distance does not sway

distance does not sway

these thoughts away

from softly silken lips.

 

tyranny arrives inside

the moments wasted

biding precious time.

 

seems years must pass

through semi-dark beyond

grasp of tender tactile touch,

 

holding breath instead

of counting steps

towards those softly

 

silken lips away from

thoughts that distance

cannot sway. 

Reviews

[Khitii Lae-Ahn]

L'amour ne peut pas etre empeche par la distance

Ni la terre ni la mer peut separer le coeu de sa maison

Vous etes ma maison
seul porteur mon coeur
gardien de mon essence

Je suis tout a vous

Toujours, K


C'est un poeme a couper le souffle
Delicate mais rempli de passion et de desir

[Khitii Lae-Ahn]

[MiidniightSoul]

Such a beautiful poem. I even read it three times in a row. I really liked it and the flow just feels natural. Wonderful work here, my friend.

[FlawedByDesign]

A beautifully penned piece.
Devotion and longing subdued with warmth and tenderness present in your words; the gentleness of "holding breath towards the softly silken lips" renders the distance between two hearts immaterial.
Couple of things which didn't sit well with me are, "tactile touch" - there is a slight redundancy here in my opinion, and the break of stanzas - this holds for the latter 3 stanzas, as there is no need to break them, but when broken up there is a pause created, which doesnt suit the flow.

Nicely done.

[TAO]

indeed...like the nonlocality evident in the quantum world. Beautiful.

[Khitii Lae-Ahn]

mon coeur...

eloignement ne peut pas balancer le coeur.

Il s'attarde dans la chaleur de reves ...
alors je compte les jours jusqu'a ce que nous sommes ensemble.

L'obscurite ne peut pas nous lier, quand l'amour illumine le chemin ...
et vous êtes ma lumiere eternelle ...
ma chaleur ...
mon souffle ...
mon coeur qui bat ...
tu es mon soleil et la lune, mes etoiles et du ciel ...
vous etes mon seul, mon tout ...
et vous appartient ...
maintenant et toujours

XoXoXo

[jenniewren (J.W. Bouwma..]

i can feel the gentle tone you would use for this.. you've truly come into a style of writing that speaks very clearly to who you are. this feels natural and flows so perfectly

[Fleur-de-lys]

Your own poem re. the tyranny of distance. Beautiful thoughts; I am glad you will neither be swayed.

[Wildfleour]

A melodic feel to this poem, Alan. A chant of passion.

[Moonflower]

ohh I loved this one, dear. It was soft and whispering, like a love spell~Beautiful work.