paper tigers and long dead dragons

demons have a way of coming back

I hate the drama
of calling it
trauma
or admitting to myself
that I am afraid
of paper tigers 

and long dead
dragons...
how many times 

do I have to tell myself 

the leash
you have on 

me is

all in my head?

you pull the trigger,
and for a split second
I vacillate,
hesitate,
want to ...
capitulate,
feel the bullet sink in,
slide so sweetly
under 

my bruised skin --
just let you in,
to teach me
a lesson 

or two.

that paper tiger

is burned

with all 

I have

learned

the dragon

is slain ...

along 

with your 

name --

that's not who

I am anymore,

and I won't

let you.

Author's Note

Coming to terms with the end of an abusive relationship

Reviews

[icelandicblue]

You tell much in this poem. It has an almost conversational cadence of resolve. The two line held a tremendous amount of power. I have a family member in an abusive situation and no amount of logic or pleading has changed her mind, she always goes back. I hope someday she can walk away forever like you've done in this poem.

[Lyn Anderson]

I hope so too. If you think it might help, feel free to share any of my stories or poems. Private message and I can send the links.

[DJ]

A great piece illustrating the unreality one accepts as normal,until catharsis shows it to be anything but normal,nicely done.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you very much, I appreciate it.

[m.s.early]

This is the most natural flow I think I've ever read. It has the quality of rhyming even when it doesn't. I've never been drawn to the conclusion like I was with this. Great work KL. :)

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you. It came straight from me, I guess that's why it worked.

[therisa]

KL, this poem of yours, could have been written, about my own abusive relationship, I have with members of my own family, over the years. And so glad, you found the strength and courage, to look after yourself. I wish, I had done so, when I was a teenager, instead of, waiting 5 years, when I left for university. Thank you, for sharing this very powerful and encouraging poem, with us.

[Lyn Anderson]

Well, it took me the better part of 10 years, so it certainly wasn't overnight, but thank you. Leaving any abusive relationship is never easy. Anyone who thinks it is hasn't lived it.

[therisa]

I know, and applaud your actions. Hoping life is treating you, the way it should, as a woman of value and substance.

[Lydia Shutter]

YES! I love the empowerment in this one. It's difficult to change old habits, but for self-preservation, it is necessary. The imagery you employ is tangible. The bullet will not sink in anymore....because you know you are worth far more than that. Great write. Lydi**

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you so much, I appreciate it. These things I need to say to myself, and to the world, for affirmation.

[realmwriter]

THIS IS AWESOME. I take it you wrote it from this song. One my favorites from Nickelback. The images this pops into my mind are so vivid. And that last line, that is triumph. Really good write and spot on.

[Lyn Anderson]

Read my own note by way of explanation. I used the song because it fit. Thank you for reading:)

[realmwriter]

I love it, You are very welcome.

[Rose Kite]

Life lessons learned can be the loam of tomorrows fruitful wisdom, better choices and possible flowers of real joy. Thank you for- the flow of emotions and growth made visible.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you for the review. Yes, it is important to out the truth and deal with it head on.

[Rene Salinas]

The cycles of relationships. Once the imprint is made it is truly very difficult to deal with the enclosed area left. As it was inhabited by something familiar eveytime we are met with it again we resort to what we thought it was goood and acceptable at the time only to realize that expereinces cannot be rcreated and so come to the conclusion that something has come to an end.

Moving on swiftly then

Thankyou

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you for your review, moving on indeed.

[redzone]

most people do not understand the depth of the problem, how its affects to one being abused, how it leaves deep scars but on the inside even deeper... while I do think it is possible to over come this pain and desolation, I think they are also always there, just waiting to rear their ugly head... KL my heart is with you in a struggle for your heart and becoming a whole human being, always remember you are better and stronger than you believe you are....

as for the poem, amazing that you can articulate this so artistically, I think all I could do would be to scream inarticually, while you scream strength and determination...
~~redzone

[Lyn Anderson]

thank you so much for your kind review. I think, it took a long time for me to articulate it. About 7 years.

[Bright Ocean Star]

Gird the loins and batten the hatches! Heat the oil and light the thatches...let them fly. He is a bully that needs to be beaten back like an army bent on storming the keep. I am so glad you are free. Don't lose your resolve. We believe in you...:) Great write, again. :)

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you, no worries, that door is closed. It's more the pull and push now of letting the crap into my head, and letting me be used over the kids. I have resisted, and will continue to do so.