Alright, I'm trying to be happy since you were all complaining about how sad I was :P It's not as sad as my last few poems, still kind of emotional though. Tell me what you think, if you'd like (:
No more wishes at 11:11,
Laughs and loving kisses before bed,
Never again will I be like that,
'Til I'm sure he means what he's said.
I won't open my heart up,
'Til I'm sure I can actually trust,
I won't get my heart broken again,
True love and smiles are a must.
I'm tired of all the crying,
All of these wasted tears,
Really wish I could stop,
But they just seem to appear.
I guess heartbreak causes tears,
No matter how strong you are,
You can't hold it all in forever,
Like locking emotions in a jar.
But I will lock my heart away,
My true love will have the key,
Then I can finally be happy again,
Once he sets my heart free.
There is such a beauty in the heart of hope, even though it holds such scars of memory's echo. Yes, love involves a depth of trust, and I'm glad you're at a place where you can wait for the one who will adore you above all others. You're worth it, Amandaaa! :)
I really like your attitude to be happy, Amanda. But remember, you're young and situations like this always occur. I went through them as well when I was a little girl, lol. The hard part of heartbreaks is to get over them and to live happy without the memory of that someone haunting you but I can tell that that isn't going to be a problem for you. You're strong, I know and I can see that in your words :)
-Penelope H.
Heart break is awful but it's an experience, it's something you can use to improve yourself, you can learn from it. The most important message of it is that you can over come it, doing that shows to not only you but others as well that you are strong and that you will stand up after being knocked down. Great to know your picking up, this poem really grasps you rising to your feet again x
This is a very nice poem, I am glad that you are trying to be happy but you're young and sadness isn't something to feel bad about. It is a natural thing for teenager girls to feel a heartbreak but what is hard is to get out of that gloom and move on and that is what I like about your words. You are moving from that ocean of sadness and walking on the shore of happiness.
Hope things keep on going well for you,
-KS
Awwww, Amanda. I think that this is my favorite poem of yours. You're not the only one that has been repeatedly heart-broken and I am a smart person at that too. It's proven that it doesn't matter how much smarts you have, your heart over weighs that and goes with what it truly desires. I can totally relate to your beautiful poem though! I always make wishes at 11:11 and giving my all to the boy I am with. It sometimes feel that I have no more to give to the next guy I want to be with. It's true that it's better if we keep our heart locked away until the right person shows up and gains our trust to get the key to our fragile heart. By then, it'll be perfectly whole and mended into one strong and independent heart. The idea of your poem is something I've been trying to write about for awhile. I'm glad that you wrote it, so I could think about a few things while reading. It had me realize a couple of things that I wasn't able to notice before. I love writing and all the amazing results it gives me in return. Your work always impresses me with its true beauty. It's always beautiful and amazing to read! :)
"But I will lock my heart away,
My true love will have the key,
Then I can finally be happy again,
Once he sets my heart free." --My favorite stanza! It stood out the most to me more than the rest of the poem.
You should be proud of this poem! It's my favorite of yours.
Ashley Rivers--Dream BIG and you'll win BIG ;)
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
11 Years Ago
Awww, thank you Ashley! And yeah, I feel like that sometimes too. Heartbreak is definitely a terribl.. read moreAwww, thank you Ashley! And yeah, I feel like that sometimes too. Heartbreak is definitely a terrible feeling, but I'm feeling better now. Thanks again (:
11 Years Ago
You're very welcome! :) No problem at all. That's very good to hear though.
Yes this is emotional, but all poetry is, whichever emotion it may be portraying! anyone who tells you that your poetry is 'too emotional' is missing the point of it, since it is a form of self expression! This is certainly not depressing, as the vocab you use is assertive - you seem to have a clearer head than before Amanda and it is nice to see you are coming to terms with things. One thing my mum always told me was, you'll have a hundred broken hearts before you find the person who'll fix it. Good job and good luck! :)
I agree when u said that this isn't as depressing as the other ones. This poem was kind of like a love rollercoaster not exactly gone wrong but like kind of smooth but starting to get a little bumpy with the depression. When I thought about the title I thought about Demi Lavato's song Give Your Heart A Break. Still I thought this in a good way was like what Taylor Swift does after she breaks up with them. She immediatly tells how she feels and lets her ex-bfs know how she feels. I find that very animus like
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
11 Years Ago
Hahaha, thanks :P
11 Years Ago
Ur welcome sorry I got caught up in listening to music and writing new books and poems. Did I ever t.. read moreUr welcome sorry I got caught up in listening to music and writing new books and poems. Did I ever tell u I sometimes get inspired with books and poems by songs?
Yeah some books and poems the rest just struck like lightning. Ur ex if u ask me is dumb enough not .. read moreYeah some books and poems the rest just struck like lightning. Ur ex if u ask me is dumb enough not to realize that ur really pretty and it seems that ur really caring and friendy
I'm a fourteen year old who knows absolutely nothing about writing, but I try to make the best of it.
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