rational explanation.
Thanks. I like to be loved, but I also appreciate being understood.:)
7 Years Ago
well.... like you say ..that can be a frustrating thing ..i personally, am quite disenchanted by the.. read morewell.... like you say ..that can be a frustrating thing ..i personally, am quite disenchanted by the alleged correctness thing .. who gave "them" the sole proprietorship of the word anyway?? not me!
poetry has to be read with an open mind lest one misses so much that lay in creative expression .. i think i have read just about every poem you have posted here ..and the collective soup of biting satire, lusty sex, poetic eruptions (in my opinion) be construed as racist nor prejudicial ... i guess we all do take a risk in revealing ourselves .. even when cloaked in metaphor, personifications etc. .. but that's also what lends us the freedom to "be ourselves" ... and opens doors to not be understood ...ahhhh bitter sweet life that licks our lips ;)) did i say i like you a lot!? ;)
first off, there is NOTHING WRONG with being politically correct, why would anyone want to be politically incorrect....
having said this, there has been a movement of backward people who think that they have the right to be racist, homophobic, etc etc (like Trump's all Mexicans are criminal and rapists)... you know the ones who have "alternative facts"...
and having said this, it is very difficult to not be influenced by the ugliness in modern society and it also something we should all do our best to overcome....
and having said this, KL you are one of the most open and honest person I know and RESPECT and feel confident in saying are NOT racist or prejudice in your views toward people of all flavors and colors and ethnic diversity...
it is an ugly fact of today's world, that political correctness is under attack by very backward and reactionary people and views... and even what PC is, is also hotly debated.... and some people who are very ignorant have the loudest mouths.... even at poetry sites...
redzone
Posted 7 Years Ago
7 Years Ago
The soft th upon my tongue. Read it and tell me in what way that poem is racist.
okay, but I hope you do not think I am saying your poem is....
7 Years Ago
What I am saying is that some people go very far off course to be racially sensitive to the point wh.. read moreWhat I am saying is that some people go very far off course to be racially sensitive to the point where it is not correct to say My Spanish as a term of endearment
7 Years Ago
and I agree with both.. far off course and MY Spanish as a term of endearment... your poem is person.. read moreand I agree with both.. far off course and MY Spanish as a term of endearment... your poem is personal and reflective and wonderfully passionate.... this essay is well said and part of much needed conversations among people...
I must admit. I was hurt when you told me i wasn't the only poet in your life. Apart from that, i'm cool.
Plus, i like offensive poetry. Good catholic girl.
Posted 7 Years Ago
7 Years Ago
ha ha. The offense wasn't even offensive. Thanks. Everyone knows we Catholic Girls are easy.:)
I write under a pseudonym.
I don't do Read Requests, but you can PM me if you want me to read something specific. I make friends with people who I read and interact with. I won't accept random reque.. more..