The Bees Whispered Irony

A Story by alliemoop

A snippet of a story about the relationship of a boy and a girl.

She was full of vim and vigor, he was dim and always looking for liquor.

“I don’t think that’s true,” Simon mumbled, shading his eyes from the sun. It was one of those rare days where it was bright and shiny, the trees glowed with green and crackled at the hush of the winds. The smell of flora permeated the air as the bushes danced with pink petals and the bees sang of nature in a morse code of buzzes. Simon hated the goddamn bees.

“What’s not true?” Calvin asked. They were walking side-by-side, headed to Calvin’s place. She preferred to be called Cal, a nickname Simon coined, but nowadays Simon called her Calvin. Primarily because it annoyed her, secondarily because it amused him, and tertiarily because the name Cal had become so commonplace among their friends and families that to Simon it’s lost all of its appeal. Simon wasn’t sure which of the reasons was more poignant, he reasoned that it must be the first one.

“You said Dr. Fox claimed that we were the antithesis of each other, how could that be true?” he asked.

“You only want to believe that it isn’t because you got the worse side of the coin,” she paused and rolled her eyes. “The butt side.”

Simon groaned but powered past the bad joke to make a point. “Calvin, our entire relationship grew on the fact that we had too many things in common,” Simon gathered his thoughts. “Too much, now that I think about it. Think of how statistically unlikely it is for one person to love The Barenaked Ladies, let alone two within the same town.”

Cal chuckled, “maybe, but you are a little bit bummy.” She took another pause, “and I’m a little bit lovely.” She finished proudly.

“But I would say I’m a little bit funny.”

“Only cause you’re a little bit of a dummy.”

Simon looked away to the bees, trying very hard not to smile and give her the satisfaction. “Have I been a drag at all today Calvin?” He postulated.

“Well no,” she admitted.

“Then how are you Ms. Sunshine and I’m Mr. Can’t Get Enough of Moonshine?” Simon whined, though he attempted to sound dignified.

Cal thought for a bit, playing with her hair. She was pretty�"well actually she wasn’t, she had acne, stretch marks, needlessly pointy elbows, there was a scar near her neck from the time she jumped off Simon’s bed as a kid and hit an open can of sardines�"for the life of him, Simon could never remember why there was an open can of sardines in his room in the first place�"and her shoes were worn out. Simon never thought of Cal as attractive, in fact he ever hardly thought of her as a girl, but with the warm light of the sun caressing her skin, her perfume mixing with the smell of flowers, her long black hair greeting the hush of the winds�"she was indeed a girl, Simon hated that. Almost as much as the goddamn bees.

“I mean you are quite a downer for much more of the time than I am, Simon,” she finally answered.

Simon predicted that answer, “maybe, but you are a downer yourself from time to time, sometimes you’re sarcastic, sometimes you’re not, sometimes you’re complicated, sometimes you’re simple, sometimes you love it when the sun is out, and sometimes you hate it.” Simon wanted to keep going but her eyes locked to his and he lost his voice for a moment.

“What are you getting at?” Cal nudged him.

Simon cleared his throat. “I don’t think anyone is the antithesis of anyone, nor do I even think we’re special for liking The Barenaked Ladies, everyone is a spectrum of personalities and they overlap�"constantly,” Simon smiled to himself in satisfaction.

Cal stared at him blankly, “so what? No one’s unique? Everyone is the same?”

“To a certain extent,” he shrugged.

“Yeah but you do drink more than most people,” she locked her eyes with his again.

Simon shook his head, “I saw you during Easter,” Simon raised an eyebrow.

Cal blushed and exclaimed at him after punting leaves towards his feet. “Why are we friends then?”

“What do you mean?” Simon said, rubbing his temple with a finger.

“If everyone is essentially the same,” she paused. “Simon, why are we friends?”

Simon thought deeply. “No particular reason I suppose. We met young, we grew up together, you were there, I was there,” Simon smiled.

“That’s it?” She sounded disappointed. “We’re friends because we were just there? Out of convenience?”

Simon shrugged “What are friends for if not to be there?”

Cal smiled, satisfied.

There was a moment of silence, Simon decided to break it, “Dr. Fox say anything else then?”

Cal shook her head, “just the normal stuff. You know, are things going well at home, have you lapsed since Easter, are you eating healthy, is there anyone you feel comfortable talking to, all of that jazz,” she stared at Simon. “Will you hold my hand?”

Simon took her fingers gently, ignoring the sweat. He took another look at her and realized how dangerous it was becoming to keep looking at her, there would come a time where he would have to tell her. That she’s pretty. That he hopes he can do for her what she’s been doing for him since their meeting. That even though everyone is just a spectrum of personalities and there was nothing about her that was special�"she was. He wanted to tell her all of that, and about galaxies worth of more. But for now�"for now he would just be there.

“Hey Cal,” Simon called.

“Yeah?” She cocked her head to the side.

“What do you think of the bees?”

Cal was caught off guard and was silent for a moment, “they’re pretty cute.”

Simon almost burst into laughter, “yeah, I suppose they are.”