I agree dear Lyn. Love should have a happy ending. I liked the flow of thoughts leading to the proper ending. Thank you for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
Thank you so much. I liked coming back to this one
Interesting and entertaining take on the topic. Many good lines in here, I enjoyed reading though I feel the first stanza reads a tad off, somehow. I seems to me, it differs from the others regarding use of words and flow. Other than that, well done and enjoyable as so often :)
Posted 8 Years Ago
8 Years Ago
Ah yes, a glitch in conversion from phone to tablet, you are right, just needs a shuffle.
It reads awesome now, smooth and flowing. Stanzas 6-8 my abs favs :) I like the words "but let me te.. read moreIt reads awesome now, smooth and flowing. Stanzas 6-8 my abs favs :) I like the words "but let me tell you baby,...". I don't even know why, it just reads so well. :)
8 Years Ago
Thanks for the help -- I saw it as soon as you pointed it out.
A great write. Using Fairy-tales (with the famous first line and the mention of prince charming as a toad) has worked extremely well here, especially as you disagree with the 'love' depicted in most fairy-tales and countered it with your own version of what love really is - sharing your heart, not simply giving it up. Simply superb. And I wholeheartedly agree with you; true love is sharing your life with someone who feels the exact same way about you and who offers their heart as you offer yours...
Posted 8 Years Ago
8 Years Ago
Thank you so much, this is one of my recent favourites, I do appreciate.
the beginning lines have an ingenious twist - starting at the end - having hindsight over love - which made me sad - because it sounds like the relationship has been doomed to end from the beginning - i like the word 'interloper', your way of introducing a third character to 'our tale' - let's call him the 'Marlboro Man' on his horse - prince charming, usually doesn't come as a prince with all that trappings - but more as a regular guy from around the corner - you are right - love takes hard work, not always relying on the capriciousness of feelings - you couldn't breathe anymore, because perfection simply doesn't exist in relationships, and you lose the parts that add up to who you really are
i appreciate this gesture, so much - love the brainstorming with you - i'm glad you wrote this poem - thank you, always, KL
my best to you,
steph
Posted 8 Years Ago
8 Years Ago
Ah hon, it isn't sad at all -- it's all in how you interpret ends and beginnings -- sometimes you ge.. read moreAh hon, it isn't sad at all -- it's all in how you interpret ends and beginnings -- sometimes you get to know someone personally after you get to know someone intimately -- it doesn't mean it's doomed -- just means it didn't start by pretending to be something we're not and getting to know all our faults last.
This is such a well penned write. Lovely to say in the least. Now how many would write something about being happy with how their love life is like this? I wanted to choose my favourite lines here, but guess what I like all of them. The first verse and the last verse are too good. Yeah definitely understandable how letterhead would have inspired you. She is an awesome writer ^^
I write under a pseudonym.
I don't do Read Requests, but you can PM me if you want me to read something specific. I make friends with people who I read and interact with. I won't accept random reque.. more..