What if

What if

A Poem by Amanda Moubarak
"

We always say "what if" to something. Something we hoped we could've had. Something we wanted to do or say but couldn't. A love experience that couldn't happen because of being scared.

"
What if we had all the world to ourselves
What if none of us get left on the shelf
What if we own everything and not worry about wealth
Will you be able to love me then?

What if we had only one more night
And the stars were shining too bright
What if there's no more demons to fight
Will you stay beside me then?

What if all of our past get erased
And the futur is not to be chased
What if we have just this moment to taste
Will you spend it with me then?

What if what we ask for is what we get
And there's no more bad memories to forget
What if we get to witness one more sunset
Will you watch it with me then?

© 2017 Amanda Moubarak


Author's Note

Amanda Moubarak
What if you had one more chance, would you take it?

My Review

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Featured Review

I like the premise of "What if" in the context of what appears to be unrealized fantasies and self-doubt. I get the impression these lines represent moments or thoughts that remained unspoken. Sometimes, a "what if" is just a matter of having the courage to take that first step out of the boat. Your poem definitely hit a chord with me regarding moments that never realized fruition because I chose to remain in my shell. I especially liked your third quatrain. However, I can't help but wonder if your thoughts would've been more complete if not confined to a specific rhyme scheme; which, is not to say I didn't enjoy your poem. It just left me wondering if there's more.



Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Amanda Moubarak

7 Years Ago

Yes excatly. I too lost a lot of opportinities becuase i was too afraid. I'm very honored that you c.. read more



Reviews

Amanda, You are going to think me presumptuous but I have reworked your lovely poem just a tad. Your "What if..." concept is great but inconsistent as a couple of your lines start with 'and'. I have made all of the first three lines start with 'What if" & evened out the metre. Actually I have only changed one line significantly and that is in the last stanza. I hope that you will still talk to me in the future. 🐳

What if we had all the world to ourselves
What if none were left on the shelf
What if we need never worry ‘bout wealth
Will you be able to love me then?

What if we had only one more night
What if the stars shone a wee bit too bright
What if there's no more demons to fight
Will you stay beside me then?

What if all of our past gets erased
What if the future can never be chased
What if we have just this moment to taste
Will you spend it with me then?

What if we ask, and that’s what we get
What if there's nought to regret
What if we see just one more sunset
Will you watch it with me then?


Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Amanda Moubarak

7 Years Ago

Hahaha noo i like your version :) thank you for that ! Thank you for reading and i think it meant so.. read more
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NEY
I love the 3rd paragraph! The line 'What if we have just this moment to taste' is beautiful!
A very nice sweet poem you got there!

In the second paragraph, if the starts were 'too' bright, wouldn't that be bad? xD You could possibly change it to: 'oh so'.
'And the stars were shinning oh so bright'?
What do you think? :)

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

NEY

7 Years Ago

I meant to say in the 3rd line 'stars' NOT 'starts' xD
Amanda Moubarak

7 Years Ago

Thank youu ! Glad you liked it :) yes you are right, very good remark, thank you for that 😊😊 i.. read more
I like the premise of "What if" in the context of what appears to be unrealized fantasies and self-doubt. I get the impression these lines represent moments or thoughts that remained unspoken. Sometimes, a "what if" is just a matter of having the courage to take that first step out of the boat. Your poem definitely hit a chord with me regarding moments that never realized fruition because I chose to remain in my shell. I especially liked your third quatrain. However, I can't help but wonder if your thoughts would've been more complete if not confined to a specific rhyme scheme; which, is not to say I didn't enjoy your poem. It just left me wondering if there's more.



Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Amanda Moubarak

7 Years Ago

Yes excatly. I too lost a lot of opportinities becuase i was too afraid. I'm very honored that you c.. read more
Hi Amanda, our lives are filled with What If's I very much enjoyed your poem, my friend. Great words and and flow. I loved the rhyming patter too. A pleasure to read you today.....Peter

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Amanda Moubarak

7 Years Ago

Thank you so much :) that means a lot !

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Added on October 3, 2017
Last Updated on October 3, 2017

Author

Amanda Moubarak
Amanda Moubarak

Bekaatet kenaan, Keserwen, Lebanon



About
When I can't speak, I write :) I wrote an ebook (poems and writings) : Writings of a broken soul. I wrote rap songs alone and with a group (the mob production). Facebook Page : Writings and Poetry .. more..

Writing