putting it away -- for now

Kara looks back and closes the book for now

She honestly never knew she was abused. She just dealt. She did not have any black eyes, or any scars you could see. There are scars only on the inside. She needs to know now she did the best she could with the tools she had at the time. She was not stupid or weak. She functioned because she had to, and now she needs to find a way to grieve the part of herself she lost, forgive her and move on. She talks to a friend, her mom, and she tells some of it to her counsellor. She opens a box. She puts the worst of it away. She writes a poem. She closes the book for now. Until she is strong enough again.

I need to go back and tell her
everything is going to be all right.
I need to let her know it won't be
like this forever
and in a few thousand days there
will never be another night
like the few thousand before.
I need to go back and tell her
it's going to be okay.
I need to hug her
forgive her
and let her go.
she isn't now and never was
a c**t b***h lying fat cow stupid ugly w***e
she isn't now and never was
and won't be any more.

Reviews

[s y e]

This is so deep... One that many will be able to relate to, letting go can be hard but it's what we need to do sometimes. This is going to touch many people, KL.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you. So much. Yes, this is from a very dark place.

[Ghost of Jupiter]

ohhhh wow... yeah, don't think I can comment in depth on this one with out tearing up... this was a heartbreakingly powerful write! Absolutely fantastic and going into my favorites. You never cease to amaze me with your talent, KL... wow.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you so much. It comes from a very raw place.

[Chris]

Letting go always seems to last well beyond midnights...you notice that too?

[Lyn Anderson]

Yes, it does. Stop by for coffee, the internet has a nasty way of interrupting such things at times.

[Chris]

coffee is a good idea

[jane7z]

This was powerful and raw. Thank you for moving me with your words and being vulnerable.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you for stopping by. And yes, this is probably the hardest thing I ever published.

[Vidya Bacchus]

This brought tears to my eyes Kit Kat.Emotional abuse is every bit as bad as physical abuse.The only difference is the scars are invisible and the wounds are still raw.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you so much.

[Vidya Bacchus]

You are welcome :)

[Madalyn Beck]

BEAUTIFUL. Strong and powerful and emotional. The strength she has is lingering deep in her soul. The emotions she carries need time to turn to scars and slowly fade into the background. This is stunning. This is the most powerful piece I have read from you. Fantastic, KL. xo (:

[Lyn Anderson]

When it comes from a very emotional place, it shows. Thank you.

[Tom]

Low self esteem is a confidence sapping, demoralising human emotion and requires assuaging through understanding company!

A profoundly, powerful piece of poetry!

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you so much for your support.

[Laura Harrison]

It's awful when someone you know has to go through something like this. My cousin was recently admitted to a psychiatric hospital for self-harm and it broke my heart. This is a very deep and powerful piece.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you so much for your review, and your kind words.

[Bowers]

a very deep poem here, power seeps through your words... My heart aches for this woman

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you so much. Yes, it has been hard. My heart aches for her too.

[ron]

A very powerful poem Kl. No she never was any of those horrible vile names. No one ever is.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thanks Ron, I am just now getting back to reading writing and reviewing. I will catch up soon.

[ron]

Your welcome Kl. I know your very busy, no worries :) xoxoxo