Dreamstate

There is a boy beyond the clouds in the sky

With wings black as death that help him fly

Last I saw him, he flew away with my heart

Whenever he visits, its beat starts

His wings enclose me; with him I am whole

He whispers I am an angel, from higher above then he could ever attempt to hold

I will spend eternity with him, encased in his wings

 

 

When woken from this dream of longing and hope,liquid descends from my eyes

His wings do not lift me up, they make me fall to my demise

I must escape from this dream that will never come true

For my eyes are blinded by this bittersweet lie that my mind clings to

There can be no more dreaming like a girl so in love

He can never be my reality; I cannot be with him above

The angel of death is not as alive as my dreams make him to be

Author's Note

Eh.
Tell me what you think.

Reviews

[Antonio Valentino]

Alex, this poem is layered with many crossroads that can go many ways, a true sign of good writing. A love apart is the sweetest sorrow that the state of dreams we all live in will embrace and fight to not let go. Just be careful, and ready, with your wishes. Sometimes they do come true.

Fantastic write.
Antonio

[Mercy Fae]

The bolded words add a grand effect to the overall feel of the piece.

[Emily]

Amazing how you got the words across. I love the meaning of it. Well written.

[Kristan A. Mohammed]

I really like this piece. Its rhyming scheme is just divine. I also liked how you used the first stanza to elaborate on the dream and utilized the second stanza to show you emotions after the end of the dream. Beautiful work. Especially since everyone can relate because we all have dreams that can't come true. Sadly

[Valkyrie Warrior]

Wow this is beautiful and sensual! I love it!!!

[Jana Furstenberg]

This brought a smile to my face. Truly, amazing. There were, in my opinion, a few flaws. I will not mention them, seeing as there were far more perfections than there were imperfections. This poem speaks of such truths. Everyone interprets things differently, and I interpreted this in a way that was dangerous. I thought of suicide. I thought of how death will not bring you life. I thought of how death is such a misconception through the eyes of others, and how most people consider death to be a solution.
Anywayyy. Fantastic word choice, thank you for sharing.

[Vera Fnk]

I really liked this poem! Great work :)

[M]

Thanks for sharing it was interesting to read :)

[Jennifer McQueen]

I like the write, but I think the randomly bolded words threw me and distracted from really taking in the whole piece. Have you considered taking them out?

[Vani Jalagar]

It was like I was in some fantasy world ....nice poetry.
“The angel of death has been abroad throughout the land; you may almost hear the beating of his wings.”

[Tena Luvs]

This was nice