random sketches in my head

another collection

past due

a dream
mountains of papers
stacked to the ceiling
hoarding bills
and promises
past due

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the aftertaste

i ate my pain
for so long
i forgot what it
was like to live
without the
bitter
taste
of
you.

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       puddles

she stares at the urine
puddled on the floor
she tries to wipe it up,
but it doesn't hide so well
the stains linger in the cracks
along with the smell.

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i see cloudbusting

i forgot more
people
places
things
that i loved
even the good times
with you,
trying to bury
your
mean.

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Author's Note

I picked this song because I loved it forever until I blanked things out
captcha ASYSTOLE (no cardiac activity)

Reviews

[Angad Waraich]

I Loved the second and the first one caught my imagination too.
Well done.
Thank you for sharing

[Lyn Anderson]

Thanks for popping in

[Coyote Poetry]

I liked the four poem. The second poem was my favorite. I like short poetry. We can catch the modest reader and hold them for a second. Thank you dear friend for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Lyn Anderson]

It seems a resounding consensus the second is a favourite. I think Rene is right though, in this way, I have recovered my style, and I need to compile my works this way -- it is the way I have always written, many thoughts scattered across a page -- only recently have I opted to keep them together instead of peeling them apart. I owe this place a lot, my writing has grown, in the company of great writers like yourself.

[Coyote Poetry]

We teach each other. Renee gave me a few lines yesterdays. We need to read to make our writing better.

[Sami Khalil]

Your creativity is endless. A great collection of small poems....:).......

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you, I appreciate it.

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome...:)......

[icelandicblue]

This is a really strong collection of poems. I was particularly struck by Aftertaste. I like this grouping it creates a very edgy mood.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thanks very much.

[redzone]

KL, sometimes I can't sleep at night thinking about the horrors of pain we do to each other. How the suffering and abuse is so aimed at women by those that are or claim to be their lovers or loved ones. And how this is so unnecessary.. your poem, so filled with this pain, and burried anger,, it's hard to describe the feelings you invoke...

Each of these "sketches" could stand alone and be powerful, thought provoking, wonderful, but together spaced as they are incite even more. The Kate Bush song was a surprise for me until I read the line above "I loved it forever until I blanked things out"... in this sense these are hardly "random"... loved this piece
~~redzone

[Lyn Anderson]

Thanks. I don't know when it occured to me, perhaps a few weeks ago, that I have literally avoided things and songs I once loved, without even being aware I had. It means a lot that you understand.

[redzone]

It was 15 years before I could listen to any song from Carol King's Tapestry album. But it was guilt that kept me away. A loud mouth and arrogance, thinking you are always right, not even bothering to listen, all these are abuse and do great harm in keeping a woman down. We (men) are taught to be this way. Oh we do have choices but then everyone says you are weak, sissified, etc until you conform...

The best I can say is that once I understood this, my life has been dedicated to ending this and all oppression, everywhere.... funny, but in many ways, this has become a journey to be more human.

Your poem, it's expressions, reminded me of these things, thank you KL.

[Lyn Anderson]

Wow, thank you so much. That means a lot.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Interesting little tit bits. There is a 'w' missing from 'was' in aftertaste.

[Lyn Anderson]

Yes thanks I appreciate that and I would never have seen it as I read the W in

[Bright Ocean Star]

First of all, I like the small bursts of sketches that you joined together to make this one. It was liked playing with pieces of a puzzle, and I love puzzles. In the Aftertaste, I think you meant "I forgot what it is like to live"...but instead of 'is' you put 'as'...just a minor typo. Spellcheck wouldn't have caught it. I loved the music and the video you paired with this one. I thought it was brilliant to use the puddle of urine as a visual description of the disgusting nature of that relationship, because often odors/smells stay with us in our memory banks the longest. Great write, KLG! Beautiful combination!

[Lyn Anderson]

Thanks for picking that up, hard to catch those ones. Thanks. It's the way I think. In sequential strings

[Rene Salinas]

It is amazing to see the effect that poeple can have upon us. It doesn't matter how strong you think you are , in a relationship no one gets out unharmed. Love is cruel that way. I have confessed many times that abstractions is my favorite way to communicate. I like connecting the dots so to speak although sometimes I get it completely wrong. The puddles was such a strong image, the stains and the smell, stench even in some cases. It is time to reduce everything to ashes and turn a new leaf.

Thankyou

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you for such an insightful review, again. I had these stored on paper, in my head, and on my phone, waiting for the chance to pour them out.

[Rene Salinas]

Well I think that practice might eventually lead to a style KL refinement and what not even when the wrong conclusion are imposed on the writing the journey is unlike anything I have read. Please do continue....

[Lyn Anderson]

This is, in fact, a reversion to my initial style of writing. I always wrote this way, and then dissected the poems apart. I now leave them together. I am not sure how many of these I have posted, as this site is awful for organizing. I was going to try the book Chapter thing, but with 79 pages, it seems an arduous task.

[Rene Salinas]

Oh KL arm yourself with patience one day some wine and do the book with chapters I promise I will review the whole thing I for once would love it. In your own time though....