chapters 1-4

Chapter 1-

“I couldn’t hear anything over the pounding of my heart; it was trying to escape my body, encaged within me. Eyes focused, planning the attack. My feet dancing as my body glides around the ring, like a lion provoking its prey. This is where I belong, where I don’t have to hide. The pain and anger inside me rumble to the surface, and explode as I attack. My opponent goes down, lost to the darkness. I have won again, I hear the cheers of the crowd, but I can’t focus on it, all I see is the blood dripping from my knuckles where I hit her. She is still there on the ground not moving, people are coming in to help her. She knew when she came to fight that she would lose, I shouldn’t care. But I do every time I win I remember their faces and the pain I gave them. I’m a monster for loving this no matter how much I try to hide from it, it’s there.  I can see myself now, it’s not who I want to be, but it’s the true me. The one, who loves the fight, loves to torture others with her skill. I’m a monster and that’s never going to change. “

            I awoke drenched with sweat, breathing like my life only had seconds left. These thoughts have been haunting me since I came to live with my best friend Sarah. I’ve known Sarah my whole life. She is beautiful, with her striking long black hair that fell from her head in perfect beach waves. She has these blue eyes that can capture you for ages if she let you look at her for that long. Sarah used to be the shy one between the two of us. She always had her head in a book, never letting herself go and have fun.

Lately though she has been taking care of me, it never used to be that way. I remember the first time I met her, she was walking down the hallway at school freshman year and some stupid senior guy pushed her causing her books to fly everywhere. Everyone walked around her like she wasn’t there, I almost did until I saw her face. Her bottom lip was shaking, and I could tell she was holding back tears. It was in that one second that I decided to help her and since then we have become best friends; sisters.

We were completely different. While she loved to spend time alone on Friday night, I loved to go have fun and hang with as many people as I could. Everyone knew who I was, no one knew who she was and we liked it that way. We didn’t push each other to be different then who we were, and we loved everything about each other. That’s different now or really it’s more like I’m different now. It all started about two years ago, at the beginning of grade 10.

           

The crazy sisters are what people used to call me and my sister, for we were completely different. No one believed we were sisters but somehow we were.  Her name was Anna, the stereotypical cheerleader. She was a perfect, blonde, tanned skin, blue eyed sweet girl. Her personality was bubbly and caring; everyone who knew her loved her. You just couldn’t hate her, while I was totally different.

We were the two different sides of life. She was always good never using attitude and caring about everyone. Me, on the other hand, was always getting into trouble, loved a good dangerous thrill and couldn’t give a crap about what other people thought. I had straight brown hair that went down to my hips and dark brown eyes that could have any boy running. I had a look about me that made people scared to get in my way, that or they hear about what I do. By that I mean how I fight.

No matter what happened in my life I knew I could survive. For I was never alone, and I don’t mean I had friends I could go to or family, no I had a passion. A passion that wasn’t always the easiest but it was always there when I needed it to be. Through all my family issues or when my friendships were going through a rough time I could always count on fighting. It was my escape from reality, when I put the gloves on, it was like nothing else mattered. It felt like home.

            I used to spend hours practicing every day; no matter how busy I was I always found time to fight. It was like I was broken never whole, until I got in that ring and I was awoken. My mind became sharp; my eyes watched my surroundings, looking for a way to win.  I’ve never lost a fight, and I never will. For it may still be a part of me but it’s one of the sides I push down far enough that I act like it’s not there.  I can never go back to the way things were. I took everything for granted back then, never caring always upsetting everyone. Now I wish I could take it all back and appreciate it, but that’s impossible. That part of my life is dead just like my parents.

            The accident happened September 9^th 2014, two years ago from today. It started off like any other day, my father sitting at the table reading the daily newspaper. He was a tall man, but it was like he was uncomfortable with it. Like he just grew over night and was still getting used to his body. His short spiked black hair was starting to show a little grey even though he dyed it two weeks ago. He works as a bank manager, he makes enough for us to have a house and food on the table, what more could you ask for?

