'Any Change Pal'

A take on how any of us could end of homeless

‘Any change pal?’

 

My route home from work at the garage took me along Princes Street and down Leith walk. Walking Princes Street these days is a walk past a assortment of beggars. It’s hard not to be aware of them.  It’s best to look the other way; it’s best to ignore them if you want to avoid hassle. They can all look the same at a glance - a dog, a blanket, often a brief back-story felt-penned on cardboard, a bunnet or a paper cup. ‘Any change pal?’  Best to ignore and walk on! I’m actually quite generous in my own way, but who knows where your money would go - booze, drugs, f**s, even some gang-master with his Merc and garish villa? Best walk on! As you walk away you are often taunted with, ‘have a nice day sir!’

 

Yesterday I saw a young lad sitting shivering with bare feet on a corner in George Street.  He was struggling to hold his cup up.

‘Any ch.ch.ch.change p.p.p.pal?’ For some reason I suddenly saw red - what possible circumstances in Scotland in the year 2016 could conceivable lead to anyone sitting begging in bare feet?

‘Do you all think we’re idiots you lazy waster. Get off your backside, collect your shoes from where you’ve hidden them and go and find some bloody work.’ He looked sheepish and retaliated with, ‘what would you know about being homeless you wanker!’

 

A year later -

I keep rerunning it all in my head, it’s hard to believe! Today seemed the final straw. I thought I had it all - wife, two young kids, a good job at the garage, our annual holiday to the sun. Then I was laid off at the garage. I thought I could get another job easily. Lots of applications and a few interviews later and I was getting anxious. Our savings were disappearing fast and then I started to feel depressed which doesn’t help much when you’re job hunting.

 

Then it all got too much and I had a kind of breakdown. Oh - and I should mention my drinking - it eased my worries - for a while! Then one night I just lost the plot and ended up in the mental hospital. Jill stood by me but when I came home she said she wanted me to leave - she was worried about how my drinking and erratic behaviour would affect the kids. I pleaded, I broke down in tears but to no effect. She gave me half our savings but by now they were almost gone - a few hundred pounds. I had to leave her and the kids in the house so I had nowhere to stay. A pal helped with a bed - ‘just a week Dave, sorry!’ The council were no help - no houses for those that make themselves homeless.  Then I was sanctioned when I couldn’t get to my jobseekers interview on time - the bus had broken down! That didn't cut much ice!

 

I was on a downward spiral now and it felt out of my control. I spent a week in a hostel. They were mainly decent guys but take your choice from damaged ex-forces, mental problems, drink and drugs  - all exacerbated by the cruel money pinching ministrations of our dear government. Then something horrible happened to me in the hostel. One night the guy in the room next door asked me to his room for a cup of coffee and then tried to assault me. No-one listened to my complaints.

 

I gathered my few possessions and left. I had nowhere to sleep but I remembered that Bill, who I’d met at the hostel, had told me about a safe place to sleep rough in the park shelters. Feeling a bit scared I climbed the fence and made my way to the shelter. I was greeted with a cheery shout.

‘Hi Dave,’ I see that you’ve finally made it to the ‘Balmoral! Willy here will show you to your room Sir!’ That was the first time I’d laughed for months! Then Willy handed me a length of cardboard.

 

The next morning I was cold, very tired and with only a handful of coppers in my pockets. Bill took me up to the Bridges. ‘You sit along there Dave - and here’s your paper cup. You know what to do!’ He could see the forlorn look on my face and put a consoling hand on my shoulder. ‘It’ll get easier mate!’

 

I sat on a bit of cardboard feeling very self-conscious. How had it come to this? What would I say? Eventually I plucked up courage.

 

 ‘Any change pal?’

Reviews

[Kathy Van Kurin]

'Any Change Pal?
alanwgraham,
This was a very meaningful and soulful piece. My husband and I have been involved in work in Portland with the homeless. I have known individuals which are homeless and they have many stories which fit right in with your portrayal. The process of ending up on the street is definitely one of gradual process a lot of the time. The examples in your story are right on too.
Well here is to hope for the ones who give and care and the houseless to not give up.
Blessings,
Kathy

[alanwgraham]

Thanks for taking the time to find this old bit of writing and for your kind review. Also well done for your own help to the homeless. The whole issue is very complex and I believe there are no easy answers.
Hope you are well Kathy and I look forward to reading more of your writing.
All the best,
Alan

[Duncan Brown]

France France France.....................

[alanwgraham]

Thanks, c'est last vie!

