The lost geese

A sonnet, long laboured over!

The lost geese

 

Each spring they walked beside the lakes and saw,

vast skeins of chattering geese obey the call,

age old, unplanned, to fly far north in thrall

to some past tale of land released from icy maw.

 

Long summer days of northern sun, the geese

grazed long, content on seed filled reed and grass,

evading stalk of arctic fox and falcon’s pass,

to celebrate the end of summers lease.

 

At autumn’s end, they walked beside the lakes.

The youngster took his father’s hand and said,

‘the geese, they have not come, don’t say they’re dead.’

‘If they are lost, they’re lost for all our sakes!”

 

In lands far north the winter snows came late.

Too late, the geese flew south to meet their fate.

 

Reviews

[Chris Shaw]

Hello Alan, I know how difficult it is to write a sonnet, you have to be so disciplined, but I have to admit, once you've written one you do feel as though you have achieved something. This is quite lovely and the photograph you have posted of the geese in flight is so fitting. This is a delightful read. You get a pat on the back. Great work.

[alanwgraham]

Thanks Christine. You are spot on - it was tough but also very satisfying.
Cheers,
Alan

[Another Relic]

Nature cannot survive if the climate they have listened to for centuries has changed without notice. I've heard them fly over many times wondering where they go and their fate.

[alanwgraham]

You are right - we are all under threat. We see them passing over all winter.
Thanks for reading and your comments.
All the best, Alan

[Vivian Fisk]

Your photograph of these noble birds competing with a contrail for the sky is poetic in itself and a perfect accompaniment for the words to follow. I found this whole experience--the geese, their soldierly flight, their sad fate--to be a memorable heartbreak almost like war poetry.

[alanwgraham]

Thanks for your very kind and 'eloquent' review. This is definitely not my typical writing - I wrote it years ago and found the discipline tough. It is a sad story but the sadder part is that the geese are a harbinger of our own demise. Just to cheer you up!
regards Alan

[barleygirl]

Beautiful job! This is a surprising & satisfying style of poetry coming from you (usually not so lyrical or structured). I'm no expert on meter, which seems to be an essential part of a sonnet, but to me the rhythm of the reading seems right-on & the rhyming works well, too. The enjambment in stanza 2 is smoothly done. I love the vivid details of the natural settings & creatures. I'm not sure as to the cause of the demise of the geese, but I'm assuming it's related to climate change, so I'm in full agreement as to your meaning. Love the tones of melancholy thru-out, as our planet is changing & we are losing becuz of it (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[alanwgraham]

Thanks for your kind words Margie, You are quite right in spotting that this is much more conventional than most of my current offerings. It dates back before the eventful weekend about four years ago when I had a manic episode and i couldn't stop writing very free stream of consciousness poetry. Most of that I've got 'locked in the safe' but the oblique way of looking at things seems to have stuck. It has been interesting to say the least! I know this is not true for everyone but my experience of bipolar has not been a totally negative thing. Thankfully I don't seem to get the down side.
And yes, it was climate change i was thinking about.
All the best,
Alan

[barleygirl]

I took medication for my bipolar for 4 years, but decided to live with the drawbacks, in order to live without meds. All in all, I agree with you completely, that the creative and/or energetic bursts are well worth the other bad mood times (((HUGS)))

[Kelly Scheppers]

They are fascinating creatures. I remember watching a documentary on them not too long ago on their journey southward, but what you've penned here is truly a gorgeous sonnet, Alan! So touching, and I love the photo you chose to accompany it as well.

[alanwgraham]

Thanks Kelly. I found the discipline of writing this tough but worth the effort. We see the geese flying over in great numbers over the winter so I suppose that was the inspiration and also the effect of climate change.
All the best,
Alan

[Norman 223]

Loved the story behind this poem, Alan, but was intrigued by this form of sonnet. I did lot of research and it appears to be more in the style of a rondel with the rhyming pattern. This is not intended as criticism, as this structure is more diffcult to maintain as you have to think "further ahead" when composing it.

[Karen Redburn]

Enjoyed this sonnet. When the subject is nature it is a hit with me! There are lessons in here, and the finish, flying south to meet their fate is exactly what I feel like doing today as it is -25C. Wonderful poem, cheers mate!

[alanwgraham]

Thanks again Karen. This was written ages ago when I found it hard work to write this although meeting the very proscribed formula for a sonnet is not easy.
Cheers and have a productive 2018!
Alan

[Taino]

Beautiful imagery. We live surrounded by Canadian geese here and other water fowl So vivid! Love your poem!

[alanwgraham]

Thanks taino. We watch the geese flying over in their thousands each winter but we are putting it all in threat.
Regards, alan

[Beccy]

I absolutely adore the sentiment in this; especially the third stanza which is quite lovely.

One or two lines where the syllable count is not as it should be, (sorry, me just being a purist,) but strangely, aside from the word 'again' in line one stanza three, which is superfluous; the different counts, don't jar or overly interrupt the flow of what is a really excellent sonnet.

Beccy.

[alanwgraham]

Thanks beccy and good writing in 2018! I did find the discipline of this tough and I will see if I can iron out the count.
Regards, alan