My Betrayal CV

I wrote this as an example for my contest I am running. deadline Sept 30, enter now! http://www.writerscafe.org/contests/Your-Best-Betrayal-CV/50447/

Dear Sir,

I have a lot of
experience
with betrayal.
I feel I am eminently
qualified for
the position
of head doormat:

Here is my Betrayal CV:

Special skills:

Practical applications 
for anger management
excellent at ducking,
and withstanding
long periods of
antagonistic silences.

Able to negotiate
the ups and downs
of friendships
gone awry, and accept
multiple apologies
into infinity.

I have a finely tuned B.S. metre,
and am able to apply
it to many situations
-- most recently useful
in detecting deceit in
persons who profess prowess in poetry

I hope to hear from you soon,
I am able to start immediately,
I have not been a doormat
for a while and am anxious
to resume my position.

Sincerely,
KL Goode.

Author's Note

In case you didn't read description
I wrote this as an example for my contest I am running. deadline Sept 30,
enter now! http://www.writerscafe.org/contests/Your-Best-Betrayal-CV/50447/
Stretch yourself and have fun.

Reviews

[Ruth]

Ah, missed you reading you hon, glad I grabbed time to delve into WC world this evening, you never fail to stir me ♥

[Lyn Anderson]

Aww thanks. I love reading you too.

[ANM]

Doormats have a nasty habit of tripping you up in the end!!!! Well written !!!

[Lyn Anderson]

Sorry I missed this review thanks

[ANM]

No problem!

[kublakhan27]

Boy do I relate to this one...it's a tough one to review though cuz the tone is so wry that it kind of demands wry observations, but I don't want to be wry with it because I sympathize with it too deeply...being a doormat is no fun, and it just seems like some people are destined to be burdened with that role...'resuming' the position doesn't apply to me cuz I've been feeling like a doormat here for quite a while now...this piece tells me that we handle these situations very similarly, especially the apology part...I get really tired of being an apologist for things I shouldn't have to apologize for, but that's me, or maybe that's just the Canadian in us haha...

[Lyn Anderson]

It could be. I hope you enter the contest in the notes and description.

[kublakhan27]

I'll have to look and see if I have anything that fits the bill.

[Leslie Philibert]

A bitter, clever write that will attract other writes ; fine job

[Lyn Anderson]

Thanks, I hope you will join the contest. I thought you would be good at it and that is why I sent it.

[Bright Ocean Star]

This is funny, KLG! "Be careful about what you wish for", as they always say....Love the satire!

[Lyn Anderson]

Yes, make sure and enter the contest. Deadline Sept 30

[Bright Ocean Star]

What contest?

[Lyn Anderson]

The one posted on this poem in the note and description:)

[Bright Ocean Star]

oops! Sorry. I must have just jumped over that note. I'll see what I can do...:)

[Nusquam Esse]

Quite the satirical piece on this one, honestly... this is what most applications for promotions feel like! Hah, I am terrible at that aspect; I make a terrible doormat, much too lumpy, and always very vocal about the situation... sometimes I will even throw myself on top the person who walked on me... so unfortunately, there are no openings for a doormat such as I... :)

[Lyn Anderson]

Now you must have a good one of these in you. Enter the contest (on notes and description on this poem) closes Sept 30.

[Einstein Noodle]

enjoyed the satirical laugh you provide .. lots of positions filled already but room for many more i am sure ... i think you have really stepped out of yourself to write this .. nice job says i!
E.

[Lyn Anderson]

Please enter the contest I have created, I would love to see your take on it. It is posted here in note and in description.

[Einstein Noodle]

i am shy ... but intrigued and love a challenge .. so will give it a go .. i think this will not be easy for me at all .. thank you ;)

[Ashira Macy]

Haha, this was a funny one for sure. My application was a lot different than this, but either way I hope you enjoy it. I liked the satire in this, I thought it was a lot of fun.

[Lyn Anderson]

Yes I refrain from comment on entries until the contest is concluded.

[Ashira Macy]

No worries, I have the same policy. =)

[Delmar Cooper]

Took me a context read to understand CV was Curriculum Vitae or resume. Of course I then had to look up the spelling. I go to a lot of trouble to read your stuff, you know? You will probably get at least an interview with this CV. But you will probably blow it if they read that other poem you wrote about whose cooze gets the screws. I notice you didn't invite me to read that one. Anyhoo, I thought this was clever and funny in a sad way.

[Lyn Anderson]

I sent an RR for this one because I want you to enter the contest, silly. I didn't send the RR because I rarely can get the boogers to work. For some reason, they worked for this one.

[Delmar Cooper]

Oh, I get it now. I really liked the nasty poem a lot better. And while we are on the subject whatchca doin this weekend? Just kidding, my proctologist would have a fit.

[Lyn Anderson]

ha ha I almost didn't catch that. Whew. :)