this is how it ends

unrequited love poems (are there any other kind?)

  When I think about you,

I can't recall the good times.

Although I'm sure we had a few. 


I can only remember

you looking at me, and then,

"For once, let's do the right thing". 
And we never talked again. 



It was the right thing to do.




I cleaned my room the other day,

And stumbled upon your flowers.

Those ugly neon daisies you brought me,

On that rainy January day. 



I threw them away

And never looked at them again.

Like we never loved at all.




 

Reviews

[Adrian K. Smith]

There is something to be said about the length of this piece, and that something to be said is something good. I have seen where works touching on this topic appear to drag on for days, a torture to read that leaves me wishing for that time back. This though, in the length, offers some additional - perhaps subtle - meaning to the piece. If the gentleman in question only left you with the memory of him saying the right thing was to skadoodle, then the gentleman in question was a total d****e. Finding the flowers and tossing them, doing the right thing; so many people might have held on to them - a bitter mistake. A painful memory to be true, but not a memory that you are going to let own you. The length, in my most likely not at all humble opinion, was the right thing.

[bob, small b. aka invs]

another very nice poem. i'm sorry you had some bad relationships, but they sure produced some nice poems.

[Kerwin]

This is very sad.....i dont know the situation at all of course but it sounds gutwrenching.

[Ocean Orchid]

very spontaneous flow & yr writing really speaks ...

[Brianna Brie]

This is a good letting go poem. I like the concept of throwing out daisies as a means of forgetting. Well done!

[Silent Kim aka mizmetap..]

Well expressed and written clear and with excellent word choices.

Thanks for entrering my contest and the best of luck.

[emmajoy]

Ouch! Do you regret throwing away the daisies now?!

There's something so sad about this poem even though it heralds a new era in your life.

The roll of the words : 'The stupid daisies you brought me, / On that rainy January day. 
 / I threw them away / And never looked at them again. Like we never loved at all.
 / It was the right thing to do.' really got to me, it reads sad, yet, not sad.. the end to something very special.

There's a great deal of emotion here, skill too, the combined creation of feelings and finality.

Thanks again for sharing.

[Frankie]

Beautiful! Amazing! Heart Moving! Something Something very touching!

[Christine]

Great poem. All your writing really speaks to me. You are a terrific writer!
~Christine :-)

[Tim McGovern]

I almost think the line " like we never loved" adds a bitterness that takes away from the simplicity of the poem.
the word " stupid" lets on to the fact that there is still anger, and probably other emotion.
Just throwing them away brings it back to you being strong and determined and maybe gone to far to go back and wonder.

This is deceptively simple and just perfect in length.
There's a lot to ponder in this short piece.
Nice work

Namaste'
tim

[Chahklat]

The last line finished off the poem so well. Although, I do think it could use some tuning up, tweaking here and there. The poem overall expresses heartbreak, but picking up after the fact. I like your determination to "do the right thing".