I am eau de toilette at your service!

Nose: Hello I am nose.

Parfum: Hello I am Eau De Toilette.

Nose: Okay! What do you want?

Parfum: Allow me to be of assistance !

Nose: I have a nose for everything!

Parfum: I want to tickle all your senses!

Nose: What even common sense?

Parfum: Common sense will only play
a part in the decision making process.

Nose: Okay! Hit me with it!

Parfum: Just one moment as I
remove my lid!

Spray spray!

Nose: O, o, o, fantastic, o, o, o,
O my gawd, o, o, o, terrific,
O, o, o, f**k this is good o!

OH! It’s gone! Oh! Where is it?

Parfum: Yes you have acclimatised
to my scent!

Nose: Well that’s just great!
Poof! And then what! It’s all gone
to whiff heaven has it?

Parfum: But wait!

Nose: You used me!
You can just bugger off
and take your spray with you!
Odour Toilette indeed!

Reviews

[barleygirl]

I truly envy your playfulness & the great elasticity of your imagination! Whew! I wonder if your real-life conversations are anything like this? I admire the person who can fathom a repartee between a nose & a bottle of cologne! *sheesh!* Keep stretching those synapses to keep them limber! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[andrew mitchell]

Thank you Margie

[Einstein Noodle]

oh my...your imagination is without bounds ... erectile nose hairs ... twitching and sniffing ...orgasmic proportional nose ...no wonder Cyranose was so adept :)))))))))))))))))))))))))))) do you drive your family to distraction Andrew?? ;)
E.

[andrew mitchell]

Lol hi Einstein, merry Xmas to you and yours. Actually I don’t distract the family too much. I have been reading Spike Milligan’s works and the works and autobiography of Peter Cook. Very clever funny work but so mad, absurd and just outrageous.These works are influencing my thinking and I grew up with these fine comedians. I have always had a warped sense of humour, I suppose I am releasing this rush of stuff on those who happen to stumble by my works. Lol. Just want to try something different. I liked your mathematics take on poetry, I’m still thinking of a reply. May have to ring my old mate Pythagoras to get his angle!😀

[Einstein Noodle]

yes ... good ol' Pyth! ... always a good resource ... i will have to check out Spike and Pete ... i read far too much serious stuff without that good balance of humor and comedy ... Merry Christmas to you and yours as well Andrew...a real pleasure to have you as friend right here at the Cafe' :)

[Wesley Dingler]

This is too funny, man.
I got a great laugh out of it.
My nose feels the same way about the ordeal.

[andrew mitchell]

Thank you Wesley, I shall visit soon. Merry Xmas to you.

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Andrew... this is exactly what I have been experiencing now in my golden years. Or perhaps they are not making Parfumerie as well as they did forty years ago... and it is even more expensive. You have given me a sense of well-being that I am not hallucinating when spraying my morning toilette. Fondly, Pat

[andrew mitchell]

Thank you Pat and merry xmas.:)

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Andrew... may frankincense and myrrh be your scent for the season and gold be your gift... truly, Pat

[andrew mitchell]

Thanks Pat my favourite incense sticks and better luck to you all.

[Chris Shaw]

Laughing my head off. Whatever you are indulging in, pass some my way:) Your lines tickled my sense of humour Andrew.

Chris

[andrew mitchell]

Thank you Chris Merry Xmas!:)

[Chris Shaw]

Merry Christmas Andrew, :)

[Neville]

whoever scent you that acid tab, did good sir... N x

[andrew mitchell]

You are too kind Neville. Glad to get one review and from you!

[Neville]

Here's to many more mate.. I'm sure they will come and if not.. well I shall just visit and leave more of me behind..