lessons clear and useful

10 words I give - May challenge

The two of us set out to forge
a new day --
but the tax on us was too steep;
neither could pay --
and your profuse use of poetry
could not disguise
your need to screw me
with every measly lie
my heart would break
a little more ...
and a daughter learns
a lesson useful,
but clear --
there were
better ways to discover ...
I do,
doesn't mean
I own.

Author's Note

the challenge was to use these words -- preferably in order -- I did, in reverse.
C L E A R, U S E F U L, D A U G H T E R, B R E A K, M E A S L Y, S C R E W, P R O F U S E,
T A X, F O R G E, T W O

Reviews

[Kenneth The Poet]

Interesting set of thoughts. How do I summarize this? Like a conversation between an ex and you and how you really wish it was said.

[Lyn Anderson]

Luckily for me, I did get to tell him. Just before he left, thinking he had a chance to win me back, he let me let him have it.

[LastMonth]

Man your writing is sometimes hard to swallow.
And I mean that in the best way.

[Lyn Anderson]

Well thank you, I mean that.

[barleygirl]

WOW! This definitely kills it. I'm beyond words. You KNOW how much I relate to this! ((((HUGS)))) Doesn't it feel awesome to get that toxic stuff on the outside?

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you so much. It was a tough one, but I like challenges.

[Wicahpi]

Nice write and interesting use of given words. The given order is of no importance, but interesting that you chose to go backwards. Great! A fighter :) Nothing wrong with going against the grain. In fact, it's refreshing. Thank you for entering 10 Words I Give contest. I'm glad it was a challenge!

[Lyn Anderson]

Thanks. I like a challenge, and this particular set of words definitely stretched me. :)

[Wicahpi]

That is why I like the contest. I, too, attempt to write for this contest just to 'stretch' as you put it. It's definitely a challenge. I think we all win by trying! :) Blessings

[Matching Socks]

Whoa... You dug in hard. The past creeped into the one big time.
Excellent work, but it always is...

[Lyn Anderson]

Thanks. I found this set of words particularly challenging to not come off glib and snarky. I definitely hit delete a lot on this one. (At least I didn't have to kill a tree like I did in the old days):)

[Matching Socks]

Yeah, I bet your waste basket was a mess.

[Lyn Anderson]

oh my gosh, I remember crumpling paper after paper -- my parents used to buy me craft rolls, lol.:)

[Shimmerbliss/CAF]

You have mastered the challenge, my friend! I do love the way you pair the video with your writing...makes the stop by the page an experience. I do relate to the difference you write...many think "I do" does make someone a possession. Sometimes, it doesn't even have to be a marriage...sometimes, just the words "I love you" can be taken as a sacrificial offering and misunderstood. Don't mean to get cryptic, but you have once again taken me on a memory and sensory trip.

[Lyn Anderson]

Yes, well I definitely pulled this one from memory -- that's where the words took me. It was a hard group of words to not come off mean and petty. It took me a couple tries to get something I was happy with. Thanks for reading and reviewing.