Driven

Written in the car

She drives like wildfire

Fast and uncontrolled

Unevenly coating the pavement

with her angry fumes

Her head is falling to her chest

Small salty diamonds

Drip onto her lap

Her hands are burning

Arms are aching

With the inclination to veer off to the left

Hard and with great intention

To end the night in flames

Reviews

[alan peter kelly]

Personally, I can think of a more gentle suicide, however, what I think now compared to how I'd fare in the centre of an intense episode where eyes can't see for the deluge from suddenly incontrollable tear ducts...the circumstantial clashes with and then overwhelms the biological, existential self...white hot and steaming is lava on stone...anything is possible and such scenes rarely end well. It feels so personal...for if it's a fiction I must congratulate you as it worked for me. I write such sprawling reviews which could be even longer but must curtail for the sake of time constraints and necessity to read and comment on other writers while I'm here. Looking forward to reading more of you.

[ARLorenz]

Thank you for this review. It was meant to be quite personal and I am glad it came across as such. I look forward to visiting your profile and reading your work.

[alan peter kelly]

Most welcome :)

[That Guy]

You wrote this in the car! Wow, great job... It is a wonderful piece of poetry, feelings must have been running deep and it refelect in your
poem... Thank you for the salt of your tears on paper!

[Victoriana]

even though sad and painful, you made it sound so grand and intense. I like it:)

[Tamika]

I absolutely love this. It is written so well, and I am really glad I read it. "She drives like wildfire" is such a strong line, and as soon as I read that I could picture the car driving crazily, it set the tone of the poem, and I could tell it would be a strong poem, due to the intensity of the imagery of this line. So you opened with a bang. I love you used the word "coating", when referring to her driving along the road. I think this was an interesting word to use, which created even more imagery and it didn't make it boring instead of just simply saying driving along the pavement, yknow? "Small salty diamonds" is a wonderful, and beautiful way to describe tears, and once again adds imagery, which this whole poem is so strong with throughout, so I really commend you on that. I love how you said "her hands are burning/arms are aching", because so often this is literally how ones body reacts to anger, heartbreak, sadness, adrenalin, whatever it may be. And to finish my review, I adore the last line, and it really did this poem justice and tied it up perfectly. Such a wonderful poem and you should be incredibly proud :)