Just to have U back

Read the start carefully and connect with end.

The frozen wind was unfrozen,
And the eyes blinked
Her hair was dangling with wind just like the tree leaves
And the eyes blinked
She was able to feel her finger after the numbness
And the eyes blinked
She could see her reflection clearly in the black river
And the eyes blinked
And then she saw him
And then the eyes open

Finally she woke up from her dream
Trying to remember her dream
She remembered she saw him(Ri)

Then she did what almost everyone do this days,checked her phone. when she saw the date she knew it was long day.

She went for bath. After that she was drying her wet body with the towel and she saw her self in the mirror.

Then she saw something strange she saw that her face was changing. Slowly her eyes were taking different shape like she is a pottery and she could recognize this face. It his face(Ri)

She felt the fear and thought it's illusion. To escape it with countless breathing she splashed her face with water to get rid of it and she could finally see her face. Standing near the mirror almost for 10minutes with her blank face expression she thought she move on.

She finally got ready and then she took the bus to go to college. While sitting at the window and listening to her favourite music all she could do is think of him. She saw out of the window and lot of things reminded about him.

She arrived in the college and joined her assigned group for group project. The group members were her good friends but then the strange thing happened again. This time all her friends face were changing into RI's face. She felt so irritated. She fought with her friends for no reason, pissed them and left.
She quietly went in library and sat down
She knows she is strong and she didn't wanted to ruin her day as it was a special one because she had a date.

After reading a book she left for her date met her date in a cafe near by her college. She liked him as a he was a talker. While he was talking all she did is that she stared into his eyes like a lost soul found a home. This what exactly Ri used to do when she used to talk and he used stare in her eyes.

she blinked her and saw a vivid image of RI in his eyes. She turned back suddenly to see him but then by mistake her hand clashed the glass of water which felt on her date and their it ruined the date. She apologized him and left the cafe in hurry as she couldn't take this anymore.

When she arrived home she got fresh and came to her bed with laptop.

As her part of her group project work was to find places which is said to be haunted with spirits and then she finds a place named about Black river a small pond in the between of a forest.
She plans to go there next day.
In the morning she packs bag and leaves for the forest.

She rides her bike towards the forest she reaches there by evening as sun was planning to go. She entered the forest with curios eyes and feared mind.

She brought the map with her to find the lake. She felt so afraid she plugged her earphones and continued her journey after walking for an hour and pushing through bushes she arrived there. while she stood at the Black river She felt like she has seen this place a strong wind came making a loud noise of leaves like the free,loud fun laugh of human. Then she saw her reflection in the water and when she turned around she saw RI. She wasn't shocked to see him because she felt like he was supposed to be there. She asked her what do you want?
He replied to just to have you back.
She hugged him and then the only things she was afraid was closing her eyes. She didn't wanted it to be a dream and she closed her while the tears roll down.

Author's Note

Looking for constructive feedback on this one.

Reviews

[Zorg]

When you say you want feedback, are you saying you want the story beta-read and/or critiqued? There is something there, but quite frankly, there are so many typos, punctuation and grammar issues, and narrative problems that it's difficult to make sense out of it. Not that it is wrong, but are you writing just for your own entertainment?

[barleygirl]

This is not a complicated story . . . pretty simple & straightforward . . . but what makes your story compelling to read is the way you include so much strong detail about what’s going on & what your characters are like. I became involved in your story, becuz I was getting to know your characters, so I cared what happened to them. Even tho the ending isn’t a big splash, like many stories try to be, your simple ending is satisfying becuz you took us thru these lives & got us involved in the outcome of your characters. It’s the way you pick details & the gentle way you share them thru-out the story. You do a great job of painting the scene & letting us know & like your characters (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Akash gaikwad]

happy that you recognized that the end is simple. Thank you for your meaningful and kind review.

[Soraya]

" While he was talking all she did is that she stared into his eyes like a lost soul found a home" just loved it, about the story, I really liked how she saw Ri's face on every one's face, and in every where, it's a very dreamy story

[Akash gaikwad]

Thanks for recognize that beautiful line !! Yes its very dreamy story!! Thank you for reading and for your review!!!

[Jaskaran Singh Sethi]

It was simply awesome especially the line she didn't wanted it to be a dream

[Akash gaikwad]

Thanks for coming back and reading the whole story!! Means lot to me!!

[Pooja Chintamani]

Super !! initially it's suspicious but very keenly unfolding the dream!! Thank you to make me read!!

[Akash gaikwad]

I appreciate your review thank you for reading it!!

[MeikoShion]

so moving! i love it. its very good!

[Akash gaikwad]

Thanks master Katey for reading and appreciating it !!!

[AlphaGemini]

As with a lot of your work, there are deep and meaningful undertones at work here. A great deal of your writing has such great potential and shines, but i really feel like something is lost here in the language barrier. It's almost as if the more meaningful aspects could be conveyed really well but fall just short, to only glimmer below the surface like your writing has not yet reached its full potential. Something to consider I suppose, to communicate your feelings and ideas better. But still really lovely work.

[Akash gaikwad]

I really liked your review. I totally agree with you I have not reached my potential yet! I can do great I know it just that my vocab is not that strong and I do lot of grammar mistake.

[AlphaGemini]

The best advice I can give you is just to read and read and read. Soak up a book per week or as fast as you can, but while doing so look at how they structure sentences for flow, and then larger bodies of text too. It makes for great training, and you'll learn a lot more vocab.

[Akash gaikwad]

I have many books and keep buying but end up reading none!! But i should read them! Thanks for your advice I know your words are of wisdom..

[Ace Jaxon]

Quite a beautiful piece of work, and at first I thought that Ri was dead and not just gone. I know that probably sounds stupid and such, but every now again I'll see the eyes of my old friend who died not so long ago and pray that he wasn't just a dream and he had come back, but at last it was never true.

[Akash gaikwad]

I don't know I have tried to write story in such way that I start she is dreaming but at the she is in the dream.

[Ace Jaxon]

I know just at first I didn't understand

[Jaskaran Singh Sethi]

You are sheer brilliance.keep up the good work.it was so lengthy I had to leave in midway

[Akash gaikwad]

Thanks for your review!! Its actually a short story !! I have tried to make it more short!! But I will try again !! Till then you can read my :Take me home' story it is shorter then you will think

[Jaskaran Singh Sethi]

Ok brother

[Onlyme]

When your dreams. Do actually come true. You foretold the future in your dream. The night before. Lovely idea. good concept and interesting.

[Akash gaikwad]

Thanks so much Dee for your review!!!

[Onlyme]

My pleasure. Look forward to reading more from you real soon.