[DonielleMikel]

This is really powerful....makes me reevaluate my own life really. It was great and kept my attention the entire way through! Great job!

[Woody]

we have a saying that goes something like: life is treacherous. don't trust it.
I guess this is universal. you can have it all but you never know what life has in store for you. and, especially never look down on people.
that's the gist of your story, alan and you wrote it beautifully. very touching. a lesson for all.
someone who can write this is certainly a person with a big heart.

[alanwgraham]

That is very kind of you woody. About twenty years ago I had a major manic attack which was later revealed as bipolar. I came through a spell in psych hosp with the support of family but I could see how difficult it was for those that didn't. Thanks again,
Alan

[Woody]

I'm glad you pulled through, alan.

[alanwgraham]

Thanks again, these things are difficult for family but on the whole it has been a positive for me. Luckily I don't get depressed and the manic side has definitely released a strong creative urge. I don't recommend it as a lifestyle choice however!
Will keep in touch.
Regards,
Alan

[Woody]

you retained your sense of humour and that's a damn bonus in my book.

[forgotten_ghosts]

A very interesting story with a simple message. Everybody can come in this situation and we are not to judge about people or have prejudice against those, who lost everything while we live our lives in this society, which is all about consuming. I like the language and the stil you used because the story is very easy to understand and therefore the message ( or what I suppose is the message ) doesn't get pushed into the background.
A very good story!
Best regards,
Thomas

[alanwgraham]

Thank you for your encouraging words. I do like to keep it simple because the purpose of the exercise is communication.
Regards, alan

[A.C. Jones]

I do like the message behind the story. It was simple, but profound. There is a lot that we miss when we don't get the whole story.

[barleygirl]

Your message here is brilliant & timely & painted realistically in words. In the first part, your disdain is so intense, it's almost painful to read, especially using such offensive words as "f*g" . . . then the story turns & hard times hit the judgmental one. Very satisfying that he got his come-uppance. In the end, the twist of your story goes even further, to show the homeless person scorned earlier as holding no grudge. All these elements make for a fantastic parable of life lessons, if only the writing didn't feel rushed & unedited, with mistakes & not polished.

[alanwgraham]

Thanks very much for the review. I was trying to get over the disdain shown to our homeless and then the truth that we are all but a few short steps away from a similar fate. I fear that again we may be divided by our common language- f*g is used as our meaning of cigarette! Also I will get busy polishing!
Cheers,
Alan trot

[alanwgraham]

Sorry for the rubbish after my name- I suffered a 'tablet malfunction'! Can't wait to get back to real computer.

[barleygirl]

I've never had a "device" (for sexual pleasure or communication) *heh! heh! heh!* . . . I wouldn't be able to function without a full keyboard! Thanks for explaining "f*g" (((HUGS)))

[alanwgraham]

Thanks -
you are giving unnecessary information out!

[A.W. Carl]

I really really like the themes and messages in this story. The story was a bit abrupt for me. I know this is flash fiction, but I wanted more. I wanted more transition and more details between the before and after. I think if you took this same idea and dragged it out to a short story somehow, the message could be even more powerful. Just my 2 cents.

Love the tough subject matter and the truth in this story

[alanwgraham]

Thanks AW. Homelessness is a sign of the times!
Alan

[A. Amos]

There are very few writers who can touch this subject in such an amazing manner. I read the whole story in one go as it made me forget the world. Never estimate any one you never know time can switch you at his or her place. Would be back to read more of your stories, consider me a true fan...respect!

[alanwgraham]

Thanks very much for your read of this and review. I agree that we should always be looking for the reason. I look forward to looking at some of your work,
Cheers,Alan

[A. Amos]

You're most welcome Alan...

[KT-B]

It is so sad the amount of homeless people there are in Edinburgh, I took my kids up the bridges to see the fireworks at the end of the festival and we stopped at a wee newsagent to buy some juice, there was a homeless guy outside so I asked him if he wanted anything whilst we were in - he said "a can of coke would be great please" I asked if he wanted anything to eat but he said no the coke was fine... I gave him the change which was only about a fiver and my son turned to me and said "that was nice of you mum". A bloody can of coke it's not really enough is it? As you pointed out so well, becoming homeless could happen to anyone, it nearly happened to my brother, the academic in the family, after he took a breakdown he had to use all his savings to live of, pay bills etc, reached rock bottom when it had all run out a few years later, we were despairing about what was going to happen to him and he very nearly did end up homeless, thankfully he pulled through and is back on track but oh yes I agree it is so easy and could happen to anyone. Well done more food for thought I look your style.

[KT-B]

"like your style" even!