            While my father is quiet and keeps to himself, my mother is loud and always telling you what she thinks. It’s like she doesn’t have a filter in her head - she just says the first thing that comes to her mind. I have no idea how my parents fell in love or decided to get married for now all they seem to do is argue on purpose with each other.  My mother knows how to cook though, no matter what time you walked through the front door you could always smell the sweet, mouth-watering smell of the food she made. It overtakes your senses in a way that even if you weren’t hungry you just couldn’t say no to it. She always acted like the perfect mother but no one knew her really like me.

            My mother was beautiful.  she had these full red lips that when she smiled showed perfect white teeth �" that was if you ever saw her smile. Her shoulder length blonde hair always pulled back into a tight professional bun.  Her stunning blue eyes were just as cold as her heart. The only thing I got from my mother was her deadly stare. People were scared of her; she wasn’t someone you wanted to mess with. I used to be one of those people - scared of her until one day I had enough of her love for my sister and hatred for me.

I never understood why she never cared for me as much as my perfect sister but if I couldn’t get her love I might as well get her attention. That was the start of my rebellion.

 Soon the queen of ice was challenged with someone who didn’t back down. That someone was me, fueled by the fire of my rebellion and the want of a loving mother I knew I would never get.

We fought many times, no one ever won, it was never ending. Her heart was frozen and she never felt anything when it came to me. All I got were expressionless faces, never any hugs or caring words. It wasn’t her fault she didn’t have enough love for both of her children after all I was the tough one.

            We were all eating breakfast together like any normal family did this morning. My mother and sister were talking about what my sister would be wearing to prom and her date Derek. My sister had spent months looking for the perfect dress and finally she found one last week. It’s all my mother and sister could talk about. I usually just block them out for I didn’t care about some stupid dance - after all I still had two more years to it - but today it was different. I managed to catch the last whisper of the conversation

“..We will all go honey.” My mother was practically gushing. “My baby is so grown up, we will leave right away, let’s go get ready.”  

And with that my mother was gone running up the stairs to get ready with my sister.

            I turned to my father hoping I heard my mother wrong, “Please tell me she meant we will all go as in just her and Elizabeth?

Sadly my father shook his head, “This is a big deal for your sister. Now go get changed we are leaving in a couple of minutes”. 

He took his newspaper and followed my mother and sister up the stairs. Great, just great I was going to have to cancel on Sarah again; there was no way my mother would let me skip out on this one. Sarah and I had plans to see the new movie out today, of course it was a chick flick.  After all, I may kick butt but I am still a girl. That won’t be happening today though. Grunting as I pushed myself up from the kitchen chair, I made my way slowly upstairs to get ready for the miserable day of watching my sister steal all the attention.  Her life was like a perfect movie, she got the dress, the guys, she got everything; when would it be my time? When could I finally get out from her shadow?

 Little did I know the time was right around the corner, the time where there would be no more of my sister’s shadow, no more of her at all. If I would have known this is what it would have taken to get my wish, I would take my wish back in a heartbeat. The secret of life is that there is no going back only forward. That’s one lesson I learned the hard way.

            The car ride to the shop was the worst, for my mother’s taste in classical music always poured through the speakers. My mother was softly humming to the melody while my sister was texting - probably her new boyfriend, Derek.  Who knows though, she always had one right after the other.  The light ahead of us finally changed green and my father bolted forward. The same time the truck coming towards us turned causing his truck to come straight at us.

 Before I knew what was happening the car was spinning, and an eerie scream rang clear as crystal throughout my head. My body was whipped around, for I wasn’t controlling it anymore. I could feel a sharp pain explode in my chest, a warm wetness soon spreading.  My head was slammed against the tainted window of the truck. I was surrounded by darkness, devouring in the unknown, my life stopped the same time my heart took its last beat and my body took its last breathe. I was dead.   

Chapter 2

You know how people say before you die you see your life flash across your eyes, well that’s not what happens. It’s more like your brain can’t process what is happening and your heart just stops or that’s how I remember it. This was the day my whole life changed, and it can’t ever go back.

