Never Again

Just remember me.

I know the sun will be setting on us

Your eyes tell the truth of that clear enough

And when our love begins to collect dust

I will remember those eyes with your bluff

My mind will be a slave to my memories

They’re all I’ll have in my time of grief

Ice will fill my heart with bitter snow flurries

So piercing, lonely; there is no relief

When someone decides to take claim to your soul

Think of how we memorized the other so completely

Know that you once made it so I was whole

And how your arms held me so, so fiercely

I want to be forever soaked in your skin

Remember you loved me, but never again

 

Author's Note

So, I had an assignment to write a sonnet, and this is what I came up with. I really don't like being told to write a certain way, so I honestly think this is horrid, but alas; that is for you to judge.

This is basically someone saying, when you move on with your life, just remember you loved me once. Remember what we had.

Reviews

[<3 Simply Rebekah <3]

wow,
very strong poem,
I totally heard u on this one,
and I can't relate too,
I loved the lines:
"And when our love begins to collect dust
I will remember those eyes with your bluff
My mind will be a slave to my memories"
they really suck out (in a good way)
especially the last line
thanks...(for reminding me to forget) ;)

[Princy]

Last 5 lines are damn touching the way I feel it.

[Antonio Valentino]

Alex, this was great, I'm glad I got to read it.

"Just remember me"

Yes, what more could one ask?
Antonio

[Alisa_the_fluff_ball]

I know the sun will be setting on us

I want to be forever soaked in your skin

GIVE.
ME.
YOUR.
BRAIN.

--Alisa_the_fluff_ball

[PaperHearts]

I've never written a sonnet before, but I really did enjoy reading this. xD
The beauty of your words really left me speechless, and I really felt like I could relate to the emotions that you described.
I liked how heartfelt and sincere your sonnet was, and could definitely feel the balance between the character's pain and grief and their love and contentment with allowing the person to move on.
The last line of your sonnet was like, PERFECTION. Hahaha, honestly, it was the most heartwrenching, yet affectionate way of ending the piece. :)
~PaperHearts

[deeps]

I really enjoed this write here.
I don't know to much about forms except Haiku's
But i like this. I thought it was wonderful

[bob, small b. aka invs]

i've never had any luck attempting sonnets. it seems to me you did pretty well. the line 'i want to be forever soaked in your skin' is simply a wonderful line. i can't review this as a sonnet, but as a simple piece of writing i think it's pretty darn good.

[Sean M. Addams]

i liked the imagery in this alot and thought you did an amazing job on this ..a deep and emotional write to me ..overall i thought you did a great job expressing yourself... very cool piece!!!