Prologue

The air was cool, unmoving. A mist that had spent the night thickening was now a heavy fog that had seamlessly connected to the sky. A wall of clouds erected on the mountain face silently spread down and out into the wooded valley below then beyond. The once soft earth was now chilled stone and where there had been dirt or grass or leaf was now silver crystal. The moon drifted in and out of the clouds slowly, giving the ground its pale sparkle.

            A small ship approached, but on no water. It was airborne, flying just over the trees, rustling them as it passed. Approaching the mountain base, it pulled upward, weaving through the heavy clouds of night and casting a shadow on the mountain pass below. The mist swirled around it as it broke through the thick screen, heaving toward the sky. Leveling out, it glided through the stillness of the winter air due north over a sea of clouds that expanded forever forward.

            The stars shone brilliantly, providing light upon the deck of the floating vessel. A hooded figure arose from the hull of the ship and stood handling a butterfly knife, flipping it, warm air escaping their lips. The figure sauntered towards the stern and peered up with emerald eyes that reflected the stars in brilliance and illumination.

            Once on stern, the figure stopped, glancing around the foggy sea and then the sky, finding the moon and lifting his free hand, took two fingers and positioned them as if to hold the moon; it was full that night. There was a silent pleasure in the action of holding the moon and the hooded figure huffed with a grin threatening his lips.

            Another dark, hooded figure appeared on deck, larger than the first. From the stern, the young man cocked his head to the side acknowledging the other, dropping his free hand yet never losing the swift rhythm of the knife.

“I dun mean to intrup, cap’n. Theys a boat ‘eaded due south in th’ distance frum the bow.” The butterfly knife stopped and the green eyes peered out into the sea of clouds. “What manner of boat sails at this hour?” The knife began swinging again.

            “Well b’sides ou’s, cap’n, none. Not usually. Methought that ‘tmight be a transport fo’ goods, but them boats dun travel this late. ‘Tis peculiar, cap’n.  The men wanta inwestigate.” The bigger shadow stepped forward, toward the stair leading up to the stern.

            The green eyes smirked. “What is the season, sir?”

            “Cap’n?”

            “You said it was sailing due south?”

            “Ay, cap’n.” The man shifted on his heels.  

            “It’s in all probability a supply ship. The hour may be late,” He paused, rethinking the time, “Or in all likeliness early, but there’s no more probable an explanation.”

            “But why would it be comin’ now, cap’n?”

“You feel it. It’s moving into the winter seasons. More brutal on the mountain towns, I’m afraid. Supplies are usually shipped around this time of year.” A brisk wind blew, ruffling the sails of the boat. The captain leaned against the far mast, closing his eyes, breathing deeply as he let the breeze blow through him. The other man shivered.

“What kinder surplies?” The man took a step forward to his superior, crossing his arms.

“Nothing useful, of course, just bland foods and overpriced blankets; never any trinkets of value. The men shouldn’t be troubled. It would be a useless investigation.” The young shadow sighed at the man behind him, the knife twiddling faster.

The man had been sailing the cloudy seas much longer than the captain, so he should be familiar with its common ships. Then again, the man had never struck the captain as intelligent. They sat in silence for a brief moment before the captain stopped the knife and glanced at the larger man, evaluating him.  But, what if he had seen a ship of interest? Perhaps a threat? It was dark, so it would be hard to be sure.

“Why are you asking?” There was a tinge of incredulity in the way the question was raised. The bigger shadow was silent, shifting his weight again, looking down, suddenly gruff. The captain’s glowing eyes were on the fellow then. Was he hiding something? “What have you seen?”

“Nothin’, cap’n. I never saw nothin’.”

Liar. The captain saw the man’s apprehension and raised an eyebrow. He looked the man up and down, wondering if there were more to what the large man had been saying or if this suspicion were a product of paranoia. This big man had never been smart, but he wasn’t one for secrets; he wasn’t that foolish, right? The captain wondered what purpose or gain there might be in lying about a threat. There were practically none. A look of sympathy crossed the captain’s face.

“Clearly something has rattled you, my friend. Should I be worried?”

“No. No no, cap’n. I dun see nothin’ I know that now. Don’ be worrien’ yrself.”

The knife swung its circle and the captain looked up, pondering something humorous before looking down and chuckling silently, finding a final rhythm with the knife. “Show me what you saw.” The captain ordered him lightly, snapping the knife shut.

 The bulky figure shifted his weight, hesitating, before he hobbled down the boat to its bow, turning back to the captain, watching as the small hood walked calmly forward with his hands crossed out of view behind his back and those gleaming eyes lost under a hood peering down.

There was a dark shape far below the ship, much larger than the one they stood on. It was easy to tell that from this distance. The large man had seen many cargo and supply ships in his time and had been slightly insulted at the notion that he couldn’t recognize one if he saw it. He pointed down at the dark ship for his captain to behold. Leaning forward, the captain with his hands and knife held behind him beheld the dark speck on the cloudy sea.

The captain stood still, beholding the structure.

Another wind blew through, lifting the captain’s hood off of his head revealing a young man’s face with hair shown silver in the moonlight, his emerald eyes on fire and his face hard. “Get the boys.” His voice was low and solemn, eyes still on the ship below.

“Get the boys.” He turned to the large shadow, his voice suddenly urgent and cold. The bigger man nodded and stumbled away. I told ‘em so, the man thought to himself with both a feeling of satisfaction and panic. He glanced back at the captain for a moment and watched the wind rustle the boy’s hair while the rest of him stood as still as a statue. The captain had not looked so entranced since… it was no matter to think of it. The man went down under the ship obediently and as quickly as he could.

The young shadow watched the big man stumble before he turned and placed both hands outstretched on the railing, leaning on them. He glanced to the knife in his right hand, closed and shining. He felt his muscles tighten in anticipation and his hand closed into a tight fist around the knife.

Turning to the speck in the distance, he grimaced, clenching his teeth behind closed lips and narrowing his shining eyes. Footsteps and hollering from below deck broke the silence of the night, drawing closer and closer to the young shadow, calming his nerves only slightly. One set drew nearer than the rest. The boy’s muscles tightened again. Too soon. Too close.

The emerald eyes turned, a cannon blazed in the distance, and the knife dropped off the ship’s edge down to oblivion.

Author's Note

how is the length, is the dialogue clean enough or should there be more dialogue beats, are the images clear enough, any feedback really

Reviews

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

I like this, it sounds very interesting. I am glad that you had the two figures talking differently, it really did help me to know who was who. I think you did the dialogue great, I also think that you did good with the visual but I can see you polishing it up a bit to make the visual more vivid, but this is a wonderful start (note: I love lot's of visual so others may think this visual you have provided is enough lol). I can see where some places are a little wordy and you can make some sentences shorter to help the reader better understand the surroundings, like the second sentence I think is a little long, just breaking it up a bit with the same information might be something to look into. Another thing I noticed was that you mentioned one hooded figure and then mentioned "smoke escaping their lips," I don't know if you meant to do that or if it was a typo. I think you did a great first chapter, it makes me want to turn the page and find out more, at the end it makes it sound like the man's ship is shot and I wonder if he is dead or not. You know how to capture the readers attention.

Great Job

[Lucy]

Your feedback is very much appreciated, especially about the places where I tend to veer verbose. I'm sure that there are plenty of details that could be reworded and expounded upon, too. Thank you!

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

You're welcome, I enjoyed reading it