I remember the day my soul was placed back into my body or that’s what it felt like. All of sudden my lungs filled with air again, and my pulse started up again. That’s not what I remember most though, I remember the pain. It was like my veins were filled with fire, burning my insides. My stomach felt like it was ripping away trying to cut loose from me. I tried to open my mouth, to express the violence that was emerging from my body but I could not speak. I tried to make my body curl together like I could hide from the pain but I couldn’t move. My mind racing, trying to move the body I was in, but it wasn’t responding. It was like my body was not my own I wasn’t awake I was encaged and that was unbearable.   

            Time passed, no way for me to stop it. It was like my brain was alive, for I could hear everything, and I could still process all that was going on. But I couldn’t talk or see, it was like I was stuck between living and not living. For what’s a life, when you can’t control your own body? When you can’t tell the ones you love that you’re not gone that they hadn’t lost you? It’s torture knowing your life can end any minute by these doctors pulling the plug on you for how can they tell you’re alive? I needed a way to tell them, anything would work.

            Over time though I saw it was useless no matter how hard I pushed myself, it was impossible. I gave up all hope in knowing if my family was alright, if they made it out. The fight within me was gone. I could feel myself becoming weaker, not having the strength to keep going.  I don’t know how long has passed, it could be days or weeks by now or maybe it was only hours. I could not tell, for I stopped listening to the doctors. At first I inhaled every detail, every word. Until I realized they never talked about my family, only me and I didn’t want to hear that. For it was the same stuff over and over again.

“Poor girl, too young to be battling death”

“She doesn’t look so good; doctor says they don’t think she will make it.”

“She needs to fight, we did all we can she just needs time to heal.”

            I was going to die, I had accepted my fate, but I didn’t want to leave until I knew how my family was doing. So I held on, almost to my breaking point. Now though I wasn’t sure why I had been trying so hard. I wouldn’t ever see them again, I couldn’t touch them.

But you could hear them. You can know they survived and can live their life.

The thought raced around in my head, and made me realize no matter how badly I wanted to give up I couldn’t. I needed to see this through, I needed to know. So I waited, and waited to even get a sliver of information about what happened after the car accident.

 Nurse after nurse nothing changed. They would come in check my heartbeat, run some test on me and then I would be alone again. Alone to the thoughts that I desperately wanted to run away from.  The thoughts that started coming more and more often- my family was dead.

            No one had come in to check on, not even see how I was doing. The only knowledge that kept me from losing my mind was that my mother wouldn’t leave my sister’s side if she was still hurt. My name probably wouldn’t even cross her mind, but my father, he was different. He would have come and checked on me at least once I hoped, but for his sake and the hole in my heart that grew bigger ever time I thought of him dead, I really wish he just forgot about me.

            I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn’t realize someone had come into my room, until a hand was placed on my arm. I could feel the warmth of the small hand grip harder as the cries grew louder. Whoever was here was in pain, their tears landing on my arm making a path of wetness as they slid down off my arm. The cries were too soft for a guy, the person here was a girl, one that I couldn’t place. I had to have known her though, no one can have this much pain in their cries for a stranger.

“Elizabeth”

The sweet angel voice, softly spoke my name and my heart broke. I knew who she was, I’ve known her my whole life, it was Sarah.

“Please don’t go, I don’t know what I would do without you. Come back to me, I need my best friend.” Sobs broke through her, her body rocking the bed as it shook. “Yeah you can be crazy and annoying at times, but life wouldn’t be the same without you here.”

She slowly moved her hand down to grab a hold a hold of mine. “You make any situation better, your laugh is contagious, your smile can lighten up any room and you’re my other half. You can’t leave, please don’t go”.  Her words laced with pain and heartbreak.

            I’ve been a fighter my whole life. No matter what fight I went into I was never scared, I knew I would win and that I was unstoppable. This time though I was terrified this wasn’t a fight I thought I could come out of. Seeing Sarah here, sobbing, made my heart shatter. I couldn’t give up, I wouldn’t. I thought I would be okay with just knowing how my family did, but I wasn’t, I needed to keep living for my family, for Sarah, for myself.

It took me a lot longer then I wanted to finally move my body. It was when Sarah came for her third visit; she came after school every day and usually just sat there beside me. Sometimes reading or book or doing homework, or other times just holding my hand and telling me we will get through this.

            It was during that third visit that I finally was able to reconnect with my body. It was like a pulse finally shot through my muscles and convinced them to move. It wasn’t a lot, I was only able to squeeze her hand back, but it was enough.

