Seasons Past Sestina

My first attempt at a Sentina.

In autumn, fading is the warmth of love
Through winter the flame flickers, still a chance
It slips again as the cold progresses, no more fire
To keep away the chill of the long, cold night
In spring, rebirth abound except here there is death
Emptiness inside, what was once present seems so far gone

Unusually bitter April days, all a blur, myself so far gone
The ticking sound of time passing by, spent searching for the love
Attempt to resurrect it from it’s insurmountable, horrid death
Swallowed up in a salty sea, without much of a chance
To escape to a brighter day, emerge from a dark everlasting night.
Questions stirring, any feelings left not singed by the fire?

Summer rolls in, bringing new heat yet extinguishing the fire
That has been burning so long, so strong. Turmoil slows, almost gone
A glimpse of blissful days past, a comforting whisper in the night
A picture of a time so full of happiness, a time so full of love
Is it another eye in the storm or has it cleared? take a chance
And tear down the walls again or stay locked up in this death?

Lost, confused, searching for new meaning, escape certain death
Pain deep down, feeling such hurt yet full of longing, rekindle the fire
Desire and devotion, to give myself wholly again, another chance
To be a couplet, how when the person once here is gone?
The blaze stirs, but maybe for a moment, immersed in hope for love
Forget deeds done, forgiveness fosters a scorching, warming night

Doubt and wicked thoughts soon consume the mind, seize the night
Clarity, wipe it clean to live once more, otherwise face death
And loneliness, lose the foundation, and try to thrive minus the love
There so long yet absent so quickly, abruptly, water thrown on fire
Push sensitivities, overcome insecurities, a hard prevailing, see it gone
Almost recaptured, in a second it’s reversed, need a second chance

Annihilated it seems, but it still thrives, too strong to die, a chance
A bond built strong, reinforced by the struggle, a confirming night
Trust so crucial shattered like a mirror thrown, diminished, so gone
Starts to sculpture, erect it strong, drive away the once sure death
Re-grow sturdy roots with sun so bright, an unyielding fire
Unable to be smothered any longer by trivial antics, choking the love

The vast distance is gone; there is a promising chance
An unfaltering, unconditional love; a new, peaceful night
Merriment at avoiding death; but such bewilderment at the new fire

Author's Note

Let me know what you think...what works, what doesn't...? And does anyone know if a sestina has to have a certain meter? The end lines follow the form but I did not follow any meter which i am not sure is necessary for a sestina.

Reviews

[ABitBrokenPoetry]

this is beautiful. such descriptive, gorgeous imagery here. a very strong, powerful write. i love how in each stanza this fire is continuiously there, all the way to the end. & one stanza flows amazingly into the other like the different seasons. "To escape to a brighter day, emerge from a dark everlasting night" i love this line. & the final stanza is beautiful. truly a gorgeous write.

[Robert Luna]

This seemed like such a deeply important story lying among these wonderful words and intense imagery. I got a feel of awaking to a new day of possibilities. As if we were seeing the world for the very first time with the amazement of dawn's new prospective. I am so glad to read your words . You are a true artist.

Great Job!!!!!!!

[Michael X]

this is brilliant and I think your skill could easily apply any form rules with the knowledge I see,
at the same time a truly beautiful poem. here and there I felt the wording a tad underplayed,
the magnificent depth and the entirety of the poem and flow you presented blows me away.
a uniquely soft, gentle sky of expression, a rarely seen expressive, amazing rhythm, a real gem.

[emmajoy]

I had to check on what a sestina is .. and found as follows:

The sestina follows a strict pattern of the repetition of the initial six end-words of the first stanza through the remaining five six-line stanzas, culminating in a three-line envoi. The lines may be of any length, though in its initial incarnation, the sestina followed a syllabic restriction. The form is as follows, where each numeral indicates the stanza position and the letters represent end-words:

1. ABCDEF
2. FAEBDC
3. CFDABE
4. ECBFAD
5. DEACFB
6. BDFECA
7. (envoi) ECA or ACE

So, though I am anything but an expert.. oh dear, no... not sure that your poem is a sestina.

However, I think your writing is wonderful! You move through the seasons in a lovely way, showing the weather and the moods associated with each time of year .. and you do that so beautifully:

' Summer rolls in, bringing new heat yet extinguishing the fire
That has been burning so long, so strong. Turmoil slows, almost gone
A glimpse of blissful days past, a comforting whisper in the night
A picture of a time so full of happiness, a time so full of love '

This writing has real depth and power - though power held in a gentle hand.

[Twilight]

I do not know much about the sestina format, but the praise in your other reviews seems fully justified! As far as I can see, you have not digressed from the structure which you start with, in verse one. Overall, I found this an interesting piece of writing.

Some of the lines, somehow created nostalgic thoughts in my mind. Whilst there were others, which made me yearn for a state of serenity, which I have yet to attain. Perhaps, some people would identify with this, as their "nirvana"?

I could not help wondering, if this poem was inspired by real-life experiences, from recent days? Or perhaps, the writer has assimilated a variety of her more cherished thoughts and memories, from long ago? Either way, a rather unique and inspiring piece of writing! Thankyou, Lauren Beth, for adding this to my Group, "Twilight's Disciples"!

[deeps]

I think it's a real beautiful write and wonderful
It is a very powerful read. I don't know anything
About tose types of poems. I do know this is amazing.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Wow I don't know anything bout this sestina poems but all i know is this poem itself is a true masterpiece, it is so brilliant from beginning to end as it shows just how deep and complicated life and love can be and the roller coaster of emotions we go through everyday. This piece to me is pure creative genius and you have written some great pieces but this has become my favorite.