Most interestingly, when I looked up images of yelling in ear, all of them that
came up were the woman, yelling at the man. Only one was a man yelling
at the woman.
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Thanks, yes. Oddly, there were only two modes for several years -- yelling and silence. Both were in.. read moreThanks, yes. Oddly, there were only two modes for several years -- yelling and silence. Both were intolerable.
Sometimes silence can mean more than words... It's a very truthful write, I have not been in a situation or relationship like that but I can understand the burden it can bring... "when words unspoken/fill up the air/there isn't any room/ for the people living there" very well observed and said...
We do say alot with our demeanor. I met a brother in law last week whose silence so put me off i cut short my vacation and came home to get away from him
Nice to hear from you. And sorry to hear that. That is exactly how my ex treated my family.
8 Years Ago
I couldnt believe this guy for years my wifes family had made excuses for his behavior But with me I.. read moreI couldnt believe this guy for years my wifes family had made excuses for his behavior But with me I made it quite plain this is not alright. His actions and demeanor just told everyone he didnt want you around
8 Years Ago
I am glad you stood up for yourself. My ex was literally unbearable to be around. I always went out .. read moreI am glad you stood up for yourself. My ex was literally unbearable to be around. I always went out of the house without him, because he made everyone so uncomfortable with the way he acted.
I don't think many realize how much they show without saying a word.
Sidenote. To this day, a man is shown as stoic, while the woman is emotional. Images don't always share the real world.
I guess I know a lot of people who use the silent treatment as a weapon. It isn't a good thing.
8 Years Ago
It isn't. I can give an incredible deathstare. At the same time, if I don't speak up, people wonde.. read moreIt isn't. I can give an incredible deathstare. At the same time, if I don't speak up, people wonder if there is something wrong.
It is not just the silent treatment. It is the body language.
yes, i can absolutely relate. i think i have been on the giving and receiving end of this once upon a time.
so much said without a word uttered yet those actions, glances, snickers - they speak volumes.
Yes, you are right. Of course, I think it depends on the length of time and if it is routinely used .. read moreYes, you are right. Of course, I think it depends on the length of time and if it is routinely used as a weapon or a method of control.
that silence is judgment and separation...we learn it from those who inflict it...a habit that becomes second nature...so hard to return to the place of friendship, acceptance, love...it's a chemistry that permeates our soul, and once allowed passes at a habitual pace...i remember weeks of distrust...somehow, those of us who escape the clutches of this distress have to learn to cut it off at the gate...no entrance
thank you for bringing up this subject...many of us, i'm sure can relate
Thank you for your thoughtful comment. Yes, inside the silence grows something insidious, and it dwa.. read moreThank you for your thoughtful comment. Yes, inside the silence grows something insidious, and it dwarfs all else in the relationship.
I'm guilty . . . when I can't say something nice, I say nothing at all, which can be a distinct commentary, I'm sure! You've expressed how this feels on the receiving end . . . especially your last stanza is powerfully stated, when such a silence occupies the same space as the person on the receiving end. I think this is one major reason I haven't been in a relationship in decades . . . *sigh!*
Recognizing it is half the battle. I actually lived like this for nearly three years. For a person l.. read moreRecognizing it is half the battle. I actually lived like this for nearly three years. For a person like me, it's lucky it didn't drive me completely nuts. The silent treatment should have a time limit -- definitely not exceeding a few hours. :) Thank you for understanding.
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