            I heard her quick intake of breath and her voice yelling out for a nurse, before her attention turned back to me.

“I knew you were still here Lizzie; I knew you wouldn’t give up. You always were a fighter, even when the doctors said you wouldn’t make it, I knew you would.”

            Cheers of joy escaped her, as she told the nurse what had happened. Soon when anyone come in to check on me, I heard them talking differently and this time it wasn’t just about me.

“Doctors say it’s a miracle, she wasn’t supposed to come back. They say not to have faith though; she might still never wake up.”

“She has come more responsive then her sister though, hopefully her sister is more like her”.

            At the sound of my sister my heart quickened. She hasn’t woken up, she’s just like me. She is sitting there in a coma, not being able to do anything, say anything. I have to wake up, I need to see my sister.

 

Chapter 3:

White flashed before me, blinded me from seeing. My eyes burned with the new sight, darkness had become my friend over the past while. My mouth was on fire, I couldn’t get a word out for I hadn’t talked since the accident. No matter how much pain I was in though, it didn’t matter for I was awake, and as my vision cleared I could see my hospital room for the very first time.

            I was lying on a small, blue hospital bed that had a thick warm white blanket covering my body, hiding me from the slight chill that swayed through the room.

The room itself was small- a one person room. The walls were a dim shade of yellow, like it was worn in and had gone through many hard times, which the people who were in here before me probably did.

On the left side of the room held a small rectangular window, showing the sweet shine of afternoons light. I could hear the traffic moving around outside, the nurses running outside of my room. Everything was different then what I pictured in my head.

 I had tubes going in my body, needles in my hands pumping a liquid in and out of my body. I was living because of these machines; they were the only thing that kept me alive. I knew I was hurt but seeing how badly I was scared me for the first time. It was like I was dying all over again, I couldn’t breathe; I was shaking from the terror. My heart monitor started beeping alerting the nurses that I was in trouble. I couldn’t hear though for I was stuck in place.

I almost died, I almost died, I almost died.

The thought ran across my mind, it was the other thing I could think about. It was like when I couldn’t see it, I could act like it didn’t happen, that it was all a dream, I would wake up and be fine.

But I had woken up, and I had awoken to a nightmare. This was no fairy tale, it wasn’t like the movies where the girl woke up and everything was perfect. I was broken, my body might have been fixed but it wasn’t like it used to be. I could feel it, it felt sluggish and even though I could see I lost some weight my body felt heavier then it ever had. And I wasn’t even sitting up yet.

My mind started to slow down, spots were covering my sights, and dizziness had set in again. I fell into the darkness that had had once stolen me from this world not long ago.

 

 

            Time seemed to pass quickly once I had woken. Everywhere I went there seemed to be another test, more doctors, and no answers. I asked and asked about my family, screaming till there was no air left within me. I would breakdown, tears seemed to normal to me now, but no matter what I did, they said the most important part was to get me better.

            That only made me sure something wasn’t right and it killed me not knowing. They wouldn’t let anyone into my room; they isolated me from everyone, till today.

            One of the main nurses taking care of me entered my room, turned towards me and stared at me with a smile on her face. I couldn’t believe the words that left her mouth.

"Hello Elizabeth, I know we haven't been answering your questions lately but that's about to change. We have been waiting for you to be strong enough for you to here this....."

 That one sentence had the power to make me stop breathing , strong enough? What does that mean? My worst thoughts are coming true, my family is gone and I will never see them again.

                I will never get to see my father reading the newspaper, or drive to school with my sister hearing all about her problems or have a fight with my mother. Just like that I realized my whole life I never gave me family a chance.

              All I did was see the wrongs with them, but no one is perfect, yet all I did was fight with them. I never got the chance to have a relationship with them, I never got to feel the love of a family and now I never will again.

              That's when I realized the doctor was still talking and I had to focus on what she was saying.

"......and she has been awake for a few days and it's time for us to bring you to her. Are you ready to see your sister?"

 I barely let her get the sentence out before the tears started coming. My sister was alive, I still had a family and just like that my body turned to ice. I missed her telling me about my parents.

