In between the spaces

love poem (kind of)

 i want you to read this.

analyze it like you analyze me.

i want you to notice this.

every little detail.

the space between the words.

every single one is about you.

like everything else i do.

i want you to read this.

and think of me.

i want you to read this.

and put me in the spaces in your poetry.

let me live in between your thoughts.

let me be your muse.

i want you to read this.

and be graphic in your artistry.

you write in a way that offends my senses.

and i know,

i will never inspire that.

but i will try every chance i get.

i want you to read this.

and put me in your consonants.

put me in your vowels.

let me be the music.

that plays in the background while you write.

i want you to write me poems.

with lowercase letters.

and small soothing words.

and let me be the thought.

in between the spaces.

 

 

 

~amanda~

 

 

Author's Note

please ignore the lowercase letters. i wrote this one really quickly just now, and dont really feel like editing just yet. (im sure i will in the future)

Reviews

[Arthur Henn]

Smiling upon this....Amanda, you really got me going with this one as I like to write about romance and sensuality. The beauty that flows from within that soul of yous and what shows outside, how can one as myself not want to write you a poem.

This is my comment of a review right now. With your permission, I would like to have this dance of writing a poem of a comment to this.

Forewarning, no telling what I'll unearth from the heart of my soul :-)

Art

[Rick Puetter]

Dear Amada,

A very complex poem, and more on that below, but first PLEASE take out all of the inappropriate periods at the end of each line. What are they there for? They're not proper punctuation and just ruin the flow.

Now, onto the subject matter of the poem. Wow, very interesting. In the opening you point out that this person (the one that the poem is about) almost possesses you as he has worked his way into every single "space between the words" that you write. And you want this to be the same for him, i.e., that you fill the spaces between his words. But in the center of the poem there is this conflict: "you write in a way that offends my senses". So that begs the question of why you want this person to so fill your life and you to fill his. Yet apparently you do. But perhaps this is just misinterpretation on my part. Since while you say: "i will never inspire that", in the very next line you say: "but i will try every chance i get". What, to inspire words that offend your senses? I'm a bit confused on this.

Anyway, very interesting.

Best regards,

Rick

[Wondering Mind]

Very creative for lack of a better word at the moment. It certainly is a divergence from the "usual". Lower case or not, it was an experience to read.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Certainly a different kind of love poem but that is a great thing... I think in poetry it's what's between the lines that counts more then what is being directly said and in a love poem it's the hidden message you leave your love that only you to understand, it shows just how close you are when you shut the world out, a tender but intellectual write.

[Voltaire Mephisto (aka ..]

You're obsessed, but that's okay. I suggest you stalk this person and add some spice to his life.

[bluessadmood]

My God ,you surely ask a lot ,and know exactly what to ask,you ask him to put you in his thoughts in his mind,in his words when he writes so you are always on his mind ,it you,you want to inspire him,lovely words ,i liked these lines a lot..
and put me in the spaces in your poetry.
let me live in between your thoughts.
let me be your muse.
and put me in the spaces in your poetry.
let me live in between your thoughts.
let me be your muse.
just perfect everything i read here,what love ,what great sensation,i just loved every word here,this is really romantic,full of feelings,dreamy and wonderful writing,i just loved it all

[Orlando Murcia]

Very alluring to read once again
again and again, and again and again

Great write,
I loved your flow of words
and your creativity

Orlando M

[Adrian K. Smith]

I would drop the kind of, in a sense, seeing this as a love poem. There are so many angles from which one could come to this piece, from as simple as write about me and let me know that I matter to use your words to make love to me. One could even see it as a poetic metaphor, asking that one be loved. It is touching, and it offers that room for so much thought. Well done...

[BrightEyes]

I rather like the lowercase letters here; leaving more of those spaces to be filled. amazing thoughts going on here; filling up spaces between thoughts, words, lines ....becoming the inspiration. becoming everything; each thought.

[PureAbstrakt]

The thought you put into this was clearly very intense. The result, your poem, stands to prove that good poetry can often start with concentrating on one good intense idea at a time, rather than letting it disintegrate into many little baby-ideas that lack intensity and color...That repeating line gives your poem rhythm and structure; as for the lower case writing...that works just fine, it all becomes some sort of incantation...