child

the child in me is tired
she wants to come out and play
it’s a little late for another beer
but how else must i end the day
to quiet the child in me
all the distraught and disarray
she says to
wiggle my toes and feel the dirt
turn into soil and nourish the earth
a lively song flutters beneath
remember life! how loving and sweet?

my child is yearning
to taste the greens and yellows and red
she dozed off a while ago
when i first began to feel the dread

and quieter now, than ever was,
she’s let’s me take the wheel
because my child is tired and yearning
to feel the way i used to feel
my child is desperate and alone
what was will never be
a person beneath the maturity
the quiet girl who used to speak

my child is laughing
at me, a cowering fraud who pretends to live with glee
at me, a windowless figure breaking at the seams
at me, a pale canvas printed black and blue
at me, the one who forgot everything i once knew

my child is waiting
for me, to bring down the walls
to look above the clouds and remember what was
for me, to relinquish the mock-up mind
to wake up one day and lift my tired eyes
release the sheets and leave my fears astray
I’ll wiggle my toes and let my child play