"W-what about my mother and father? Where are they?"

Terror swept into the doctors eyes and she look startled for a second. I knew she was worried that I didn't hear it the first time but she took a long breathe and explained it again. Who knew joy could be taken from you so fast.

"Elizabeth, they died before coming into the hospital. They are gone Elizabeth I'm sorry."

"Does my sister know?"

"No she hasn't been responding well to our treatments. She has just gotten her strength back and we think it will help her seeing you before I tell you the news.”

My heart went out to my sister, she was so close to my mother, this will break her . Even through the pain I was going through I knew it was nowhere near what she will feel. I knew I had to be the one to tell her she at least deserved that.

“Would it be possible to tell her myself? I need to be there for her.”

*******

Breathe in, breathe out. I don't know how long I've been thinking that , staring at my sisters room. Never in my life have I had trouble telling people the truth and telling them the things they don't want to hear but this is different.

 This isn't just telling someone their boyfriend is cheating it's telling someone they are going to be an orphan, and that someone is my sister.

This news will break her, she won't ever be the same and I have to be there for her. I need to be strong. She deserves to know, and as I pull the strength from inside me I wheel myself into her room.

   The sight that I see In front of me, shocks me speechless. Nothing could have prepared me for this moment. My sister had bruises covering half her face and body along with long cuts over her arms probably more under the blanket and hospital gown.

            I couldn't speak, my mouth went dry and my tongue felt to big for my mouth. Her eyes took their target on me. This was the moment her and my world were going to change forever. I thought she would need me for this and that we would become closer, using the strength of each other to survive.

Little did I know, my sister never needed me, that she wouldn't want me around anymore. That she and I would never see each other again for years. If I had known, I would have taken the moments in the hospital more important, if just I would have known I would have tried to make her stay.

I wouldn't  of let her leave me alone, I could of fought for my sister but I never knew and now my life's are all what ifs and there's nothing I could do to change that.

If only I had known.

 

 

2 years later........

 

"Oh my god Sarah that looks amazing" I was practically screaming at her. She had this short little red number on revealing her curves that she practically never shows. I never understand why she never chooses to show off what she has but seeing her now fidget and the frown on her face I see why.

    She's uncomfortable in her own skin; she hates the looks guys give her when I talk her into wearing something tighter and sexier. I know it's a lost cause trying to get her to buy but I try anyways.

"Come on Sarah, you like killer just relax a little and buy it. Who knows when you will need a dress like that, if I had your b***s I wouldn't ever hid them." And that was true, while I had b cups Sarah was rocking d's, I still wish sometimes we could switch bodies.

    Sarah had a more feminine body where it was soft in all the right places where mine was rougher. My arms and legs were defined with muscle and my stomach had a hard 6 pack that all was disappearing from the absence of fighting in my life, just running has kept what is left of my muscles but nowhere near what is was.

    But here I was, I'm front of the store mirror beside Sarah being on the other side of her death glare, yep I was right there is no way she was buying that dress. As I got her eye in the mirror a laugh escaped me.

 Soon enough we we're both on the ground tears running down our faces. We quickly left the store and heading to an empty seat in the food court. Pouring our bags on the seats beside us and barely missing a beat went right back to the latest drama.

 Sarah was in the middle of a story about her biology partner when all of a sudden everything stopped.

The rest of the world just blurred away, Sarah's story just faded into the background and I couldn't believe it. My hands we're starting to sweat and I was having a hard time breathing. She's here. She's in this mall, is she here to see me? Why is she back? Why is my sister here and what does that mean?

      "…….Lizzie? You listening? Lizzie?” Sarah’s words finally came back to me as she got louder and louder. I noticed I had been staring off for a while and as I looked back to meet her eyes she saw the terror rattling within me.

"Elizabeth what's wrong? What happened?"

But I couldn't answer for the words were stuck on my tongue, but as I looked back to where I saw my sister I froze. She wasn't there anymore but she was here, I swore I saw her. I quickly scanned the food court for any site of her but there wasn't any. Oh god it's been two years since the accident it's just my emotions getting better of me, for my sister would never come back.

There's nothing left for her here, only me, and I know that's not enough for her. I learned that lesson once. So I decided to shake off the feeling I got from her and tried to enjoy the rest of my day with Sarah.

                   

 *******

 

I tried and tried though and all I could think about was is she really back? I know getting my hopes up is only going to hurt me in the end but I can't help it. She's the only family I have and she has a lot of explaining to do.

    I needed a break from Sarah's wondering glances and her questions about what happened back at the mall. I couldn't explain that to her for I couldn't even explained what happened to myself let alone anyone else, so I decided to go out for a walk. I needed to forget about everything for a while and that's exactly what I did.

As I finally arrived home from the walk I grabbed my keys from my purse and felt a presence behind me. I whipped backwards but nothing was there. I sat there in silence for a few minutes noticing the world around me.

    The streets were bare, and the darkness was starting to sneak up on the sunlight making the world darker as it becoming closer to night time. There was no one around me though.

 

    Finally seeing as it was safe I went back to my door and started to grab the keys when a hand snaked around my neck and the last sound I heard was the keys hitting the cement as I was taken   from my home.

Chapter 4:

Once again I found myself waking up from a deep, dark sleep, but this time I wasn't in the hospital and I didn't have anyone with me. I was in a small cold room, lying on the cement. The cold that was slipping through my thin blue sweater was becoming unbearable. I don't know how long I have been laying here but my body was already numb and it was hard to breathe for the room seem to be filled with a foul odour that I couldn't place. As I sat up, I started going through exactly what happened yesterday.

 

 

 

 

   I was taken from my home, someone knocked me out and I couldn't even fight back. My body was filling with a new cold presence and this time it wasn't from the floor. I wanted to know who took me, where I was and why this was happening. I was never at the mercy of someone else, my entire life I was always one step ahead of my opponent and I don't like how this feels now. They could do anything they wanted to me and I don't have a say in anything.  I finally knew what the cold presence was- terror

How much I wish I was still my old self, the one who wouldn't be sitting her shaking, who wouldn't have already given up without even trying, the one I can never be again. I want to bring her back, to save me but I can't, bringing her back would be like bringing back all the memories. I can't survive that again, I barely did the first time.

As my mind was racing, someone had come to the other side of my door. I heard keys rattling and whoever it was was having a hard time trying to get the key in the lock, soon followed with a clank as the keys hit the floor.

"Crap” A roughed husky edged voice came through the door. Finally he got the door unlocked and opens a crack, but no one came in. Instead I heard his voice again

"You got 10 minutes, and then Jarod wants to see her. Don't screw this up; it's your last chance."

 Even without seeing him, I know he's upset, for his voice is filled with an icy chill that would have me running if I could.  As I heard footsteps retreating, the door opened wider to show me who was on the receiving side of the man’s cold vicious voice. It ended up being the person who could answer all my questions and not just the ones about this situation.

As the person face came into view I saw the recognizable full red lips, blonde curly hair, and stunning eyes but instead of being filled with hope and dreams they were filled with sorrow and pain. They held a lost look, and she knew that those eyes have seen terrible things and those things were still haunting her.

This was not the person she knew, standing in front of her was a broken down, sheltered version of her sister. She was happy to see her sister was alive but at the same time she realized she didn't know her anymore. This is someone new entirely, someone who she wasn’t sure she would like to know.

Anna just stood there staring at me, neither of us moving. I couldn’t tell how she feeling, her emotions were hidden beneath the stone cold face she was putting on now. As I looked closer though, a piece of annoyance flashed across her face before it was gone once again.  There was no love for me in her anymore. No tears of joys, smiles or hugs, and I realized her leaving, meant nothing to her. It ripped me apart, tore at my body raging inside of me every day since the accident as this…this person walked away and she didn’t even care. She acted like it was a burden to see me again.

God she dragged me out here, it wasn’t like I wanted to come. Anger had always been a way out for me, when things turned upside down I used anger as a way to hide the emotions boiling inside me. It became a good friend of mine, this time though, I tried endlessly to feel some sort of hatred or rage but my body was weak. I had no energy left within me and I knew I was truly alone.

There was no help coming for me and unless some miracle happened I was at the will of whoever was out there, but I knew better then to wish for a miracle. Miracles are a false hope and I learned that there are no such things, a long time ago.

******

We didn’t speak as I trailed behind her, trying to remember the turns we made. There was no one in site, but you could hear voices as we passed closed doors.  After going through three long hallways we finally reached huge oak doors. You could tell whoever’s place this is has a lot of money from the marble flooring to the crystal chandeliers.

The house or whatever it was held a certain presence to it, the designs of the house represent clean, order, and a sense of family, but with it came a colder bone chilling feeling. It was like the house was a set-up to make you feel safe and lower your defenses, stops you from questioning what’s really going on. That’s what scares me the most, what kind of things are you in if your trying his hard to fool everyone around you? My answer came sooner then I thought as my sister opened the doors, and I met the man who captured me and made me a prisoner.

As I walked into the room the conversations stopped and all eyes turned to look my way. We were in a common room but there was no television or family pictures up on the wall. It was more of an office then anything, but it was big enough to hold over 40 people if it wasn’t for the table in the middle of the room. There were around 15 people sitting around, when we opened the doors they were arguing, throwing their hands up but now all conversations had stopped, all eyes now focused on me and my sister.

As my eyes travelled around the room I picked up on a few things, for one they aged from 27 to as old as 50. They all were fit, and I don’t mean little muscular and runners bodies, I mean broad shoulders and bulging biceps, with toned legs and rock solid core. They looked like they barely had any fat on their bodies.  After all my years of fighting I got good at picking out how peoples bodies, moved from the strength they can use or to the speed they can affectively move their bodies, all by looking at them. I can tell if your working out to just for health but don’t use it for work or a sport, or have muscles from using them everyday. Its not hard to tell how comfortable you are in your own body, if its natural or not. But these people weren’t fake, they knew how to control their bodies, how to strike, from the look of them they could do a lot of damage. They are fighters, and ones you don’t want to get on the wrong side of.

            Piercing brown eyes met mine at the end of the table, power was oozing out of him, he had longer black hair and a face that make you stop to do a double take. His jawlines were sharp, nose a little longer and you could tell it was broken a few times, his cheekbones raised high but the thing that stood out the most was his scar.  It started above his right eyebrow and ended right under his ear.

 He could have been called handsome but when his lips curled up in appreciating smile and with his eyes roaming all over my body he turned predatory. Like you were his and he was going to do with you as he pleases, it made me sick to my stomach. To make it worse my sister walked right up to him and he pulled her in close. His lips playing on the side of her temple, she wasn’t even stopping him. This man was sick and my sister just stood there letting him to do whatever he pleases.

Its like a switch inside me just turned on, the fire burning inside of me grew and spread through my body, the fire that I use to let overtake me in ever fight. It wanted to be released, the animal inside me that I fought so hard with wanted to play. My hands itched to do some damage. These people looked at me like I was pathetic, like I didn’t belong here, oh how I would prove them wrong.

When the fire inside me took over my morals, my fear went out the window, it wanted the taste of blood, to conquer anyone who crossed me, it wanted power. When I let it go I’ve always had control on it but right now I was slipping going under, this was always the second side of me. The one I never let anyone see unless in the ring but this time was different.

I saw it now, they changed her, it wasn’t just the accident these people especially him, used her and took away her spirit. They will not get away from it, just as it was about to consume me the man yelled

“STOP” it was more of a command then a suggestion and it stopped me in my track. The fire dies within, only embers are left. Now I finally understand why he’s the leader, you can’t disobey him, its nature to follow him but that’s who I am. He may have stopped me this time, but if he thinks I’m just going to roll over and obey he’s wrong. I will wait my time and find the best opportunity to make my strike.

I need to learn everything about him, they way he thinks, how he operates, his weaknesses, his strength’s, how I can get close to him without him expecting everything, I need to who this man they call Jarod is.

As I’m thinking this I realize he already knows how to read me, for he knew when the fire was released and that’s one of my greatest secrets. How much more can he know about me even with my defences up? The defences I’ve used my whole life don’t work with him, ill have to come up with something new if I want to live. Ill play by his rules now but he will never own me, no one controls me and no one ever will.  

Author's Note

grammar is bad, ingore